I apologize for the length of this post. I'm new to this internet forums but I recently came across this forum after going through a divorce around 18 months ago.
I am a paralegal for a general practice law firm. Unfortunately, we don't handle bankruptcies, probate or real estate law.
I guess if we did, I would have known what was coming.
Anyway, here's my story and I seek your advice. Thank you all in advance for being a listening ear or ....a reading eye rather:
I've probably had the worst weekend I've ever had in my life about two months ago.
Once upon a time I was married (in reality not all that long ago) and we signed a consent order and the Court entered our consent order requiring him to pay all of our debts.
Actually, this is how it worked. My ex and I sat in a room while our attorneys and one mediator tried to negotiate the division of marital property (assets and debts).
My husband had a 401K, we had a money market account, a mutual funds account, a checking account, a savings account and all of these assets totalled around $32K if I recall correctly.
At the same time we had car debt from a vehicle he leased and turned in (we ended up being upside down on it by about $13,000), credit car debt, a loan we took out after our son was born to redecorate and expand his room, and college debt.
All of those debts totalled around 40K+ if I recall correctly.
At this point we had been married for 6 years and we did marry very young. I was only 19.
My husband said he wanted the money market account, he wanted me to waive rights to his 401K, he wanted the mutual funds and I could have the checking and savings account which only totalled maybe 7K or so.
Anyway, I obviously said NO WAY and told the mediator to go back into the little room he was sitting in and tell him I'll see him in Court.
Well the mediator came back with a surprise. She tells me my husband still wants all these assets but in exchange he will also take all debt.
Remember that we got married when I was 18 so all of our credit is totally entangled with one another. I don't think there is a loan or credit card that we didn't have joint liability on.
Anyway, I thought to myself...if the court splits things 50/50 then I'd have $16,000 worth of assets but I'd also have 20K worth of debt. That means my networth would still be -$4000.00.
My husband offering to take on ALL the debt and leave me with 7K worth of assets (savings and checking account) sounded like a good deal because I was young and I had a good job and I just KNEW that I could build my small fortune back up with no problem.
So I accepted the offer, we signed the order, the Courts entered an Order and we proceeded with the divorce.
After the fact I was TOO happy to call the creditors and tell them please send all future correspondence to the ex and provided them with his address.
Thank God right?!!!
WRONG!
Recently, I found out that my ex has filed for bankruptcy. You know what that means? It means that the creditors can no longer contact him in regards to paying the debts. Creditors are not happy people when it comes to writing things off so guess what? That's right! They are coming after me for ALL the debt that my ex said he'd take on. Only now I have no assets to pay them off with. I handed over all those assets which he has since liquidated thinking he would pay ALL debt.
I am so upset right now that I don't really know what to do with myself! But, my purpose in writing this is not to get pity from you. My purpose is to let you know to watch yourself, watch joint liability accounts, watch entangling your credit rating and score with your significant other because it can come back to bite you in your behind. I work for a family law firm and it NEVER occurred he'd do that to me. I was quite the fool!
After speaking with an attorney (whom I work for), I was instructed that bankrupty law which is in the same category as federal law supercedes any domestic or state court orders. Apparently, this means I cannot even get a court order requiring him to pay those debts because bankruptcy/federal law says he's no longer responsible.
For more information about how to protect yourself, please visit this site from the Federal Trade Commission. It's very important.
Take care and be blessed.
I am a paralegal for a general practice law firm. Unfortunately, we don't handle bankruptcies, probate or real estate law.
I guess if we did, I would have known what was coming.
Anyway, here's my story and I seek your advice. Thank you all in advance for being a listening ear or ....a reading eye rather:
I've probably had the worst weekend I've ever had in my life about two months ago.
Once upon a time I was married (in reality not all that long ago) and we signed a consent order and the Court entered our consent order requiring him to pay all of our debts.
Actually, this is how it worked. My ex and I sat in a room while our attorneys and one mediator tried to negotiate the division of marital property (assets and debts).
My husband had a 401K, we had a money market account, a mutual funds account, a checking account, a savings account and all of these assets totalled around $32K if I recall correctly.
At the same time we had car debt from a vehicle he leased and turned in (we ended up being upside down on it by about $13,000), credit car debt, a loan we took out after our son was born to redecorate and expand his room, and college debt.
All of those debts totalled around 40K+ if I recall correctly.
At this point we had been married for 6 years and we did marry very young. I was only 19.
My husband said he wanted the money market account, he wanted me to waive rights to his 401K, he wanted the mutual funds and I could have the checking and savings account which only totalled maybe 7K or so.
Anyway, I obviously said NO WAY and told the mediator to go back into the little room he was sitting in and tell him I'll see him in Court.
Well the mediator came back with a surprise. She tells me my husband still wants all these assets but in exchange he will also take all debt.
Remember that we got married when I was 18 so all of our credit is totally entangled with one another. I don't think there is a loan or credit card that we didn't have joint liability on.
Anyway, I thought to myself...if the court splits things 50/50 then I'd have $16,000 worth of assets but I'd also have 20K worth of debt. That means my networth would still be -$4000.00.
My husband offering to take on ALL the debt and leave me with 7K worth of assets (savings and checking account) sounded like a good deal because I was young and I had a good job and I just KNEW that I could build my small fortune back up with no problem.
So I accepted the offer, we signed the order, the Courts entered an Order and we proceeded with the divorce.
After the fact I was TOO happy to call the creditors and tell them please send all future correspondence to the ex and provided them with his address.
Thank God right?!!!
WRONG!
Recently, I found out that my ex has filed for bankruptcy. You know what that means? It means that the creditors can no longer contact him in regards to paying the debts. Creditors are not happy people when it comes to writing things off so guess what? That's right! They are coming after me for ALL the debt that my ex said he'd take on. Only now I have no assets to pay them off with. I handed over all those assets which he has since liquidated thinking he would pay ALL debt.
I am so upset right now that I don't really know what to do with myself! But, my purpose in writing this is not to get pity from you. My purpose is to let you know to watch yourself, watch joint liability accounts, watch entangling your credit rating and score with your significant other because it can come back to bite you in your behind. I work for a family law firm and it NEVER occurred he'd do that to me. I was quite the fool!
After speaking with an attorney (whom I work for), I was instructed that bankrupty law which is in the same category as federal law supercedes any domestic or state court orders. Apparently, this means I cannot even get a court order requiring him to pay those debts because bankruptcy/federal law says he's no longer responsible.
For more information about how to protect yourself, please visit this site from the Federal Trade Commission. It's very important.
Take care and be blessed.

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