Can I ask a favour of y'all?
I went to school with Ray. Can I please ask if anyone reading this would please consider just a note to cheer up my friend Ray, as he is considering bankruptcy? Just a kind comment on his blog, please? Thank you so much.
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How I have failed
I am the lowest of the low. I am the scummest of the scum. I....have....failed my family.
I did not set out on this path. I knew exactly what I wanted and how I wanted to do it. A long time ago, that is. Then, I got lazy, and what I wanted didn't happen.
Still, I was at least comfortable, and that was the worst thing that could have happened to me. To be comfortable. Because since I was comfortable, I didn't try to excel. Oh there were a few times where I tried my best, but it was not a consistent effort. I did not do my best day after day after day. I did not focus on excelling at one thing, which could have led to so many other things. As a result, I was pigeonholed and, as a result, expendable from my comfortable world.
I could have done something when things became uncomfortable. I could have shared this with the greatest human being on the face of the earth, my lovely wife, but I didn't. I thought I could fix it without her finding out. I thought I could be Superman just long enough to get to comfortability, then resume my comfortable, if not exactly risk taking, life. Of course, that isn't how it worked. I could have changed, but I didn't. I instead lied more...and more.....and more. And now, with bankruptcy staring me in the face, and the inability to give to my wife and my kids, all seems lost. I'm pretty sure all is not exactly lost, but it sure feels that way. I work, but I make no money. I know how I could make money, but I don't follow through.....as always, half-arsed. For all my talk, I have learned nothing from my hard-working family. I learned nothing that they taught me. Nothing. And now, the woman I love probably regrets ever meeting me. And I don't blame her. I would go back and erase me, too. What good have I done? Oh, I'm sure there are bits and pieces, but intentions don't buy you jack. They don't pay off credit cards you stupidly ran up. They don't pay off stupid loans you took out behind everyone's back. Largely, my life is wasted, except for bringing two stunningly wonderful kids into this world. And I had only a minimum hand in that.
Sorry to rant. Twill be the last one.
I went to school with Ray. Can I please ask if anyone reading this would please consider just a note to cheer up my friend Ray, as he is considering bankruptcy? Just a kind comment on his blog, please? Thank you so much.
===========
How I have failed
I am the lowest of the low. I am the scummest of the scum. I....have....failed my family.
I did not set out on this path. I knew exactly what I wanted and how I wanted to do it. A long time ago, that is. Then, I got lazy, and what I wanted didn't happen.
Still, I was at least comfortable, and that was the worst thing that could have happened to me. To be comfortable. Because since I was comfortable, I didn't try to excel. Oh there were a few times where I tried my best, but it was not a consistent effort. I did not do my best day after day after day. I did not focus on excelling at one thing, which could have led to so many other things. As a result, I was pigeonholed and, as a result, expendable from my comfortable world.
I could have done something when things became uncomfortable. I could have shared this with the greatest human being on the face of the earth, my lovely wife, but I didn't. I thought I could fix it without her finding out. I thought I could be Superman just long enough to get to comfortability, then resume my comfortable, if not exactly risk taking, life. Of course, that isn't how it worked. I could have changed, but I didn't. I instead lied more...and more.....and more. And now, with bankruptcy staring me in the face, and the inability to give to my wife and my kids, all seems lost. I'm pretty sure all is not exactly lost, but it sure feels that way. I work, but I make no money. I know how I could make money, but I don't follow through.....as always, half-arsed. For all my talk, I have learned nothing from my hard-working family. I learned nothing that they taught me. Nothing. And now, the woman I love probably regrets ever meeting me. And I don't blame her. I would go back and erase me, too. What good have I done? Oh, I'm sure there are bits and pieces, but intentions don't buy you jack. They don't pay off credit cards you stupidly ran up. They don't pay off stupid loans you took out behind everyone's back. Largely, my life is wasted, except for bringing two stunningly wonderful kids into this world. And I had only a minimum hand in that.
Sorry to rant. Twill be the last one.
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