Reality is setting in....

[flower04]

Our case is supposed to be confirmed next Tuesday. Our attorney doesn't anticipate any problems. Now we have to figure out a way to pay $5k tuition (previous employer was going to pay but got laid off), fix a car that just died last night ($1500 to fix) and get to a funeral for my cousin who just passed and we need to go across the country for the funeral services. She was 32 with 2 young kids and died of cancer after just being diagnosed 1 month ago. Pretty sad.

On top of that, my kids are all sick with what is probably the swine flu--day 4 of high fever, cough, etc. I think I have hit rock bottom and am hoping that it gets better....

We are supposed to start saving $ by not paying our mortgage for first/last month rent (need a large deposit too because of the 13) and we don't have anything saved. I am starting to get depressed, bigtime!

[oldhack]

Chapter 13 bankruptcy requires lifestyle and financial changes -- especially in decision-making -- in order to be successful. It's a good thing, because the habits cultivated by those changes outlast your case.
Sounds like you have the opportunity to hone your decision-making skills immediately. I hope what may seem like 'for worse' now comes to appear 'for better' down the road.
Impossible to be very helpful without knowing some specifics, like your current cash resources (if any), purpose of tuition, et al, but I'll attempt some suggestions anyway (which you may not like):

• the easiest one seems to be the cross-country funeral trip -- don't go. You say, "...we need to go..." This would be a really good time to examine your personal definitions for 'need' and 'want'. Now, perhaps this cousin was really like a sister to you, but probably not. In that case, I don't think anyone can reasonably blame you for not spending short-notice, high-cost travel money for a relative the airlines don't consider close enough to offer discounted bereavement fares for. Unless the emotional catharsis factor of saying good-bye in person is paramount, I wouldn't even consider it.
• What/who is the tuition for? Is it for education that can be put off -- at least until you can find scholarship/grant/gift money to help defray it? If you're not going to see a short-term financial benefit from it -- as in, a new job, or better-paying promotion -- it just might have to wait.
• Fix the car problem! To me, this is the no-brainer priority in this list. It's your ticket to work, school, etc. When you say it 'died', did it throw a piston or something? I know $1,500 relative to auto expenses isn't that much these days, but is it possible to cobble together a temporary repair for less, or use that money toward a more reliable vehicle? Consider ALL options.
• Take care of the kids! Co-priority, and yet another reason NOT to spend money on unbudgeted travel and/or non-critical tuition. Although Chapter 13 generally allows new debt for medical reasons, you need to keep enough resources in hand to pay for doctor visits and medicines. Don't give short-shrift (and I'm sure you won't!) to your kids'/family's medical needs. Keep all y'all as healthy as possible.

Granted, mine is one person's take -- and one not in your precise position, at that. I'm sure others will offer more and better solutions. The biggest thing, though, is to make decisions that will promote the success of your repayment plan. You will invest too much in it, and receive too much benefit from its completion, to be sidetracked by anything that isn't critical to you and your family's personal well-being. And the empowerment of learning and knowing how to make those decisions will last years beyond discharge.
Best of luck, both tomorrow and over the next few years.

[flower04]

Thanks-
We pretty much decided that we can't attend the funeral. I was requested to be there to perform a musical number by my cousin, who I was close with growing up, but haven't seen much of in about 4 years. So that gets crossed off teh list.

The tuition has to be figured out. We have this one last term until my husband graduates from Graduate school. We are trying to work with the financial aid department to figure something out.

The car needed to be fixed about 2 months ago, got an estimate of over $3k and found someone to do it for about 1/2 but haven't had the resources to cover the expense. I'll have to figure out how to do what I need to do and have my husband take my car to work (40 miles comute one way) until we can get it fixed.

We have been living on cash only for almost 2 years and have been able to get by, I know we'll figure something out, just haven't figured out what yet. Any suggestions would be great.