Finally decided to start posting.
The 341 meeting was on 5-19 and it was pretty painless. We did our debtor education the same day with a live person, it went well.
I guess I'll give some back story just in case there is anything helpfull in there.
I work in retail management and was in that position when I got my first credit card. It was a secured card and that was about 8 years ago. I was in my early 20's making a lot more money than I needed and spending it irresponsibly. between that time and when I got married I racked up about a 1000 to 1500 in credit card debt. It didn't seem like a big deal when I was making 50K a year and was single. Then I got married and bought a house. My wife brought some debt to the marriage also, 15k in student loans, 1k in cc debt. she also had a 1 year old child who knows only me as dad. Her debt was a lot more understandable than mine. Anyway after about 2 years we had our second child and we were in a position to pay off all of our unsecured debt (about 8K at the time). Instead I took what i thought was going to be a promotion at work, the catch: I had to relocate. So over time we used the money for moving, rent furniture etc.. Oh yeah, the killer is I had to make the decision when I had a 103.5 fever! Anyway I made a very bad decision, we didn't sell the house and 8 months of paying utilities for two homes making less money (yes less) pretty much killed us financially. we had to use credit cards for all our needs and the occasional wants. So I requested transfer back to something closer to home. I got it but it was 60 miles from my house. And it was another pay cut. The other problem we have always had is that my job had been primarily performance based so it was really hard for me to consider the possibility of being bankrupt. I always thought that if I could have a good year we could catch up, even after our income fell below our neccesary expenses. So I worked my way back to better pay but still have the expense of travel. My wife even went back to work full time, but after 7 months we had spent more on daycare and medical costs (even though I have good insurance) then what she was bringing home. Finally, about the same time she left her job my company changed my payplan. The result was a higher salary but a reduced and capped performance payplan. After about a month of crunching numbers I realized we were bankrupt. there was no way I could ever earn enough to pay our bills and even the minnimum payments on over 40K in cc bills and 10k in medical bills.
Looking back... As I began researching bankruptcy I recalled the countless times my wife had suggested considering it over the past few years. I would always brush her off with my optimism, pride and stubborn tenacity. I even felt disgusted with her after she would bring it up. I feel so bad now for the way I would react to her, she was right, I was ignorant.
So we filed in april after a lot of research . Our 341 was 5-19 and it was mostly painless. the trustee took issue with us paaying ahead on our mortgage with our income tax money. Fortunately our lawyer (well worth the $800 which included the filing fee) was there to rescue us from our panic. Yesterday PACER showed the trustee requesting discharge with no distribution, so now we wait. More importantly I have taken responsibility for our budget moving forward. I keep track and make final decisions but my wife is included in what's going on and the decision process. In the past she had been responsible for it but she has little spare time or energy chasing two kids around, and we have a third on the way. So it looks like, if discharged, we will be okay. I use quicken and check our account balances every day to stay on top of things. I also am budgeting 6 months in advance. My goal is to build up a savings of at least $1500 in the next 9 months. This is going to be very difficult to do.
Anyway, I want to thank all of you that contribute to this forum. You have helped us so much over the past few months, It's so nice to know we are not alone. I really felt like a scum bag when we decided to file. But seeing how caring and sincere the members of this community are has really helped me get over that. I know I work hard, I try my best to support my family, and I make mistakes... I suppose I'm human. That is nothing for us to be ashamed of.
The 341 meeting was on 5-19 and it was pretty painless. We did our debtor education the same day with a live person, it went well.
I guess I'll give some back story just in case there is anything helpfull in there.
I work in retail management and was in that position when I got my first credit card. It was a secured card and that was about 8 years ago. I was in my early 20's making a lot more money than I needed and spending it irresponsibly. between that time and when I got married I racked up about a 1000 to 1500 in credit card debt. It didn't seem like a big deal when I was making 50K a year and was single. Then I got married and bought a house. My wife brought some debt to the marriage also, 15k in student loans, 1k in cc debt. she also had a 1 year old child who knows only me as dad. Her debt was a lot more understandable than mine. Anyway after about 2 years we had our second child and we were in a position to pay off all of our unsecured debt (about 8K at the time). Instead I took what i thought was going to be a promotion at work, the catch: I had to relocate. So over time we used the money for moving, rent furniture etc.. Oh yeah, the killer is I had to make the decision when I had a 103.5 fever! Anyway I made a very bad decision, we didn't sell the house and 8 months of paying utilities for two homes making less money (yes less) pretty much killed us financially. we had to use credit cards for all our needs and the occasional wants. So I requested transfer back to something closer to home. I got it but it was 60 miles from my house. And it was another pay cut. The other problem we have always had is that my job had been primarily performance based so it was really hard for me to consider the possibility of being bankrupt. I always thought that if I could have a good year we could catch up, even after our income fell below our neccesary expenses. So I worked my way back to better pay but still have the expense of travel. My wife even went back to work full time, but after 7 months we had spent more on daycare and medical costs (even though I have good insurance) then what she was bringing home. Finally, about the same time she left her job my company changed my payplan. The result was a higher salary but a reduced and capped performance payplan. After about a month of crunching numbers I realized we were bankrupt. there was no way I could ever earn enough to pay our bills and even the minnimum payments on over 40K in cc bills and 10k in medical bills.
Looking back... As I began researching bankruptcy I recalled the countless times my wife had suggested considering it over the past few years. I would always brush her off with my optimism, pride and stubborn tenacity. I even felt disgusted with her after she would bring it up. I feel so bad now for the way I would react to her, she was right, I was ignorant.
So we filed in april after a lot of research . Our 341 was 5-19 and it was mostly painless. the trustee took issue with us paaying ahead on our mortgage with our income tax money. Fortunately our lawyer (well worth the $800 which included the filing fee) was there to rescue us from our panic. Yesterday PACER showed the trustee requesting discharge with no distribution, so now we wait. More importantly I have taken responsibility for our budget moving forward. I keep track and make final decisions but my wife is included in what's going on and the decision process. In the past she had been responsible for it but she has little spare time or energy chasing two kids around, and we have a third on the way. So it looks like, if discharged, we will be okay. I use quicken and check our account balances every day to stay on top of things. I also am budgeting 6 months in advance. My goal is to build up a savings of at least $1500 in the next 9 months. This is going to be very difficult to do.
Anyway, I want to thank all of you that contribute to this forum. You have helped us so much over the past few months, It's so nice to know we are not alone. I really felt like a scum bag when we decided to file. But seeing how caring and sincere the members of this community are has really helped me get over that. I know I work hard, I try my best to support my family, and I make mistakes... I suppose I'm human. That is nothing for us to be ashamed of.
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