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    freaking out

    Hi guys, I haven't been here in quite awhile, but I could really use some encouragement right now. I know no one can solve my problems but I just need to vent.

    We are just over a year out of BK7 and have managed to screw up our finances yet again. It's actually not CC debt - we've been careful about that - it's everything else.

    We had to buy two cars, one during the BK because we surrendered ours, and another because I finished school and started working full-time. We are now spending $1000/month on car payments and insurance. Of course we owe more than the cars are worth, so selling one or both and buying cheaper cars is not an option. We have to have reliable vehicles because my commute is 90 miles/day and my husband's is about 40.

    Our house payment is $500/month. Not much we can do there. We had a storm that damaged our roof, but insurance won't pay because the roof is old and needed replacement before the storm. I now have a leaking ceiling in one bedroom and in the bathroom, where the drywall is absolutely ruined because of the water (and now mold is starting). We desperately need to replace the roof and gut our bathroom, but yeah right.

    My student loan payments are $500/month. One of them is a private loan that is absolutely sucking me dry. I've been paying on it for 4 years and the principal balance is only $400 less than it was when I took out the loan. They raised my interest rate to 18% when we filed BK and there isn't much I can do except keep paying it on time.

    Gas prices are eating us alive, of course. Both of our cars get good mileage (close to 30 mpg) but we are spending several hundred dollars each month filling up our cars. Moving closer to one job would be moving away from the other, plus we can't sell our house in the condition it's in. Groceries are killing us too, despite using coupons, buying off-brand items, planning meals, and cutting back on pre-prepared dinners or luxuries.

    Add in our utilities and our one CC with a balance (less than $300), and we are spending every single dime we make. We have no savings and no money for entertainment - we can't even afford to rent a movie once or twice a month. I thought BK was going to fix all this!

    To make matters worse, there was a problem with our bank account last month and our house payment bounced. We didn't realize it until we got our statement, by which time the next payment was almost due. So now the mortgage company wants to work out a payment arrangement but we can't afford to pay any more than we already pay! We have never missed a house payment or even been late in 4 years, and I'm terrified that our credit is going to be even worse as a result of this.

    We looked at either me or my husband taking on a second job, but more gas, wear and tear on vehicles, child care costs, etc. would keep it from really being helpful unless one of us could make a billion dollars a year. In our chosen professions, working two jobs isn't the best idea anyway, and I had to sign a non-compete clause. So I couldn't take any jobs in my line of work, and answering phones or working at Wal-Mart isn't enough money to be worth it.

    I just feel so hopeless. We make decent money now, which was most of our problem before as we lived on one income. We have really tried to learn from past mistakes and avoid spending more than we have. We got CCs to rebuild credit and have paid them off every single month, with the exception of the one CC balance that we're paying off with our tax rebate. Still, I feel like we've made all the wrong decisions and will never have any more than we have right now. I forgot how easily suicide starts to seem like a good idea when your finances are in ruins. Not that I'm planning to hurt myself, because I'm not, but sometimes I feel like that's the only way out of the mess we've made. I just don't know what we can do....

    I apologize for the crazy length here; just needed to get this out.
    Filed Chapter 7: 9/29/06
    341 Meeting: 11/01/06
    Last Day for Objections: 1/01/07
    Discharged and closed: 1/03/07

    #2
    Even though a part-time job that doesn't pay much doesn't seem like it would help, it's extra money. What about cleaning houses? Working at the grocery store? I work concessions at a few of the local venues here and while the hours aren't long and the paychecks aren't huge, I also get tips and that helps tremendously. We keep all my tip money in a huge jar on the counter and it has saved our butt more than once when we needed a few groceries or the kids needed money for a field trip at school. When you're in over your head, even a little extra helps. I know that spending more time away from home, away from the kids or family, sucks, but what's the alternative? Getting farther and farther behind each month? Being scared and crabby and never having the money to do anything?

    I know you said that everything looks helpless, and I've been there myself, but you are the only one who can stop what's happening. Get mad enough to change things. Both you and your husband need to find ways to make extra money.... there are jobs you can do. You need to make a budget before the month starts and account for every penny you're going to spend and stick to it. Pay cash for everything.... if you only have $50 in your pocket when you go to the store, you live on mac n cheese for the week.

    BK can't fix spending habits. My husband and I took out a HELOC about ten years ago to get everything paid off, make a fresh start, blah, blah, blah.... and guess what? We didn't change our spending and ended up owing double - the HELOC and new balances on the cards. We were able to get out of that by selling the house, getting everything paid off, and stupid us, did it again. Sometimes it takes a really big brick to get a message accross to me! LOL

    I hope you figure out what works best for you and your family.... you really can turn things around!
    ann

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