Stress? How do you deal with it?

[One Half Full]

Everyone deals with stress differently. Some totally turn off, some stress to the point of mental and physical illness, like ulcers, or high BP, depression... Some become obsessive about some things, some over drink or eat. Good mental health really is the key to decent physical health (my opinion). I'm not saying I was a psychiatric patient but I think there are many kinds of mental illness that can be gotten over by simply changing the environment. Running away is sometimes the best thing that can happen to a person in a stressed out situation. In fact, I think it is a natural thing to leave when you feel your life/ livelihood or family is threatened. A happy person lives in a world that causes happiness (less stress, loved ones, healthy lifestyle, optimistic outlook).

How do you deal with stress? Especially where it relates to the BK or Foreclosure.

I think I first became depressed as I was unable to pay my bills more and more since the broken leg in 2005. I still trusted that tomorrow things would get better, and I would get a better job, or a raise, or something that would magically help me out.

It was gradual but I started to drink a lot more than usual, and slept almost all day (so as not to use any extra supplies), my attitude was terrible at work. I think I stopped taking care of myself. One moment I would drift into depression (crying at work and so on) next, I would freak out. I was very bitter about my financial situation. If this had been the French Revolution, I would be first in line to behead any Capitalist or rich person I caught. I was also quite jealous of anyone who had anything new or nice, feeling that they had gotten it unfairly (sorry, just trying to be truthful here).

After deciding to go Bk, I have had a bit of adjustment to do. I am cleaning the house, amazed by the stuff I ignored. I've given a lot of junk to charity in an effort to manage my living conditions better. I started to take care of myself more, concentrating (this is still going on) on filling my cabinets with spare food, and other things I have denied myself, like clothes-- just the basics, and not much, but being able to afford decent work shoes is nice.

Has anyone else fallen into the stress pit and dragged themselves out?

[Bandit]

Everyone deals with stress differently. Some totally turn off, some stress to the point of mental and physical illness, like ulcers, or high BP, depression... Some become obsessive about some things, some over drink or eat. Good mental health really is the key to decent physical health (my opinion). I'm not saying I was a psychiatric patient but I think there are many kinds of mental illness that can be gotten over by simply changing the environment. Running away is sometimes the best thing that can happen to a person in a stressed out situation. In fact, I think it is a natural thing to leave when you feel your life/ livelihood or family is threatened. A happy person lives in a world that causes happiness (less stress, loved ones, healthy lifestyle, optimistic outlook).

Some good honest stuff here

I started looking to move away at first. My entire mental state has changed & I am very hard man these days. I slowly brought myself out of this a little & bought myself a handful of things that I had always wanted & though they Are material things they do make me happy. I also took three trips to see family & that helped me out a lot. I have had many many suicidal thoughts over the last few months but am not thinking that way recently.

How do you deal with stress? Especially where it relates to the BK or Foreclosure.

I think I first became depressed as I was unable to pay my bills more and more since the broken leg in 2005. I still trusted that tomorrow things would get better, and I would get a better job, or a raise, or something that would magically help me out.

Depression & Denial. I call myself the fat old gray man who has nothing & who is a worthless slob. I do not think much of myself these days & have very low self esteem. Work has decreased from 40 hours to 25 hours due to economy though is due to pick up any day now. That is not helping matters.

It was gradual but I started to drink a lot more than usual, and slept almost all day (so as not to use any extra supplies), my attitude was terrible at work. I think I stopped taking care of myself. One moment I would drift into depression (crying at work and so on) next, I would freak out. I was very bitter about my financial situation. If this had been the French Revolution, I would be first in line to behead any Capitalist or rich person I caught. I was also quite jealous of anyone who had anything new or nice, feeling that they had gotten it unfairly (sorry, just trying to be truthful here).

I also found myself nipping at the B&B more often than ususal, in fact added that to my grocery list!! I cried constantly but have not cried for a couple of months-not sure why. I was frustrated to see everyone else around me prosper & moving forward while my life had come to a complete stop for many months. They have no idea what it is like until they actually go thru it. It also reminded me that we end up with very few true friends through things like a BK since a BK brings you all the way down to zero.

After deciding to go Bk, I have had a bit of adjustment to do. I am cleaning the house, amazed by the stuff I ignored. I've given a lot of junk to charity in an effort to manage my living conditions better. I started to take care of myself more, concentrating (this is still going on) on filling my cabinets with spare food, and other things I have denied myself, like clothes-- just the basics, and not much, but being able to afford decent work shoes is nice.

Adjusting a little different than you as one of my friends has taken me to see the Thunder over Louisville which is something I have always wanted to see & then the same friend is also offering me a day trip to one other huge fireworks display in May. I have not had to pay for any of this. This getting away from these horrid surroundings was what I really needed to do. I bought myself health insurance that I will be using soon. I also charged 300 dollars a few months ago to renew my gym membership for 3 years & have been using the gym 2 to 3 days a week & it does make a difference on how I feel about myself. I used to be an avid weight lifter but kind of lost interest for awhile. I aslo bought myself a new pair of shoes. I stopped drinking soda pop & now as my daily beverage drink hot green tea- BOY! has that made a big difference for the better.

I am facing my debt head on very soon, while at the same moment have put it to the back of my mind to not allow it to drag me down any farther than it already has. Almost like Nirvana at times & I have no idea how I got there.

Has anyone else fallen into the stress pit and dragged themselves out?

My biggest beef over all of it was that I had finally gotten myself into a great position to where I was going to be able to purchase a few nice things for myself and get a small mortgage-THEN!! BAM!! right smack on my face with nothing to show for myself. That has the been the hardest part to deal with.

I am not sure I am totally out of the stress pit yet but definately not as scared & down on myself as I used to be. One thing that I believe really helped is I was determined NOT to lay down & die just because my future may hold a BK. I told myself I will live as I have always lived & do the important things I need to survive as always. Looking back at the row, I am glad I did not totally give up on myself-not yet anyway. Now that spring is here it is making a huge difference and making me feel great but at times, deep inside I still hate my life and I never had that type of creepy feeling until after my accident. I guess it really takes us a very long time to heal. I am seeing more questions than answers and finding that to be, ok.

[Bandit]

oh one other thing, I kept wondering why the BOA statement seemed to be late coming in the mail. I had placed it on a different desk while forgetting & found it two weeks after it was due!!! LOL I found it & normally I would have totally freaked out but just tossed them into a box for all the bills & said, "OH WELL"

I was waiting for that day to happen & was going to do it willfully but had no idea it would be because I forgot to pay it. I am still laughing my ass off about that...so I must be doing a little better coming out of the stress. We shall see what the future holds.

[twuoo]

Exercise releases endorphines...a mental high you can get and it makes your body feel good and lifts your mood. You don't even have to do anything strenuous.

Just get out and walk. Sit somewhere quite and stretch. Go to the library and browse at all the free magazines.

I work on my feet all day lifting heavy stuff and bending and lifting....

I walk anywhere between 3 or more miles a day.

When I get home, I still sit down and do some stretches. If I have any energy left, I'll lift some weights. Tire myself out and stay conditioned.

I went to the doctors the other day and the nurse weighed me and said "wow, you're really fit." That was a nice boost to my self esteem.

I'm glad that this year has been better for me than last year in terms of personal tumoil.

I'm still stressed to the gill,but I've been handling it better. Though I still get sick alot because I work in a hospital where there are zillions of germs.

Last year, I had it where it was hard just to breath. All I wanted to do was lay on the couch or not even get out of bed. If I did manage to get out of bed and shower, I'd go back into my room for clothes and see my bed and just lay down again. It was aweful. Still, I managed to get to work, if not for myself, than for my child and pets.

Even if the credit card bills were no longer being paid, I still had daily living expenses that needed to be met...groceries, gas, living etc

So I just pushed myself.

Some days, it's still difficult to get out of bed. But each day gets a tiny baby step better.

One thing for sure, if you eat crappy, then that is how you'll feel. Garbage in, garbage out. Treat yourself good and you'll be happier with yourself when somebody notices you and says "wow, you did something great"!

Exercise. It doesn't cost anything to stretch or walk. So don't come up with excuses. ;)

If you really want to lift your spirits, then volunteer to help out with somebody in need. Volunteer to help a child read, or to visit a lonely senior, or work at the local humane society. You will see that sometimes people have it worse off than you do, but they still can maintain a sense of calm. You will be thankful that you aren't walking in their shoes.

[PaKettle]

They say that the act of smiling - even fake smiling, forced smiling - causes positive mental changes.

When I am in a bad mood I love watching a good comedy. I keep some comedy dvd's on hand for that purpose. Or you can usually find re-runs of a good comedy on tv.

Exercise is a great stress buster, as is meditation. Meditation doesn't have to be formal meditation - it can also be just taking a walk - more so if you can walk in a nice place with trees, creek, birds, etc...

Alcohol and pot can be good stress busters temporarily, but they don't last and after the effect wears off, there you are back where you started.

Doing anything you enjoy doing - listening to a favorite cd, watching a favorite comedy or uplifting movie, talking to an old friend, etc. - is a good way to beat stress and stop worrying about bankrutpcy.

Oh, and sex is always good! ;-)

[systemslt]

that about how i felt too.

except the part about wanting to "behead any Capitalist or rich person" they had nothing to do with how i got into financial trouble.

[JRScott]

I don't handle stress very well. I allowed my mounting debt to really hurt me physically and mentally. I suffered severe depression in 2004 through early 2007. I put on a lot of weight during this time too (around 60 pounds or so).

I had considered filing bankruptcy in 2005, I realized then I was not going to be able to make it. However I struggled with the idea. I felt it was wrong to do so, I wanted to pay back the debt. I just could find no way, so I struggled for a couple of years. Finally after much prayer in early 2007, I came to the conclusion that bankruptcy was the best solution for me before my mental and physical health got even worse.