Christmas presents

[okiemom2008]

Hi everyone. I have a big dilemma. We are going to my husbands grandmas house for Christmas because we finally live within driving distance to her and probably won't after this year. Problem is, our next paycheck every single dime is going to our car payment even though we are giving our car up in the bk. We are not filing until Jan. They are going to repo it if we dont come up with 750.00 by Friday. And then I have my cell phone who is going to cut me off Friday and our house payment that is only 400 but 2 months past due.

So basically, I am just thinking of using my dillards card to get everyone 20.00 gifts. That would add up to like probably 100-150 dollars total. It has 350.00 on it right now. Since I have not filed, could I just try and pay that 150 off before we file and not the 350? The 350 was from purchases in August. Would this be fraud? I just dont want to show up without any gifts and get tons of gifts from family and I dont want to explain to everyone that we are going to file bk because it is extended family. Also, we owe his dad 200.00 and he will be there and I dont want to look cheap/. I am freaking out thinking of skipping out because of this. what should i do

[d80indebt]

Oh, my. I wouldn't do it. That way of thinking is probably part of what got you into this mess in the first place.

[okiemom2008]

Oh, my. I wouldn't do it. That way of thinking is probably part of what got you into this mess in the first place.

So what do I do? Just show up without gifts? I think I am just going to not go because it stresses me out to get things but not give.

[d80indebt]

Well, we're making Christmas gifts this year. And we told our families that we'd like the same from them. Also, we owe father roughly $1800 that we will not be paying. It's about stopping for us. Bankruptcy is not about getting a free ride for us -- it's about learning from our mistakes and going forward. A fresh start. To use money that we don't have would be a big no-no.

Maybe it's different for you and your family. It's up to you. But I wouldn't.

[yellowstone]

So what do I do? Just show up without gifts? I think I am just going to not go because it stresses me out to get things but not give.

i wouldn't make the car payment. since you are going to give it up anyway, that makes no sense. you can get a beater for 750 that you would own free and clear.

i think your husband also needs to have a talk with his dad. you guys can't both spend 750 on a car payment and pay him back but maybe you could drive over there ahead of time and trade cars until after the holidays? you don't want to be hiding the fact that you are bankrupt ... they may be willing to help you and spending money trying not to look cheap when you are broke is a good way to go nuts. for presents this year we are doing lots of baked stuff, might work for you.

[okiemom2008]

Well, we're making Christmas gifts this year. And we told our families that we'd like the same from them. Also, we owe father roughly $1800 that we will not be paying. It's about stopping for us. Bankruptcy is not about getting a free ride for us -- it's about learning from our mistakes and going forward. A fresh start. To use money that we don't have would be a big no-no.

Maybe it's different for you and your family. It's up to you. But I wouldn't.

I could skip my cingular cell phone payment but our phones would be shut off. It would give me an extra 230.00 or I could skip our house payment but that would put us 3 months behind instead of two. I don't know. I could use the card and then pay it back on the next payday but not sure if the trustee would wonder why I only paid back that part and not the August purchases. I am retaining the lawyer on the 7th of Jan

[okiemom2008]

i wouldn't make the car payment. since you are going to give it up anyway, that makes no sense. you can get a beater for 750 that you would own free and clear.

i think your husband also needs to have a talk with his dad. you guys can't both spend 750 on a car payment and pay him back but maybe you could drive over there ahead of time and trade cars until after the holidays? you don't want to be hiding the fact that you are bankrupt ... they may be willing to help you and spending money trying not to look cheap when you are broke is a good way to go nuts. for presents this year we are doing lots of baked stuff, might work for you.

Well the only reason I have to pay the car payment is because that will keep us up to date until the 9th of Jan. and it is our only car and my husband works everyday. Also, it is 5 hours to his grandparents house and 10 to his dads. But everyone is planning it around us coming and doing it when we can get a day off work.

I got my car company to let us skip our november payment and they agreed finally so I got a whole month free and just trying to suck it up and pay it because I cannot even find a running car for 1000 much less 750

Thanks for the advice though...What kind of things can you make? I can make like photo books but they still cost a little bit of money plus what would I get for the men? My husband could make jerky I guess but not sure if that is a good idea or not.

[dingdong]

Give them "Gift Certificates" for some work you could do for them.

CLean their house

Detail their car.

Help organize their garage.

Anything you know they might need help with.

Tell them money is tight and that is it, they will understand.

Christmas isn't about gifts, I am sure they would much rather have you there than skip out and not see you.

Christmas is about love and family, the Birth of Jesus ( if you are religious)

Give them the gift of enjoying you and your family, relax while you are there and forget about the BK for a few days.

Its gonna get better!

[okiemom2008]

Give them "Gift Certificates" for some work you could do for them.

CLean their house

Detail their car.

Help organize their garage.

Anything you know they might need help with.

Tell them money is tight and that is it, they will understand.

Christmas isn't about gifts, I am sure they would much rather have you there than skip out and not see you.

Christmas is about love and family, the Birth of Jesus ( if you are religious)

Give them the gift of enjoying you and your family, relax while you are there and forget about the BK for a few days.

Its gonna get better!

That makes sense. It is just that we live so far away that the gift card would not work. I found some pic frames for 7.00 each so I am thinking just doing a family gift and trying to find some money for the 3 little kids to get them a toy each.

I hope that we can make it to see them. Thanks for the help!

[dingdong]

No, Not a gift card, just print up some cute gift certificates that say 'This Gift Certificate Good for One Car Detailing " or possibly some other skill you may have., while you are there, you will do some nice littlle helpful job for them.

If someone wanted to detail my car for Christmas, that would be like a 1000.00 gift !

Just do something sweet and something they need, like clean the garage, just explain that while you don't have money for gifts right now, you want to do something special to help them out , out of your time and energy.

One Xmas, I was flat broke, I went and scanned a bunch of old pictures of my mom and my aunt and put them in a collage frame.

She absolutely loved it and still has it hanging. They were all black and white and I put it in this cool shadowboz frame I found at a antique store for under 20.00