Our story and several questions

[SadandAshamed]

My husband filed 8 years ago when he was single (in CA).

2007 was horrible for us. Our child was born premature, spent time in NICU, I was still ill & recovering for several months after the birth. We made the choice to stop paying our credit cards in 2007 to keep paying our mortgage and other bills (gas, food, insurance, etc)

Bottom line - we know we got in over our heads with our mortgage payment and credit cards. We are so ashamed as we should be. My husband is especially ashamed since he made this mistake before. We didn't have a savings or cushion in case of an emergency and didn't forsee me having such serious health problems.

So, now the questions.

How difficult will it be for us to file (in CA) since he has previously filed?



Credit Collectors are calling his work and harrassing his coworkers - is there anything we can do to stop this?

We *think* they are now coming to our home. Someone has been seen pounding on our front door for 20+ mins at a time - could they be "serving us" with some sort of court papers? If so, what?

Will we have any warning before they attach our checking account or garnish wages?

Can they take our home?


We have been trying to contact attorneys to answer questions, but have been unsuccessful so far.


I would be so grateful for any help or advice.

[HHM]

How difficult will it be for us to file (in CA) since he has previously filed?

Not at all difficult, if he filed 8 years ago, there should be no problem.

Also, need a rec for an attorney in San Diego.

Can't help you on that one.

Credit Collectors are calling his work and harassing his coworkers - is there anything we can do to stop this?

Depends on who, exactly, is calling; the original creditor or a collection agency. Search our "Collection Problems" forum as there are tons of post that deal with how to handle calls.

We *think* they are now coming to our home. Someone has been seen pounding on our front door for 20+ mins at a time - could they be "serving us" with some sort of court papers? If so, what?

Possibly, who can really say until you actually talk to the guy. But being sued is not the end of the world
Read...http://www.bkforum.com/showthread.php?t=20104

Will we have any warning before they attach our checking account or garnish wages?

Yes...read http://www.bkforum.com/showthread.php?t=18889

Can they take our home?

If you owe more than it is worth, no one but the mortgage company can take your home. However, it sounds like your home is the crux of your financial difficulties, so you may need to make the tough choice to let it go. especially if you are upside down by $100K...it will take YEARS to recoup that. You are going to be actually financially better off renting for a couple years and buying while the market is somewhat depressed, vs. trying to dig out of the negative equity.

We have been trying to contact attorneys to answer questions, but have been unsuccessful so far.

Attorneys' offices are NOT legal clinics that you can just call and ask questions. You will have to schedule a consultation; bankruptcy consultations are usually free but you will, typically, have to go to the office and meet with the attorney. If you are serious about BK, you will want to schedule consultations with about 3-4 attorneys.

[SadandAshamed]

Thank you very much for all of the information.

[Flamingo]

So, now the questions.

How difficult will it be for us to file (in CA) since he has previously filed?

Should not be difficult at all due to the time lapse since his last filing.

Credit Collectors are calling his work and harrassing his coworkers - is there anything we can do to stop this? We *think* they are now coming to our home. Someone has been seen pounding on our front door for 20+ mins at a time - could they be "serving us" with some sort of court papers? If so, what?
Will we have any warning before they attach our checking account or garnish wages?

The credit folks are just doing their jobs and trying to get money as awful as it is for you and your hubby. Depending on what you want to do as to filing BK, there are a few ways to handle the calls. They are also trying to contact you either via mail or via delivery of letters trying to get you to pay the bills. You will be served with papers either via mail or by server as to going to court when they sue you for nonpayment and seek a judgment.

Can they take our home?

If you don't make your mortgage payments, your mortgagor can start foreclosure proceedings. Creditors could have judgments placed against your home so that if you sell it in the future, that judgment would have to be paid.

We have been trying to contact attorneys to answer questions, but have been unsuccessful so far.

The only way to find out your options as to how to handle all this and what to do is to have a consultation with a BK attorney. Most give free initial consultations. If you are confused where to start, look in your phone book under the "state" section, find your State Bar Assoc. and call them and ask for some names of good BK attorneys in your area. I don't suggest going to any of the places that advertise on TV or any of the "Discount" legal places advertising throughout the phone book. Call and make an appointment and you and your husband take with you a complete listing of all your debts, monthly payments, sources of income, paystubs, asset listing and your most recent filed tax returns. You will be advised on where you stand and what you can or cannot do.

Best of luck to you and I hope things start looking up for you soon!

[Phillymanhere]

It's time for you guys to schedule meetings/consultations with attorneys.

Meeting with attorneys can be extremely helpful emotionally. It gets you out of all the nebulous fear and gets you direct answers from people who know the law.

Just setting up the appointments and driving to them helped me to burn off some of my fear and paralysis.

You may wanna take all the details of how much you owe and all of that to the attorney ... but get going. It's actually quite therapeutic as you'll see that most bk attorneys are not judgmental at all. Their job is to help people who've made financial mistakes.

Word to the hubby: I can see how he would be bummed. But I hope he doesn't get into the "something's wrong with me" thing. That is unhelpful. He needs to look at what he's doing wrong FINANCIALLY. You guys don't need to attack yourselves--start studying so you can figure out where you guys tend to go wrong financially. Yes, this is difficult because sometimes money problems (often) are related to personality issues, spending problems, addictions of various kinds. But sometimes just bad luck figures in. Bad luck and not being super rich. But remember: even rich folks declare bk.

Good luck--you guys can learn from this and get to a better place financially.

[rfassett]

You have been given some excellent advice. Let me just add that you need to change your user name if that is a reflection of how you feel about life. Sit up straight, take a deep breath, this is nothing that you should beat yourselves up over. The damage is done. Now you need to figure out how to fix it. You are on the right path. Do what you have to do, and move on. And do not think for a moment that your baby does not feel your stress. That should be motivation enough right there to pursue this to the end.

[Cali]

I agree the information you have been given is great. Take a deep breath and go from there.

Good luck!!