A son trying to help his dad

[dadson]

Hi All,

I'm new to the forum. I feel I need some help because the issue has become unbearable. Here's the story:

My dad hasn't really been working for over a year and a half. In the last two months, he took out like $30,000 in cash advance, and gambled it away. He's asking me for help. He's living in my place right now, and currently I'm helping him pay for his minimal payments. I don't think I can help him much longer. He's trying to look for jobs, but they are hard to come by. He does not have any property, or even own a car. He's in his 50's now and has chronic body ache. Should I tell him to file for bankruptcy? Even so, what's the chance that these debts would be discharged? And would my dad's filing for bankruptcy affect my mom in any way? All the loans are under my dad's name. What should I do?

[keepmine]

First of all, stop making those card payments for your father. Keep a roof over his head and food on the table until he gets a job-any sort of job.
Bk will discharge those debts but if he took $30K in cash advances over 2 months, he'll need to put a year betwen those advances and filing if he wants to minimize the chances of a creditor objecting to discharge.

[dingdong]

Balance transfers and cash advances need to have a little time between the date the BT/CA was taken and the date of filing. If he is making payments on the BTs , that is a good thing as it shows that your dad was intent on paying back the debt.

The best thing he could do right now is

1) Ban himself ( your dad) from the casinos he visits. The casino will not let him in for as long as the self imposed ban is in place. Although this may seem harsh, it will keep him from spending any more money at the casino while he deals with his gambling habit. Not passing judgement, just know a friend who had a bad gambling habit and they had themselves banned ( It is actually called "self excluded" I believe. They lost their house, everything, so it can get really out of hand.


2) Have your dad talk to 3-4 BK attorneys for free consults, they will know the district ins and outs and be able to tell him whether he qualifies for ch 7 or 13 and the best way to plan his BK if that is the way he should go.


If he doesn't deal with his gambling issue, things won't change much after BK, unfortunately.

It is not the end of the world, and there is life after BK, so stay positive with him and support him as he faces these issues.

[relief13035]

NO child should have to be responsible for their parents gambling debts!!!

I agree with keepmine - provide shelter but do not pay his bills.

[Flamingo]

You need to make some phone calls. First call State Social Services and see if your dad would qualify for any aid (welfare, food stamps, Medicaid, etc.). Secondly, contact Gamblers Anonymous and get your dad in for their help and have him make some appointments for free consultations with a BK attorney and you go with him. Your dad is down and out and you need to help him get back on his feet before you go down with him financially due to trying to keep him afloat. Also, he needs to be evaluated by a doctor as to his "chronic body ache" but if he qualifies for state aid, they could set up an exam for him since it appears he has no medical insurance.

You need to make these calls cause you can be sure he won't - best of luck to both of you.

[dingdong]

Forum members:

Don't you think that perhaps the BTs may have a better chance of excaping an Adversrial Proceeding if the debtor made a few payments to the CC that the cash advances were taken on?

Since the TT may ask , "What did you do with the 30,000.00? And since "Dad" was insolvent when he took the advances, paying a bit on the debt may actually be a good thing if he is trying to discharge the debt.

This is where an experienced BK attorney would know the answers. OP, I would make appoinments ASAP with a BK attorney and just be very honest about the circumstances. Before you stop paying on the debt, talk to the attorney. A few payments MIGHT, and I emphasize MIGHT make a difference in whether a creditor succesfully objects to the discharge or not.


Just a thought.
DD

[dadson]

Thanks for all your help.
I didn't know you can get free consultations. How much does does bankruptcy cost including legal and other fees?

[dingdong]

Yep, first consults are free-yay!

It depends on your case/where you live, but for a CH 7 I would guesstimate 1500-2500.00 ish.

It is important to shop around and perhaps get referrals from other people who may have used a particular BK attorney. Stay away from the big BK mills. Ask the attorney you interview if he will be attending the 341 himself or sending a sub attorney. And one caveat, cheaper isn't always a better deal when it comes to BK attorneys.

Plus, read read read this forum, that way you can go into the consults with knowledge and specific questions as they deal with your dads particular circumstances. And don't be afraid to ask questions here, we are all here to help and are in the same "boat". No question is too embarassing or shameful, or "stupid" .

[dadson]

Thanks DD! Much appreciated. I'll keep these tips in mind as I browse through the forum.

[Flamingo]

Thanks for all your help.
I didn't know you can get free consultations. How much does does bankruptcy cost including legal and other fees?

If your dad has no income, he may qualify for legal aid to file. Reread my posting and contact your State Social services. Ask all the questions you can because I believe he will qualify for quite a bit and you need to get him help for his addiction and possible medical problems. Is there anyone else in your family that can help out?