What would you do in my situation?

[MEA2]

DH and I have been on the fence about filing for BK,we've been waiting until things have gotten desperate...that time has come

We have a mortgage of $250,000=$2000 month
Car payment balance $20,000=$550 a month(Kelly Blue Book lists it at $12,000 due to high mileage)
CC debt of $50,000 (MBNA&CITIBANK)

We are a family of 6 in a very expensive area of the country.He makes a good salary($100,000 a yr) but we've really messed up with the high interest debt.....
We are so scared to file.Is that the only option?(we can barely pay everything at the moment)
Help!

[SinkingFast]

Lay out all the month's bills and pay stubs. Add up what's coming in and what's going out. Allow for groceries, gasoline, and such that you HAVE to purchase every month. See where you are financially there.

If you haven't been, start saving all your receipts. Get your bank statements and look at them. If you use your Debit Card to pay things with, then you'll have a feel for how much you're spending for certain things.

Don't feel bad if you're like many of us. Grocery shop, swipe plastic. Get gas, swipe plastic. You do that so much that you don't know how much you're spending for anything.

Maybe contact a DOJ approved Credit Counseling Agency. Get a professional opinion of your situation. Sometimes outsiders can see areas to trim costs that we can't see.

http://www.usdoj.gov/ust/

In the BK Reform box, click on Credit Counseling and Debtor Education. Then select Credit Counseling. You'll find a list of approved agencies for your State. You can choose to go with a nationwide company. Or you might find a local office you can visit in person. See what they have to say.

Research and learn about BK. Call and schedule 2-3 Consults with BK attnys. Visit with them. Generally BK Consults are free and you'll learn a lot.

Look at all your options before you decide what will work best for you.

[lrprn]

SinkingFast has given you excellent advice, MEA2. One of the hardest parts of this journey is admitting to yourselves that you are losing ground and are going to crash eventually. It's painful to realize that you have overextended yourselves....frankly our current financial structures in this country make that exceedingly easy to do.

When my husband and I reached the point you have, we went back through our checkbook and credit card receipts for six months pulling out living expenses, loan payments, utilities, transportation, mortgages, etc. I categorized everything, then averaged to find out how much every month we were spending. We also starting keeping track of every penny we spent in cash. Putting that up against how much money we had available to pay everything, we found a considerable shortfall of several thousand dollars every single month. Even deleting the "extras" down to the bare minimum and just paying the minimums on our credit cards (which would mean we would never get ahead on them), we were still more than a $1,500/month short. It was time to start talking to bankruptcy lawyers. That was an incredibly bitter pill to swallow, but we did. If bankruptcy is the best option for your family, as hard as it is, it isn't the end of the world. And we'll be here to help answer questions and support you whenever you need it.

[MEA2]

SinkingFast has given you excellent advice, MEA2. One of the hardest parts of this journey is admitting to yourselves that you are losing ground and are going to crash eventually. It's painful to realize that you have overextended yourselves....frankly our current financial structures in this country make that exceedingly easy to do.

When my husband and I reached the point you have, we went back through our checkbook and credit card receipts for six months pulling out living expenses, loan payments, utilities, transportation, mortgages, etc. I categorized everything, then averaged to find out how much every month we were spending. We also starting keeping track of every penny we spent in cash. Putting that up against how much money we had available to pay everything, we found a considerable shortfall of several thousand dollars every single month. Even deleting the "extras" down to the bare minimum and just paying the minimums on our credit cards (which would mean we would never get ahead on them), we were still more than a $1,500/month short. It was time to start talking to bankruptcy lawyers. That was an incredibly bitter pill to swallow, but we did. If bankruptcy is the best option for your family, as hard as it is, it isn't the end of the world. And we'll be here to help answer questions and support you whenever you need it.

Thank you!You and SF have been very helpful in my information quest these past couple of months.We have seen 3 lawyers and that's where it gets confusing;
#1 said we'd have to do Chapter 13,7 would be too difficult,he seemed codecending and clueless.
#2 said "it's only $50,000 why don't you see if you can get a loan"(well that can't happen because of no equity or collateral no bank will loan us that much
#3 was extremely helpful,said he'd try for the 7 if we wanted,that it may be tough.complimented us on how smart we are lol(because of this board I knew what ?'s to ask,thanks guys!)

SF told me to try to see a trustee...I'm working on that now.I think it's just so daunting to realize we have to file.
What if we need to move due to a job change for dh?WE've considered trying to get out of this state because it's only getting more expensive,How will we be able to do so with BK on our credit report?

[lrprn]

What if we need to move due to a job change for dh?WE've considered trying to get out of this state because it's only getting more expensive,How will we be able to do so with BK on our credit report?

If you have to move during your bankruptcy, you notify your lawyer and he/she notifies your trustee and the court. If the move entails a significant increase or reduction in income and/or expenses, your plan may have to be amended to reflect that.

As far as moving with bankruptcy on your credit report, it does make things more difficult. Unless your trustee is willing to allow you to try for a home purchase, you may have to rent rather than buy. Be upfront about your bk - there are multiple stories scattered here on the forum about bad luck and good luck buying a new house or getting new rentals during Ch 13. Try a few forum searches to find them. Hang in there!

[SinkingFast]

If you move prior to filing BK, you'll have to live in the new State 6 months before most attnys will file for you. That's what we were told. Hubby had been here nearly a year when we started Consulting with attnys, but I hadn't been here 6 months yet. We were told then we'd have to wait until I hit the 6 month mark.

When you do file in a new State, you have to use Old State Exemptions. Which, from our experience, translates into higher attny's costs. The attny will have to research what your old State's Exemptions are and how they're applied. That added extra costs to our attny's fee. In the neighborhood of 3-4 billable hours extra.

A Credit/Background check for employment is a bridge you'll have to cross when you get to it.

You have to deal with today, today. Don't borrow trouble for tomorrow.

What is meant to be will be. If you don't get a job because of previous Credit, then there's a reason you weren't meant to be there. The right door that supposed to open will.

[FilingOnMyOwn]

Do you have home equity?