Moving to new state - experiences

[laurannm]

We are a family of five, currently living in MA. We didn't reaffirm our house and because we are so far upside down, combined with a large mortgage payment (plus would like our kids in a better school system then what we are in now), we are seriously considering walking away and finding a rental. Unfortunately most rentals in our area (while being much bigger houses) are about the same price as our mortgage today. Because MA is so expensive to live in, we are now considering moving out of state altogether. We have a lot of family that live very close to us now, so the thought of moving out of state is a little nerve racking.

Is there anyone out there who has moved out of state (and away from family) willing to share their experience? Was there any regrets or are you happy with the decision?


Thanks

[freedomnow7]

Since MA is a small state, is it possible you can move to the next state and still be within a reasonable distance to your family such that you don't have to jump on a plane just to see them?

[Meatstick]

Just my opinion and I don't know what kind of work you do but I would only consider relocating where you can actually find stable employment. With that said we are a family of 5 also and we moved from Texas to Arizona almost 10 years ago. The line of work I am in (power generation) is very plentiful in this area. We moved when the oldest boy finished 8th grade and he along with the rest of them have enjoyed a stable living arrangement that allows them to stay in the same schools and not moving here and then moving there. Moving wasn't hard for me and my wife but I am sure the kiddos weren't too happy at the time.

[BobMango]

We moved from Washington state to New Mexico last year. It was (and still is) tough to be away from family and friends. We have moved several times and we find it usually takes about 2 years to get settled in and feel like you have the connections you used to have in your old home. That being said, there are compensations. My kids seem to be thriving and are enjoying opportunities that they wouldn't have had in Washington. We've made some good friends and are starting to feel like this is home.

[tobee43]

We are a family of five, currently living in MA. We didn't reaffirm our house and because we are so far upside down, combined with a large mortgage payment (plus would like our kids in a better school system then what we are in now), we are seriously considering walking away and finding a rental. Unfortunately most rentals in our area (while being much bigger houses) are about the same price as our mortgage today. Because MA is so expensive to live in, we are now considering moving out of state altogether. We have a lot of family that live very close to us now, so the thought of moving out of state is a little nerve racking.
Thanks

we moved 1700 miles out of the house we lived in for 33 years...after all the fears and tears...and heartfelt moments...we finally realized it was the smartest thing we ever did.......the HARDEST....but SMARTEST...

family...leaving my children...waiting over 30 years for grand kids and then within 24 months having 3...just in time to leave them all....it was indeed a heart break...and our home...we brought out kids home as infants ...through the front door and watched them leave for college...from that same door.

but the memories are really all in your heart and NOT in the house....well the kids and grand children...shoot...what better than to have a set of grand parents who live near disney.....certainly would be my personal childhood dream...LOL!!!

it was so difficult going from over 4 thousand square feet to less than half that size home...but you what?? we had the entire house shut down except 3 rooms anyway....the grounds where too much for us to keep up and the heat and electric bills ran over $1100 alone!! (that's almost the amount of our rent and all utilities presently).

now that i babbled on...your question is simple for me...regrets?.....NO.....missing the family, a bit...i moved 3500 from my parents at 18...and still to this day never missed a beat with my parents. and now with skype!!!!! we see the kids weekly...frankly, that's plenty!! LOL!! it's a new life and we are JUST starting it...and loving it!! best of luck to you and yours...i promise you, what ever decision you make, it will work out just fine for you, you need to do whatever it takes to make it...and you will.
Is there anyone out there who has moved out of state (and away from family) willing to share their experience? Was there any regrets or are you happy with the decision?

[goodyphilips]

Yes completely agree with Meatstick. Its not wise to move out of state unless you land up a stable job which can pay for your rent apart from your other expenses.

[calipeachr]

I've been married for almost 10 years and I've moved from CA to TX to LA to AZ to NV and now in MO. I love beening a gypsy. But I don't have kids, just a hubby and 3 dogs. But since filing for BK with no work in the near future it looks like MO is going to be home.

[tobee43]

I've been married for almost 10 years and I've moved from CA to TX to LA to AZ to NV and now in MO. I love beening a gypsy. But I don't have kids, just a hubby and 3 dogs. But since filing for BK with no work in the near future it looks like MO is going to be home.

wow......calipeachr!!!!!! i couldn't have done that!!!

what i say now is.......the ONLY box coming out of this HOUSE is with me in it........i will NEVER move again!!!!!!!

[dscurlock]

We are a family of five, currently living in MA. We didn't reaffirm our house and because we are so far upside down, combined with a large mortgage payment (plus would like our kids in a better school system then what we are in now), we are seriously considering walking away and finding a rental. Unfortunately most rentals in our area (while being much bigger houses) are about the same price as our mortgage today. Because MA is so expensive to live in, we are now considering moving out of state altogether. We have a lot of family that live very close to us now, so the thought of moving out of state is a little nerve racking.

Is there anyone out there who has moved out of state (and away from family) willing to share their experience? Was there any regrets or are you happy with the decision?


Thanks

I am not much of a family person myself, maybe because most of my family is deceased...but I would never tie myself
down just because I have family living across the street...I have to live for me, not the family member that works
as an atty, and lives in a 3 story house. I currently live in NJ which sucks bad...it is very expensive, and people are
ready to run you over, run a light, run a stop sign without even thinking about it...people here are so selfish when
it comes to driving....I can not wait to save up enough to move back to AL where a 32x80 mobile home is like $50k
compared to $200k up here, and in a park no doubt...I would indeed have no regret moving out of NJ...but remember,
when you move from a higher paying state into a lower income state...guess what drops? If you earn $100k/yr in MA,
you may not find that kind of paying job in AL or a lower income state....

Unless you really have to move to the NE for financial or job reasons, then I would not move here.
I would never have moved up here for any other reason, and I can not wait to move back south.

[tobee43]

I am not much of a family person myself, maybe because most of my family is deceased...but I would never tie myself
down just because I have family living across the street...I have to live for me, not the family member that works
as an atty, and lives in a 3 story house. I currently live in NJ which sucks bad...it is very expensive, and people are
ready to run you over, run a light, run a stop sign without even thinking about it...people here are so selfish when
it becomes to driving....I can not wait to save up enough to move back to AL where a 32x80 mobile home is like $50k
compared to $200k up here, and in a park no doubt...I would indeed have no regret moving out of NJ...but remember,
when you move from a higher paying state into a lower income state...guess what drops? If you earn $100k/yr in MA,
you may not find that kind of paying job in AL or a lower income state....

dscurlock....we left new jersey.......and NEVER looked back....and it did suck bad to be there...it was so expensive...just our HEAT and electric ran us $1100 a month...that's more than almost all my expenses now.

i hear you tho...it's relative...you live in a "cheaper" state and the wages are lower so it all works out the same...except ONE thing... i will not be slipping on the ice this year...

[dscurlock]

dscurlock....we left new jersey.......and NEVER looked back....and it did suck bad to be there...it was so expensive...just our HEAT and electric ran us $1100 a month...that's more than almost all my expenses now.

i hear you tho...it's relative...you live in a "cheaper" state and the wages are lower so it all works out the same...except ONE thing... i will not be slipping on the ice this year...

I just actually got to NJ in the start of Summer...and it was so hot in this apartment, our first electric bill was $400 (one month)
I swear that I have never seen a bill that high in all my life, even in MN our electric was between $100-150. now that winter is
coming, I fear another electric bill once again...I think the electric compaines are theifs up here...It should be criminal to charge
you that much....in MN my full lot rent was $500 and I owned my mobile home...you can not own much of anything here in NJ
for under $200k and i surely plan not to either...and now my rent is over $1000 with skyrocket electric bill...one day I will own
that 32x80 in AL and once I own it, then I will not have to work as much as i do just to keep up with the high living expenses in NJ.
i was able to save good money in MN for my dream home, as you can imagine, my saving time has been cut in half in NJ as
everything is more expensive, then I am only able to save half as much as I was saving in MN. I guess I am lucky that I found a job
in less then a month after I lost my last job, so it could have been worse...at least I am still able to save something.

[tobee43]

I just actually got to NJ in the start of Summer...and it was so hot in this apartment, our first electric bill was $400 (one month)
I swear that I have never seen a bill that high in all my life, even in MN our electric was between $100-150. now that winter is
coming, I fear another electric bill once again...I think the electric compaines are theifs up here...It should be criminal to charge
you that much....in MN my full lot rent was $500 and I owned my mobile home...you can not own much of anything here in NJ
for under $200k and i surely plan not to either...and now my rent is over $1000 with skyrocket electric bill...one day I will own
that 32x80 in AL and once I own it, then I will not have to work as much as i do just to keep up with the high living expenses in NJ.
i was able to save good money in MN for my dream home, as you can imagine, my saving time has been cut in half in NJ as
everything is more expensive, then I am only able to save half as much as I was saving in MN. I guess I am lucky that I found a job
in less then a month after I lost my last job, so it could have been worse...at least I am still able to save something.

you describe the nightmare well...shoot it was with our mortgage costing us over 8k to live in our house........we couldn't do it anymore....we were in our house 33 years and had to let it go after we both lost our jobs.

we couldn't even ride out the foreclosure time period because of the other expenses being so high in nj. actually here it is over 2 and a half years and the bank still hasn't foreclosed, so most likely we could have stayed rent free.....but not really...because of the high cost of living there just to keep warm or cool....it's bad and i'm happy we left.

sorry you have to be there, but i'm glad you found a job!

[brokeinTN95]

My family and i just recently relocated from Tn to Iowa. We completed a chapter 7 in November 2009 after my hubby lost his job of 10 years. but this year things are turning around for us finally. He was offered a job with the same company in Iowa back in April - so he took it. We just couldnt turn it down. All of our family is in Tn so the transition has been hard, especially for our 2 kids ages 9 and 13. But it gets better every day. While I'm not sure how we will deal with the winters here, I dont regret our decision one bit. I feel this has been one of the best decisions we have made for our family to have a new start. So while it is challenging - i think anyone facing an out of state move should do it if you will have a chance at a better future after a bk. Just my thoughts!

[calipeachr]

To BrokeninTN95 (sorry If I did not get it right)- I lived in all the warm states and that first winter is going to be hard. But you learn to live with it.

I love moving everytime it's a new adventure. The first few weeks before and after the move is a pain. But soon you know how to pack and you know what is important to you and what you can live with and without.

[Okieblue]

I grew up moving around frequently, changing schools 3 times a year was normal. When we settled in AZ and I went to the same school, it bothered me. As an adult, we've moved numerous times, due to the military. I think it's good to explore. Google best places to live and where the jobs are to get an idea of what is out there.