What a mess...

[mljones06]

Here is a basic run down of my situation.

Husband left and moved to another state. Filed for divorce (no kids, no business etc.) and thought it was going to be it. He lost his job in the new state and started searching for work. After 90+ days without work, he came back to CO and started working. That job lasted all of a year before another layoff.

He thought we could reconcile. Keep the house and work out the debt. After he moved back into our mortgaged (X2) home life is MISERABLE. We don't get along and I don't think we can.

Between the first and second mortgage we are about $15k-$20k+ shy of actual value on the house. We both have seperate car loans and two to three really past due credit cards a piece.

I started receiving notices from a law firm several months ago on one of my cards. After talking with them and trying to compromise I was just served. I'm due in court with them in a month.

We don't have the money. Come to find out he has been to court on two of his old cards. I'm at a total loss.

I have to get out the house for my own sanity, piece of mind and safety. At this point I don't know where to start. I've looked at filing alone, but I don't want to screw him (it will bite me hard) and looked into a couple atty's. I can't pay upfront and none of them list anything about payment plans on their sites. Is it even feasible to try and self-file?

My pride has kept me from calling an attorney, I've tried for 4 years to do this on my own but keep getting major set backs. My head is through the brick wall, and I think I see a brighter shade of green and happy. He has been laid off from three companies since returning. Each time throws my plan out of whack.

Please... any advice, referrals, support from someone that has been as dumb as me. I don't know which way to go.

[lrprn]

First, I'm sorry to hear about all your troubles. It's tough when you can't get a breath between emotional and financial disasters

Start by setting up appointments to speak with 3-4 experienced bankruptcy lawyers in your area. Most bk lawyers provide free initial consultations.

Prepare for the meetings by pulling together and documenting all the income, debt, and expenses you have from over the last 12 months. Start keeping a daily log of everything you spend and on what, cash included.

Take a deep breath. Accept that you can't continue on your current path. Get the information you need to start down a new path that gets you out from under the financial mess you are in now. Also accept that you may have to make some hard choices to save yourself that aren't what you want to do. Last (but not least), keep posting questions you have here in the various forum areas - we'll help you sort things out as much as we can.

Hang in there! There is a way out for you. It may not be the path you hoped to take, but there is a way out.