Filing next week. Tell me it's going to be ok.

[Sherri]

First, I wanted to thank all of you for posting here. I've been reading for hours on end and there's so much great information on here.

We have a great lawyer and will be filing a no asset Ch 7. Never in our wildest dreams did I think we'd end up here, but the economy and a host of other things put us on this path. I'm dealing with it ok, my husband is an extremely private person so having to put our entire financial life out in the open is horrifying to him. He won't even talk to our family about this, and out of respect for him I'm not talking to anyone either. The thought of our names possibly being published in the local paper just about puts him in a tailspin. I thought the toughest thing was the decision to make the phone call to talk to an attorney about our options, but as we go further into this, it's getting tougher. I don't see any options for us but to continue what we're doing and file.

One thing I haven't seen alot of here (I'm probably just not looking in the right place), are stories about what happens when it's all over. Looking back, are you glad you filed? Were the ramifications as far-reaching as you thought they'd be? Is your life better now? Worse? What would you do differently?

Thanks for sharing your stories.

[discouraged]

There is a good thread but it was awhile. I think it was a question, the downside of filing bk. Hopefully some one will jump in who remembers.

The gist is - there were no downsides. Everyone felt a freedom and relief from the debt.

[discouraged]

Okay -search for downside of bk and you'll find it. it was posted December 10 in General Forum. I don't know how to link to it - but you will see it if you do the search.

[daylate]

Here you go

http://www.bkforum.com/showthread.ph...ht=downside+bk

[Sherri]

Thank you

[DesdemonaB]

It's going to be OK

The last thing I wanted to do is file BK, guess what... it happened.

I am sure there are memebers of your husband's family that wanted to (but can't / or would not) file. When was the last time you spoke to someone about about the BK section of your local newspaper?

Personally, I find that more people find out about who you owe prior to BK then after. When you have a OC or CA calling you 5X a day, 7 days a week; they hunt out anyone with your same last name within a Xamountofmiles from your last known address. What is worst having your mother-in-law know you can't pay your Macy's bill or having your name printed in less then 25 letters on page 15 of the local paper one the last Sunday of month?

Tell your husband to take a deep breath, and tell him the only people who could know are the people "who HE tells".

[pikaroth]

You will be fine! Instead of typing up a huge post about every one of my feelings and emotions leading up to and going through it, I'll just say this: after I ceased paying on my credit cards and retained my attorney, even at THAT point it felt AMAZING to have an actual income that I could save and spend on some stuff here and there that I both needed and, sometimes, just wanted. While stress and nerves never fully went away, I had my 341 meeting yesterday, and today was the first day in *YEARS* and I do mean years, that I felt great and stress free. I now quite literally have no debt minus 12 more car payments. While not rich by any means, I actually have money in the bank and am slowly building it up, and as I said, I've been able to buy some more food, see a few more movies, and buy some items here and there that I've just wanted to own (nothing expensive, mind you, just small stuff).

While I am not discharged yet (May 23rd will be it), it is more or less 'over' for me, and I'm happy. Just happy. No credit card bills rolling in every other week, not living pay check to pay check and truly wondering if I will be able to buy gas or have dinner one night.

No one here will lie to you: your feelings are going to go all over the place and sometimes change from day to day. I promise to you that it gets better and in the end it gets great. All that debt you have right now? Just imagine it gone: poof!

You're going to be so happy.

[SeattleBK]

It seems like forever since I filed a little more than two years ago, and I have absolutely no regrets what so ever.

During the time I decided to file I had lost my higher paying full time job, and I had exhausted all my savings on living expenses and paying my credit cards. My only income was child support and a minimum wage part-time job.

At that time I was devastated by the fact A, I couldn't find a full-time job and B, my choices were pay my credit cards and be tossed out on the street with my child or pay my rent and file for bankruptcy and to boot at this point we were literally eating beans.

During the BK process, I let my car go, and because of that and being able to keep my tax refund, I was able to buy a used car outright which is still running fine by the way and we were able to eat better.

Filing BK was the best decision, I have ever made period. I later did get a job and it is a government job that requires a clearance and if I had not filed BK and been proactive, I would not have gotten my clearance. It is much better to file BK than have 180 day late debts on your credit report.

Also, I'm so close to retirement that had I tried to pay all my debts off after getting a job I would not have been able to save anything for retirement not to mention the fact that I wasn't sure I would ever be able to get a job again.(at least that is what it felt like).

To add, I still don't have ANY credit cards, and that is by choice, not to say getting credit cards aren't a good idea. It just feels good not to ever have to worry about paying a credit card and having 100% of my income come to me instead of to the credit card company. At one point before my bankruptcy I was paying over $300 in interest and now that $300 is mine to keep.

[feelingnutsy]

Hi---Sherri---I'll answer your questions in a row------

1.You'll be fine---take one day at a time---and if possible---
confide in someone besides your husband---it will help.

2.Seeing what I was going through with the overwhelming
debt---I'm very glad that I filed---it's a business decision.

3.Some of the ramifications are far-reaching---and some
aren't---and what I'd say is that the whole process is life-
altering---but you'll end up on a better path---and where
there specific ramifications that you were talking about?

4.My life is infinitely better---I'm rebuilding---and feeling relief.

5.What I would do differently is to never forget the impact of debt.

[carlsbadmike]

When you have left your attorneys offce after having just filed, you will feel a load lifted off your shoulders. After the 341 meeting you feel another load lifted off your shoulders and receiving your discarge letter will be the last load lifted off our your shoulders. Then you will have your fresh start. Best wishes to you.