Feelings after BK

[HOMEBODY]

It has been 8 months since I was discharged and I have so many feelings about this. I sometimes feel relieved that I dont have the creditors calling me everyday and stressing me out. I owed about $45,000 in credit cards at the time I filed. I also had a $83,000 2nd loan on the house that I still need to negotiate. Sometimes I wonder if perhaps I wouldnt have been better off by negotiating the credits cards maybe down to $25,000. I think I could have managed that. I also let go of a home I had in another state and that went into foreclosure..so perhaps having just the bad credit for 7 years would have been better than the stigma attached to filing backruptcy and having it on your record for 10 years.

As a single woman in the dating world, I have to think about the timing in telling my romantic interest about my BK. I havent told my family but they can figure out something is up...I am not complaining about money anymore and pretty quiet about my business.

I can say that I did have a new start and BK gave me a better perspective of where I am financially.

I own 2 homes and since I didnt reaffirm and they are not reporting as being paid each month, I dont even feel like I own these homes.

Today I applied for CAP ONE, just so that I can establish my credit, but my score is still pretty low, 600 and I dont know if I'll get it. I have applied to 3 cc since my discharged and have been denied. Its a terrible feeling.

Anyway, I just feel that all in all, negotiating the $45,000 would have been better than the filing.

[ScaredINMich]

We thought about this too....we actually did settle with 4 credit card companies and numerous vendors (Our BK was 98% due to a failed business, SBA Loan and business credit card debt). It's what we tried to do for a long time, but then the money the business had was gone and we were about to pull from our 401K for the rest and then I looked at it and thought "why?" My credit is screwed up already....what's the point?

I understand completely. Only a handful of people know that we filed and my thought is that more people than you know have done the same thing, it's just not talked about.

[debee]

I own 2 homes and since I didn't reaffirm and they are not reporting as being paid each month, I dont even feel like I own these homes.

They may not be reporting, but you're building equity.

You'll feel like an owner when when you sell the rental and get to keep a big fat check, and when your home is finally paid off you'll have the mortgage payment money to play with.

Life post-bk can be choppy, but you have to focus on the positives or you end up sinking your own ship.

[BROKEDED]

I have no regrets other than having gotten myself into a place where Bankruptcy was the best option I had left. I use to see BK as the option of last resorts for people who had failed in life. As I am working towards my third year of drastically reduced wages, I now see it as just another financial tool to help me get to where I want to be. Granted, it does have it's price but if it were not for these bad times opening my eyes to what I was doing and where I was headed, I would still be stressed each week robbing Peter to pay Paul to cover my ass-ets. My life was suffering, my marriage was suffering because of my stress and at some point I knew my child would suffer.

The filing process and the time up until the 341 did put an extra burden on my wife and I but since the 341 was done a couple weeks ago, it's been easy breezy. We're not discharged yet but a TON of stress has been lifted off my shoulders.

Don't feel bad about being denied for credit as if a credit card or a great score is a must have. It's not. It never will be. Just look at credit as a very small piece of a puzzle that helps you get to where you want to be. May I suggest you see if a bank will let you get a secured loan to help build your credit instead of a credit card. That way you have a closed end loan with set payments and a fixed term that won't tempt you to get wrapped up with a credit card.