I need help so stressed out

[sammiie]

Ok my husband and I received foreclosure papers. Our house will be sold on sheriffs auction on Oct 31. we are trying to figure out if we should file bankruptcy or not most people say no way it will ruin us. However I thought I would try to get info from people who have gone through it. We really want to keep the house. I have about 18,000 worth of credit card and medical debt, my husband has about 12,000.

My husband works full time I am a stay at home mom. Our income last year was about 35,000 it will be about 40,000 this year. We have 3 children. We don't know which chapter is best for us. I have an appointment with and attorney on Monday I would just like to go into it with some information.
Our house payments are 575.00 with our home owners insurance and property taxes included. We have been getting our checking account garnished every now and then which has come to haunt us. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

[HHM]

Good for you for taking steps to inform yourself.

Never listen to the advice of people that haven't been where you are at. Bankruptcy will not ruin you, it will set you free.

I don't have the numbers handy, but you will want to find out what you state's median income is for your size family. I am guessing you would probably be under that, so you could qualify for a chapter 7.

You need to ask yourself this question.

If you got rid of your unsecured debt, i.e. credit cards, medical bills, could you afford your house payment, and ALL you other regular monthly expenses?

Even if you could afford the house, do you really want to keep it?

The catch is, if you want to keep the house, and since you are already behind on payments, you would have to file a chapter 13 which means you will be in a payment plan for 3-5 years.

Under your circumstances, it is probably more reasonable to let the house go, and file Chapter 7 and eliminate all your other debt.

[Lindsay]

From all the books I've read and learned through personal experiences on the board and through friends who have filed, bankruptcy will not ruin you. I've been trying to pay my bills for years and years while getting further behind. I had considered filing BK before the new laws took effect in 2005. I decided to stick it out. This was a huge mistake. We now owe like $30,000 more and I'm completely broke from trying to pay even the minimums. We're behind on all of the utilities even and saving for the lawyer. I wish I had done it then and went on with my life.

A friend of ours filed BK7 a few years ago right before the new laws took effect. He has a wallet full of credit cards (at relatively low rates, around 10%) and he's getting ready to buy a $100,000 house (which buys alot in our area). It didn't ruin him. In fact, that was his second bankruptcy. He filed in 1981 as well and it didn't ruin him back then either.

Sometimes you just have to admit that you need a fresh start, learn from your mistakes, and start over. Some of us, like me, take longer to realize this.

This board is great. When I first thought of bankruptcy, I felt like a real loser. I had always been meticulous about paying bills on time and we once owned a beautiful FICO score. When we bought our vehicle in 2004, we didn't have to put down any money and they gave us 1.9% interest. Of course, we had alot of debt but it was still manageable at the time. Then my eBay business dropped off, we started to tap our home equity to make minimum payments and everything went into a tailspin. We thrashed water for years, but we were drowning.

After reading posts on these boards, I realize that there are so many people in the same situation. Things just got out of control for us. When I signed up for PACER, I ran some of the names of our family and friends and found that about half of them had filed during various times in the last 15 years. When a collector called my husband at work, his boss called him into his office to ask about it. The boss confided that he had filed personal BK himself ten years ago. You'd probably be amazed at how many people you know have had financial trouble at one time or another.

[Bandit]

Good for you for taking steps to inform yourself.

Never listen to the advice of people that haven't been where you are at. Bankruptcy will not ruin you, it will set you free.

After reading posts on these boards, I realize that there are so many people in the same situation. Things just got out of control for us. When I signed up for PACER, I ran some of the names of our family and friends and found that about half of them had filed during various times in the last 15 years. When a collector called my husband at work, his boss called him into his office to ask about it. The boss confided that he had filed personal BK himself ten years ago. You'd probably be amazed at how many people you know have had financial trouble at one time or another.

Good posting Lindsay & HHM. I will second all that!

I come to find out it is about 8 out of 10 people I know who have filed and they are way better off today than where they were before BK. It does not ruin people, it sets us free.

Life has it's ups and downs just as the motto says and it is true. This board is so good for people because it has those coming in all ship wrecked and drowning to catch the lifeline & learn what we have to do. Then those who are right in the middle who faced it head on are already starting to heal and then those who are being set free every day.

[chpxiii]

Boy, do I understand the stress. I'm year 4 of my chapter 13. I could NOT find a job to even survive. And when I did find something, the pay was so low I could barely survive. I was depressed, even suicidal. Which made things worse, I feel, because interviewers could sense the depression - I'm positive about that. Why woould any employer want a sad, depressed, employee? I know I wouldn't.

I started working with an AA sponsor and he suggested (he filed Chpt. 7 a few years ago and he's now a multi-millionaire) that I file. I *NEEDED* to keep my car. So I ended up in a 13. There are times when I regret filing...because almost immediately after filing my life turned around.

I firmly believe that the relief I received from filing helped to turn my life around - my depression, my general attitude, etc. improved immenseley. I was "lighter," happier, and the payment was something doable at even a minimum wage job. Which was a HUGE relief for me. We did a cram-down on my car which considerably lowered my payments. I am paying off other secured, and I've got much unsecured debt that will be discharged. I guess you can say I'm "lucky" in that filed early on, rather than making things worse. Now, I do have student loans that have been in forebearance and my monthly payment may be HUGE, but I am now in a position to be able to pay them - and I will be negotiating to try and bring my payment down some. The added benefit is that I have learned to budget (something I did not know how to do) and have learned to live a cash-n-carry life. My washer and dryer? Mine! My clothes and other things? Mine! ALL MINE! And not purchased on credit. It's SUCH a great feeling.

I used to have such an idea about those who filed bankruptcy that I delayed filing for a couple of months and I could not believe I was about to file bankruptcy. But I did. And I've learned humility and compassion for others - not just those who are going to file bankruptcy, but for people in general and their circumstances. Life happens.

At anyrate, filing did not ruin me. Sure, I wish I didn't have this "black mark" on my credit report, sure it'll take time to rebuild my credit, and sure I won't be able to buy a home until my early 40's (I feel like I'm SO LATE in life ) but, on a meta-physical level - this is the path that I have taken and I can only be positive and find the lessons to learn in this. I'm not *entirely* glad I filed for bankruptcy, but I did and there's no changing the past. I'm picking up my life pieces and making a new life. And I promise you it is SO MUCH better than before I filed.