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Divorce 1st or BK 1st?

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    #16
    Originally posted by 2Bshinyandnew View Post
    My soon to be ex is filing before the divorce, so for him, the family income is below the means test when he files. I will file BK after the divorce is final. I have been a mostly stay at home mom for 18 years and a full time student for the past 2 years. Due to almost $60K in joint credit card debt, I have no choice but to file since he is.

    Whatever is most advantageous for you. You probably will not get the "fairest" most optimal result since you are no longer a "team", but you can mitigate your losses. No court, bankruptcy or family court is going to absolve you of everything because your ex or soon to be ex is a whacko, or a liar or a thief. You may get stuck paying for something that just isn't fair. You may have to settle for the least financially damaging solution rather than the best case scenario, because absolute justice, for you, may not exist. I learned the hard way. Doesn't seem fair that he can live it up on our joint credit for the last 5 years and then BK it away, leaving me holding the ball, but he can. I could try to get a spousal support order to cover his 1/2 of the debt, you know, "make him pay" but he really doesn't have the means to.After my initial shock, I'm resigned to it.

    I was pretty much destroyed over the realization that not only is my marriage OVER, I am going to have to file bankruptcy too
    I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I know it must be hard. BK is not as bad as you think it might be. My W filed in 2000. Up until the time that she quit paying bills again, she was able to live like it never happened.

    In my case, I let her go on too long and now here I am. She's left me with the kids and the debt. I'll manage; it'll probably be easier without her as far managing the money.

    I used to joke that when I met my W, the only bill I had was my truck payment; now it's the only thing I got that's paid for and I still got it.

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      #17
      Originally posted by cupcake View Post
      I am accomplishing the same thing but I am getting the divorce first. And, we couldn't qualify for a CH 7 if we filed jointly because we would be over the median income for our state. However, we can both file CH 7 on our own because our individual incomes will be under the median. As long as the divorce judgment states that we are each responsible for debt in our name individually and we are both responsible for paying the joint debt, aren't we going to end up the same way?
      Your right, that would be the other way to go if it is necessary. If you are over median income jointly, it would be best.

      But if you are not, BK first will take some of the stress off by getting the creditors to go away. Chapter 7 lasts approx 3-4 months, divorce can sometimes take 6 months to 2 years. Most of that time is spent dividing (fighting over) assets and debts.

      I don't know the laws in every state, but in Minnesota you can serve the other party with the petition for dissolution and summons then not file the documents at the court until months later. In the interim the summons will prohibit either party from selling assets or incurring more debt in the others name. During this time they can also file and discharge their debts in bankruptcy.

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        #18
        Originally posted by JRScott View Post
        Well they both could be correct in their respective areas.

        The Divorce Lawyer is correct that Divorce and property settlements are not dischargeable in a BK. Thus if the D happened first and the divorce decree established that she would get the car and you would continue to pay the car until it was paid off then that could not be discharged. If this is something you don't want then BK first is the answer.

        Depending on your household income, it is possible the BK lawyer is also telling you the truth if both of your incomes combined place you over the median income.
        I'm not sure this is correct. Divorce debt is dischargeable in a 13 IF it is not child support, alimony or other support. My case: Husband was ordered to pay credit cards, boat, lease in property settlement with ex-wife. In a 13, his obligation to the creditor will be discharged AND so will his obligation to her. In a 7, his obligation to the creditor would be discharged but not his obligation to her and she could sue in family court to make her whole.

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          #19
          We're doing the Bkcy first -- I'd be over the median with just me and my daughter if I waited until after.

          We had our 341 meeting today and have my divorce attorney working on my petition. Both my D and B attorney's advised I wait until after the 341 to officially file for divorce.

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            #20
            Originally posted by Kim in MN View Post
            We're doing the Bkcy first -- I'd be over the median with just me and my daughter if I waited until after.

            We had our 341 meeting today and have my divorce attorney working on my petition. Both my D and B attorney's advised I wait until after the 341 to officially file for divorce.
            Sounds like a good plan, every case is different.

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              #21
              Thanks

              Thanks all who responded to my question. It was very enlightening. We are going to file BK first; then wait to make a decision on the D.

              Thanks again.

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                #22
                in the same boat here .. BK or DV first .. I think we are going to BK first since he has no income to speak of we will easily be able to CH7 - much less to haggle over in the DV. Just told him tonight we are going to have to BK the house because he can't afford it and pay me child support. DUH Married for 17 yrs so there is lots of stuff to deal with, plus kids, plus business .. it's gonna be a mess no matter what, but I am guess much less of a mess if we BK first and get rid of debt and house (no equity anyway). Sucks really really bad .. and we are just beginning this journey ......................... can't beleive I am about to literally 'start over' in so many ways!!! =(

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                  #23
                  Originally posted by fljb View Post
                  in the same boat here .. BK or DV first .. I think we are going to BK first since he has no income to speak of we will easily be able to CH7 - much less to haggle over in the DV. Just told him tonight we are going to have to BK the house because he can't afford it and pay me child support. DUH Married for 17 yrs so there is lots of stuff to deal with, plus kids, plus business .. it's gonna be a mess no matter what, but I am guess much less of a mess if we BK first and get rid of debt and house (no equity anyway). Sucks really really bad .. and we are just beginning this journey ......................... can't beleive I am about to literally 'start over' in so many ways!!! =(
                  Sorry to hear about what your going through; but then I feel your pain. I'm just glad that I don't have a business to deal with. the BK should make the D settlement a whole lot easier.

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