very hard question.....

[monica1]

I live in NC and have recently separated from my husband. Just about every possible bill is in my name due to his "not so good, but not terrible" credit. The house, 3 credit cards, tons of medical bills, durango, etc. are all in my name and He has co-signed with me on only 2 things, A 15K home equity loan and my aveo car. We both were out of work under a doctors care this past year and he also was laid off temporarily, making us fall way, way behind. The stress was unreal because of this and some other problems and he started getting abusive w/me. I have decided to leave the un-safe situation and am living w/an old friend in another county. I filed chapter 7 on Oct. 14. I told the attorney that I wish to re-affirm both vehicles so that we can both be able to get to and fro our work. (We may have our differences and are separated, but regardless of the situation, I am still a decent and civil person.) I am willfully surrendering "our" home. No choice, I can't stay there but I also can't trust him to pay the mortgage for the next 28 yrs!!!! I owe 101K, it was just appraised in the last 6 months for 124K (for the home equity loan) and the tax value is 142K. If I am willfully surrendering the home and he is still living in it, can he just settle something out w/Wells fargo?? or does he have to wait until foreclosure to try and buy it himself?? or can I do a "short sale" to him?? My attorney said to tell him he may want to find an apt. but that he can choose to stay in the home, rent-free, until he is forced out if he wants to procrastinate. He really wants to "keep" the home and I would love for him to if he can do it on his own. What are the "rules" w/this one?? I have read and read and read this awesome sight and really still don't have a clue.

[AAAArt]

Please quit worrying about this guy. Taking care of and enabling him will not bring him back! He's probably SOL on the house, but he certainly can see what he can work out w/ Wells Fargo. At the least, he'll be able to live there rent-free for possibly 6 months to a year.
Please reconsider re-affirming the Durango. Let him make the arrangements to try and keep it. You really need the fresh start that BK provides and paying someone else's debts for 2 - 5 more years is not the way to do it!
Quite honestly, you are not in a proper mental/emotional/financial state right now to be making decisions and worrying about how it will affect someone else. (Don't be worried or offended by that statement..it's normal and most of us have been there.) The best thing you can do for yourself and him is to let your lawyer make "logical" decisions now. Art

[monica1]

Art,
don't worry, I am not offended by your statement. I actually have heard it over and over from the ones who really care about me. I have been through so much w/this guy emotionally/financially/mentally over the past 2 years. Most women probably would of put him out on his behind or called the cops A LONG TIME AGO. I don't want his attitude back in my life, 3 strikes and you are out!! (no pun intended) By the way, He has co-signed on MY car. He has the durango. He needs the durango for his work and I need the aveo for gas mileage. "sticky situation". Hate to say it, but I've also just last week set up monthly payments out of MY paycheck w/the IRS for 2004 taxes that haven't been paid. You are so so right about "my mental" state. You can probably tell I am a "fixer" type of person. I have read so much on here about people worrying about the 341 mtg. etc, and I am just tickled to death knowing that I will more than likely be "OK" in a few months, even if I DO have to pay back some of this, mostly his, debt. Shall I be beaten w/a wet noodle??? lol

[StaciMM]

A not about reaffirming... If your state allows you continue payments & keep the vehicles without reaffirming, this is your best bet. That way you're off the hook (he isn't since his name is on the Durango) and if he defaults, they can come to you for the $$.