health is sinking fast

[killinstinct]

Momisery, don't despair so. You would be surprised what you can do to make money. I have seen people in large cities who have set up lunch wagon's beside large construction sites and served hot meals to construction workers and made more money at that than they ever did working for a huge company. Likewise with daycare centers people opened on their own. 60 is the new 50. A nursing degree can be had in two years. Everyone is screaming for nurses. Likewise with teaching.

GREAT ADVICE!!!

Just stay away from California....especially as a teacher! Yikes!!

[momisery]

I do appreciate the support, but I wil lbe 60 in 6 months, so going back to school is a bit of a pipe dream. I work full time and hubby works for straight commission so I NEED to work full time in banking. He hates school, and is scrambling to find out what to do for income. At 60 he is not a picture of health he has emphysema and his joints hurt all the time. He normally gets 4-6 hours of sleep a night because he can not get comfortable. Now what comes to mind I would guess is an out of shape old man.. but he really is maybe 20 pounds over what he should be. Being older and being faced with this is much scarier .. wish I was younger.. but I will have to learn to deal with it.

[lookingforward]

Well....had a bad night last night. Found out my wife is hocked to the hilt in payday loans, all utilities are 2 months past due, water got turned off yesterday, tv is next and after that the land line. Cell phone are allready off. We have no groceries. I feal so betrayed trusting her with all the finances. I am so numb this morning to just about everything except fealing like such a failure as a father and husband, but I am trying not to crack. I am having more and more thoughts of suicide, neglect and btrayal and I am just so drained. God help us please!!!!

Crash, please don't despair. Please don't talk about suicide. Unless your wife was using the money for something inappropriate, please be patient. I don't know your circumstances, but maybe she was just doing what she had to do? You are not a failure!!!!!!!!! I am truly worried about you. You mention God and prayer in several of your posts, maybe you could talk to your pastor? I will include you in my prayers also. Please, please, please, don't talk about suicide. Your kids need you. PM me if you need someone to talk to. A teenager that my son knows attempted suicide last week because his father was dead. Don't think they will be better off without you, they won't. You are on the right track financially by trying to get yourself a fresh start. Unless I'm completely mistaken, the payday loans can be included in your BK. Hang in there!!!!!

[MSbklawyer]

Momisery, don't despair so. You would be surprised what you can do to make money. I have seen people in large cities who have set up lunch wagon's beside large construction sites and served hot meals to construction workers and made more money at that than they ever did working for a huge company. Likewise with daycare centers people opened on their own. 60 is the new 50. A nursing degree can be had in two years. Everyone is screaming for nurses. Likewise with teaching.

[killinstinct]

Well....had a bad night last night. Found out my wife is hocked to the hilt in payday loans, all utilities are 2 months past due, water got turned off yesterday, tv is next and after that the land line. Cell phone are allready off. We have no groceries. I feal so betrayed trusting her with all the finances. I am so numb this morning to just about everything except fealing like such a failure as a father and husband, but I am trying not to crack. I am having more and more thoughts of suicide, neglect and btrayal and I am just so drained. God help us please!!!!

You guys are NOT paying CC's right? (I hope not).

You may have to miss a mortgage payment or two to catch up. This is no way to live. You need food, water, phone.

[crashzx]

Well....had a bad night last night. Found out my wife is hocked to the hilt in payday loans, all utilities are 2 months past due, water got turned off yesterday, tv is next and after that the land line. Cell phone are allready off. We have no groceries. I feal so betrayed trusting her with all the finances. I am so numb this morning to just about everything except fealing like such a failure as a father and husband, but I am trying not to crack. I am having more and more thoughts of suicide, neglect and btrayal and I am just so drained. God help us please!!!!

[momisery]

I am still in the depressed stages. I have never been late, always watched what I spend. I got married about 10 years ago to my high school sweetie, and he has been BK before. We do fight is there was never a light he would not leave on. And he loves to buy stuff. Mostly though he got good jobs, he just never could keep them. But the car business is a revolving door. Trouble was he was laid off so much and when things were good he spent more. We did move a lot to get him a better job too. But the thing that ruined us was moving from GA. We did it because of a violent neighborhood problem, but the house would not sell. We had it rented and thought it would be okay. I kept telling him a smaller area would be hard for jobs, and it took me forever to find one that paid well. He never really found one that lasted. By then the car business was dying, and he was laid off over and over. Part of it is his age I am sure too. Then the troubles went really deep when WF would not really do a short sale even though they said they would. Then, we lost our tennant. He still is drawing unemployment too while he works for total commission. So, the problems were bad timing, believing the jobs will always be easy to get and he would get a great one soon, and letting him continue to do commission only jobs. However, I doubt that a crummy paying job would have saved us if he worked hourly either. The medical bills were the last kick over the cliff.

I have learned to live low again... but I feel a bit of anger with him because he isn't as frugal as I am. I guess he will learn or we will not make it. At almost 60, there isn't really a future for us becuase by the time the BK passes we will be about ready to hang it all up I would guess.. lol It makes me angry, I felt I worked two jobs so much of my life to get ahead, and then age came a long and made jobs hard to get, then being misled into a horrible neighborhood when we knew nothing about the state, and then the slow down. If we could be doing what we were doing we would have paid if all off in a couple years and been just fine. Oh, well... that was the thinking. So much for thinking.. lol

[crashzx]

You know I just came back to check on this poster and am overwhelmed by how awesome people on this forum are. The words of encouragement are so touching. Good job! No wonder people like me hang around, this forum is almost a life saver during one of the most stressful times in people's lifes.

Now I looked back to see if I could see what state you are in and couldn't find it. But if you do some research by your state bankruptcy exemptions you can answer some of your questions about what you have in exemptions. It could be possible with your exemptions your tools and truck and home will be fine.


You will be fine, you aren't feeling anything most of us have't felt before. But believe me, there is a light at the end of the tunnel, I am almost there. The relief I feel being down to my last week before discharge is almost unexplainable, only a fellow BK'er can understand. It is like a fresh begining, like being able to breath again, plan again, like we actually have a future, something I couldn't see before because I was scared. Someday you will be where we are, and if you are like me, you won't forget how scary all this is and you won't going down this path again.

And one last thing, thanks for the pug compliment. We are a pug family, we have 3 now. We adore them! Our youngest is plain and simply Fat! Hey hug the pug when you are feeling down, if your's is anything like ours, I am sure you can get a laugh a day out of him/her!

Amen....God bless all of you!!! He and my family and alot of my freind are helping me through this (those of you here also). For that I am so greatful!!!

[justplaintired]

You know I just came back to check on this poster and am overwhelmed by how awesome people on this forum are. The words of encouragement are so touching. Good job! No wonder people like me hang around, this forum is almost a life saver during one of the most stressful times in people's lifes.

Now I looked back to see if I could see what state you are in and couldn't find it. But if you do some research by your state bankruptcy exemptions you can answer some of your questions about what you have in exemptions. It could be possible with your exemptions your tools and truck and home will be fine.


You will be fine, you aren't feeling anything most of us have't felt before. But believe me, there is a light at the end of the tunnel, I am almost there. The relief I feel being down to my last week before discharge is almost unexplainable, only a fellow BK'er can understand. It is like a fresh begining, like being able to breath again, plan again, like we actually have a future, something I couldn't see before because I was scared. Someday you will be where we are, and if you are like me, you won't forget how scary all this is and you won't going down this path again.

And one last thing, thanks for the pug compliment. We are a pug family, we have 3 now. We adore them! Our youngest is plain and simply Fat! Hey hug the pug when you are feeling down, if your's is anything like ours, I am sure you can get a laugh a day out of him/her!

[crashzx]

I am almost there. I will be going to an attorny next week. I have come to terms with loosing the bike because it is THE only thing that is paid for. Oh well I can replace it, I am in the buissness. BUT....there is a possibility that I could keep it.

[southernbelle]

All of the previous posts hit it home. Make sure to talk to an attorney (or several) to get a realistic picture of what you should expect and what your exemptions will allow you to keep. Your numbers look good and the credit cards will go away so at the end of the day, you'll end up much better off than you are right now. Don't get discouraged and talk to a professional about your situation. Good luck to you and your family.

[killinstinct]

Hang in there zx! You'll do just fine. Your numbers look good. Remember, with BK all of your credit cards go bye bye...no more of those payments! So when you can, sit down and make a serious budget (including a savings plan). You can do this!!!

[JRScott]

That's close enough that you shouldn't have to consider letting it go then.

As for the tools and things. Make sure you price them as you would for sell in a garage sale, not necessarily to someone that really needs it and is willing to pay top dollar. You might check out second hand sales mags see what folks getting for them or craigslist. You might can find exemptions to cover the tools if they are tools of the trade.

Might also depending on state be able to exempt the truck.

The motorbike unless you have unused wildcard is probably gone.

Try not to let it overwhelm you.

[crashzx]

May I ask how much your mortgage is, and then how much you make?

To be fair to you if the mortgage is more than 25% of your income, you probably need to consider letting the place go unless you can't find anything cheaper in your area (like Southern California is rough on folks in that respect, New York City too).

Mortgage is 1250 and we bring in 4000 so it is right there at 25%. I believe we would be fine if we could just get rid of the credit card 30,000 debt.

[crashzx]

Well, you see, you are figuring it out all ready. Now your tools may be exempt, what kind of word to you do? Tools of your trade usually are exempt as the Court knows you need them to recover. Used tools do not bring a whole lot of money. Go to a large flea market and there are old tools everywhere. Even craftsmen wrenches for like fifty cents.

We have all been where you are now and we all know the sickening feeling in our gut about what do I do now? Once filed you will start the healing process. The big secret is, learn now to downsize your lifestyle and start practicing it. There are many more in the same boat as you, and with our crummy economy, more will come. The forgiveness of debt is waiting for you to act and it will be over in just several months. Usually close to three or four. If you don't get into the practice of spending extremely thrifty though, you could be back in this spot again. That is the challenge of bk. 'Hub

Yea that sickning fealing is overwhelming me. Thank you for the words of encouragment. God bless all of you for yor imput.

I am a paint technical adviser/ feild instructor for an auto paint distributor. I paint motorcycles on the side a little to help.