Why are so many posts about "how can I screw the bank or my credit card company?"

[AngelinaCat]

Okay, there is more than enough emotion at play here, and I believe that everyone is a little too sensitive. This thread has run its course. It is now time to go to bed and get a good night's sleep. Tomorrow is a new day, and things will look better in the morning. Good night.

[Dee]

There will always be people who take advantage of things - this is not what the BK Forum is about,

I am just so very, very grateful for finding this site. Thank you to all of you.

Ditto and very well said.

[discouraged]

Wow- What a forum! Pwesonally I would like to say that without the BK Forum I would have been lost. I LIKE having the knowledge of how to stay in my house. It saddens me very much that I will be losing it unless I somehow attain a full time job again. (Currently working temp - after a long year of not working). I WISH I'd found this forum earlier, before I cashed out my 401k and spent all my savings (They would have paid for the BK!)

I need the knowledge of what to do. How to proceed. What to expect.

There will always be people who take advantage of things - this is not what the BK Forum is about,

I am just so very, very grateful for finding this site. Thank you to all of you.

[NowImDownInIt]

BITTER, BITTER, BITTER. Nice to see that everyone has taken my saying that "IF" you are extending things and "IF" you are doing things that don't help you in the end and "IF" "MAYBE" the advice you give may not be all that wise to a new person you should re-think it to "YOUR NOT BETTER THAN ME, YOUR JUDGING ME, GET OFF YOUR SOAP BOX". So much anger and just waiting for a target to shoot at.

This made no sense to me.

[treehugger1]

In my OPINION, Here is the bottom line BKman. Both sides sign a contract. A financial contract is all that is signed. There are no "moral" or "ethical" contracts when it comes to money and the law. The comsumer point of view states " I agree to pay within the terms." The negation side of the consumer contract essentially states that. "If I fail to pay, then the lender can use the power of the law against me." Now "the law" addresses both sides. In my mind, it all comes down to the contract; both sides assume risk. I could care less if the borrower is strategically defaulting or defaulting on debt they could not pay. It is not a moral issue. Both sides "signed on the bottom line." Please correct me if I am wrong. It seems to me you want to tie moral and ethical considerations into a financial contract. Such considerations are in you and other's heads. They don't exist on paper. If the laws allow consumers to default and drag out the consequences and live "free of charge" for months or years, then you should be addessing the laws, not the consumers.

[Bkman2]

BITTER, BITTER, BITTER. Nice to see that everyone has taken my saying that "IF" you are extending things and "IF" you are doing things that don't help you in the end and "IF" "MAYBE" the advice you give may not be all that wise to a new person you should re-think it to "YOUR NOT BETTER THAN ME, YOUR JUDGING ME, GET OFF YOUR SOAP BOX". So much anger and just waiting for a target to shoot at.

I'll go. Good luck to everyone trying to fix their lives for the better and remember that people that post here are not experts and you should always check with someone that knows the laws of your state before you do something that will cost you in the end.

Don't see a way to end the account so maybe someone can do it for me.

[Dee]

It seems to me that a couple of people took a wrong turn and ended up on the BK forum today. They really meant to go to the "Holier-Than-Thou, Aren't-I-Wonderful-Because-I-Did-My-BK-The-Right-Way, I-Paid-All-My-Debt-Off, Nah-Nah-Nah" forum.

And for the record:

No, I don't feel like the banks owed me anything for being current for years. But their business practices did contribute to the financial meltdown in this country. That's just a fact. You don't have to like that fact, but you can't change facts. Some people didn't have the option of just cancelling their cards when the rates went up. Goodie for you if you could, but get off your high-horse about it, because no one really cares.

I am not bitter about having to file BK. Stuff happens. And I have every intention of just "moving on" once this is over with.

I don't judge others who file BK or question their motives/methods. Everyone's situation is different and everyone deals with it in different ways.

I will give someone practical advice if they ask. I will not berate them for "dragging it out" or question their methods. If you choose to do so, don't get your panties in a wad when you get called out on it.

[NowImDownInIt]

If you've moved on and look down on sharing (experienced and educated) advice, then why are you still here? Sometimes waiting things out is the best advice someone can get. It's a relief to most that, if they have to, they can stay where they are (even if for only a matter of months). I think I know what post may have set this off and I am one to say move on if the case warrants it, but it's not always an immediately viable option. Sometimes there is a choice between staying in a home that is in foreclosure or being homeless or stressing and scrambling to find a new home. I personally think that this is all stressful enough without the visions of packing your family up and moving in with your parents dancing in your head... and I had to do that right after I filed because I was laid off 3 months in. This is all so emotional. Losing a home after any period of time can be devastating. The feeling of failure can be all consuming.

I am not going to continue arguing with you or calling you judgmental. I can't fully understand where you are coming from, but I won't completely discount your opinion. I think that's where you should start since you seem to want to be here. You aren't going to agree with everyone's advice, but starting a thread that's pretty much dressing down the experienced members of this site is reasonably guaranteed to start an unneeded quarrel on the board. You kind of brought all these criticisms upon yourself.

On here, we look out for our own. This is not a forum for supporting big banking and CC companies. This is a sanctuary for people facing one of the toughest things that many people will ever face.. We're all just trying to get through it alive and still have the will to live. It's all about having and lending hope.

[Bkman2]

Imagine that, I was one of you bitter, don't judge me types and I changed. I took at bad thing and changed my life for the better, didn't drag it out didn't keep *****ing about it for years. Didn't give people advice so theirs would drag out. I did my rant and fixed it. I made $10,000 last year thats why I stay at home with my kid. My attorney advised me to file separtae taxes so I would have money to cover bills. I converted in July because the money was gone. Look that post up! I paid $46,000 to my CCs in 2 years. I spent every dime I had. I ranted at the start and fixed it so I can move on. I never said that people using the law to remove debt was wrong but you seem to feel free to blame me for doing it. Whos playing the blame game now?

[NowImDownInIt]

Let's speak frankly about your moral superiority.

You were in a 13. Had 3 times the CC debt that I have and half the payment. You make a lot more than me, (I'm under median for my family of four) and the cost of living in Nevada is much lower, plus you said you're a WAHD so you don't have to deal with daycare. You could have afforded the 13, but you couldn't stick with the budget so you converted. All this while filing separate taxes so your wife's wouldn't go to the creditors.

You even said:

"I know that some people think I should just shut up and stay in the 13 because I own the money but when all of my credit cards were paid on time and they still raised my interest from 7.99% to 29.99% I tried to keep up. I can't keep up anymore. I need this mess to be over with so I/we can move on."

Sounds a little like you know what it's like to blame the CC companies.

Sounds a lot like the excuses that you can't seem to relate to.

Anyway, why would any of the "gurus" bother with blaming you... sounds like you think we all have enough people we feel like blaming.

[Bkman2]

I do mean well. I think we all need help in fixing our problems, but I NEVER said I was better or MY WAY is the best way, NERVER said others are wrong in how they want to do their BK. Its the GURUs that started with the "don't judge me, you think your better than me, you don't know me". I was talking about advice being given by some that MAYBE would keep the people just starting out from ending this by extending it. We all have reasons why we need to wait to file, if we even do file. I do feel that advice that prolongs things needlessly doesn't fix them. That, I guess was the point I wanted to make but everyone took the wrong way so THEY could get up on the soap box and add me to the list of people they need to blame.

WHATEVER......I'm done.

[backtoschool]

Never mind

Too late, I already read your post and it was very well said.

[Pandora]

What it boils down to Bkman2, is that you believe that somehow your bankruptcy is morally superior to other bankruptcies. You have set an arbitrary criteria for why your bankruptcy is morally superior, and you are using that self-designed set of values to pronounce judgment on other members of this forum. That is your choice to do, just as we all have the choice to ignore this thread, or put you on mute.

Self-designed morality is a slippery slope however. Every extra beer, every pay-per-view movie, every extra byte of data on your cell phone, every dinner out have to be weighed against your moral scale. Do you always pass your own judgments and your own standards regarding spending and saving?

I think you mean well Bkman2, but judgments are not helpful. I have said this many times. We are all equally bankrupt on this board, and nobody's bankruptcy is "better" than anybody else's.

Well said bts....very well said. I still have yet to see who the OP is talking about - post wise. ???

[NowImDownInIt]

ok...well since we are giving awards YOU GET the MOST CREATIVE BKFORUM Chat Slang AWARD!!!! ROFLMAKINGMEPEEMYPANTS!!!!

and we are having way to much fun to be going thru such stress!!!

Bah haha... Stress? I can't afford stress.. No, really, trustee is taking all my botox, booze, and chocolate money. Can't be dealing with all this premature wrinkles.

[987654]

Never mind