Missing someone tonight
My first born was premature and was severly disabled. Believe it or not, I did not qualify for government programs because a family of 4 with $40,000 year income (I think that was about what I was making back then) does not qualify for government based medical insurance. So back then I told myself that I am being honest as an example to others and someone out there must need it more than me if I am turned down. Well 4 years later I qualified for the exemption program where they no longer consider my income and he qualified for help based on his income ($0). I had insurance for 3 months and he died in his sleep.
My son was 8 years old and he didnt even know he was different. Even though I did not show it, I hurt more than I even knew because I went into a depression. I stopped paying my bills for 6 MONTHS!!! I dont even know how we were still in the house. I had to file for CH13 because my husband finally finished school and started working too so we made good money. And so I just want to get off my chest that I am not a deadbeat. I am a grieving mother.
And so I miss my son tonight. I love you DeDe. Looking forward to seeing you again.
My son was 8 years old and he didnt even know he was different. Even though I did not show it, I hurt more than I even knew because I went into a depression. I stopped paying my bills for 6 MONTHS!!! I dont even know how we were still in the house. I had to file for CH13 because my husband finally finished school and started working too so we made good money. And so I just want to get off my chest that I am not a deadbeat. I am a grieving mother.
And so I miss my son tonight. I love you DeDe. Looking forward to seeing you again.
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