Why!!!! Why!!!

[freshstart06]

Okay, I had no objections but I am still worried, worried about the discharge even though the clerk told me herself that the UStrustee and the creditors already had their chance to object. It is all admistrative and I should be discharge pretty soon and not to worry, I am done.

What is wrong with me, all this bK stuff is behind me, no more worrying about the filing, no more worrying about the 341 meeting, done with the 60 day club. Credit scores went up, money getting a little better but still have a lot of work.

Is this like post traumatic stress disorder or is this normal and will pass??? Or I just got so use to worrying that now that I don't have anything to worry about I am making up stuff LOL>

Support is needed LOL> Don't get me wrong I am happy this is over as well.

[confusedguy]

If you'll excuse an answer from someone who calls himself "confusedguy" I have to tell you that I have the same feelings even though I'm at the beginning of the process.

I would imagine that what you are experiencing, that ill at ease feeling, is something called "cognitive dissonance". I don't think that anyone feels good about declaring bankruptcy. I know that I don't. It's not something that I thought I'd have to do in my life. So, that underlying anxiety is caused by conflict; you're feeling good and bad about something at the same time.

The mind has a funny way of telling you that something isn't quite right. For instance, when you leave the grocery store knowing that you've forgotten something, but because you just can't recall what it is for the life of you, you leave the store anyway. Then, you drive halfway home and you suddenly remember the item. You get that funny "I know I'm forgetting something feeling" because the brain has an amazing ability to tap us on the shoulder when it finds that something isn't quite right. We experience this feeling as anxiety.

You'll probably find it useful to review in your mind the practical reasons that brought you to the decision. Recall the actual circumstances that led to the situation and try to avoid thinking about what could've or should've happened. Try to realize that you have done this as a matter of practicality and as a matter of priorities. You haven't done it because you want to shirk your past responsibilities, but because you want to prioritize your future responsibilities without a giant distraction hampering you for many years to come.

The other thing that I have promised to myself is that if I should ever meet with the good luck to have a great deal of money accumulated, I will remember the amount that was forgiven to me and pay it back plus interest to the parties I owed, or to a reputable charity.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_dissonance

[freshstart06]

Thank you, you made a lot of sense. I thought this feeling of guilt would go away but it manifest into something else. I use to be so proud that I did not have to file bk in the past but all awhile things were not getting better and with stress my health was not getting better. But in the same token I feel a great relief.

We did this pro se, we were well over the median and we made it, I should be happier then what I feel but all I can do is find things to worry about. I guess when I get the offical close of my case I will feel complete even though at this point I am pretty much done just have to wait for the administrative part to complete.

[SinkingFast]

I was overly paranoid thru the whole process, Fresh.

I wouldn't even use my Debit Card at Mickie Dee's or any place that was even remotely questionable. I didn't want copies of our bank statements in the hands of the Trustee with "eating out" charges showing.

Our paralegal said I was being "overly cautious".

I think it's similar to Post Traumatic Stress. You get used to looking over your shoulder,.......... Wondering if someone is gonna question your every move,........... And then it's all over.

It took us a while to relax afterward. Especially since we had to wait until the Trustee abandon our paltry Tax Refunds to get Closed, 4 months later.

[Minnymouth]

After our cases are discharged and closed, we still have a tendency to "look over our shoulders" to see if ANYTHING ELSE is going to happen. Fear of the Trustee reopening our cases for some reason, etc...... Guess its only human nature, huh!!!!

We still feel guilty about filing, but we know it was the right business decision to make to straighten out our lives.

In time, it will all pass, and you'll be back to "everyday living"....

[demismom]

I think it's TOTALLY normal. My DH still asks me from time to time "can I buy this?" LOL Yes, you can buy anything you want, as long as credit ain't involved, go for it! The credit part is me, nothing to do with BK in case any newbies are reading this.

I don't intend on getting any credit for a while, I plan on just watching my credit score. If it stalls out, I might get a gas card or something like that to build it up a bit. Then if/when it hits 700 we'll apply for a loan for the house we're buying on land contract.

Anyway, I think we get so used to having to make sure we do everything just right, that when that part of our live is done with, you can't just stop.

[inhocknow]

Hello, I am glad to hear that your case is almost closed.
I read on this thread however something. Can a case be re-opended after its closed?
Thanks for all of your help.

[freshstart06]

inhocknow, the only way a case can be reopened is if you reopened it or the BK trustee or UStrustee finds some serious fraud that a creditor lead to their attention. I think after 6 months after closing if you come into a huge amount of money that was pending before you file that can reopen your case as well.

the bottom line it is very rare.

I concluded yesterday that my worries may be due to that fact I just can't believe I am now debt free and starting over. I am in shock!!! I remember worrying myself sick over all of this and now it is finally over!!!

[Minnymouth]

YOUR ABSOLUTELY RIGHT - your in "shock" of being debt free............ and don't know quite how to handle that feeling!!! It's a whole new feeling in life.

Strange huh...............

[WantToBeDebtFre]

That's what's so great about this forum. It's to know I'm not the only one who feels like this. I'm feeling so much anxiety about my 341 coming up but I know there's not a whole lot I can do to prepare besides being honest. I keep thinking I'll feel so much relief at discharge but I could be like freshstart06 and that would be normal too, lol.

[freshstart06]

What is funny, during each phase I told meself if I get passed the 341 meeting I will stop worry, then if only if I get passed the trustee stated we were a no assets case things will get better, then I told myself well let me get passed the 60 days and I still feel worry but I don't know why until late last night it came to me I am really just
shocked!!!

I am shocked and just can't believe this is over, 4 long months of creating hell in my mind and it is finally over, yeah I have to wait for the offical close but I am at the point where it is just administrative, no one can no longer object to my closing because they had their chance LOL.

If everything goes the way I think, I should get my close on my birthday which is on Halloween.

[nc73]

YOUR ABSOLUTELY RIGHT - your in "shock" of being debt free............ and don't know quite how to handle that feeling!!! It's a whole new feeling in life.

Strange huh...............

I wouldn't call it debt free. IF I can even get a chpt 7, I'd still have 3 student loans totalling 32k. Clean slate my ass.

[lrprn]

Ok, for you, nc73, yours will just be a cleaner slate. It's still better than $32K owed PLUS a bunch of unsecured debt on top of it.

[nc73]

Ok, for you, nc73, yours will just be a cleaner slate. It's still better than $32K owed PLUS a bunch of unsecured debt on top of it.

I would be in another country paying a US debt. So sad...at LEAST the pound is stronger than the dollar. haha.

[chpxiii]

I wouldn't call it debt free. IF I can even get a chpt 7, I'd still have 3 student loans totalling 32k. Clean slate my ass.

Same here, nc73. I still have about $60k+ in student loan debt that I have not been paying on and will need to do so once I'm done with my 13. So I'm not free and clear either especially since it has been accruing interest this whole time.

Ok, for you, nc73, yours will just be a cleaner slate. It's still better than $32K owed PLUS a bunch of unsecured debt on top of it.

lrprn, interesting you say that because my boyfriend insists that student loan debt is GOOD debt. IMO, *any* debt is NOT GOOD. I hate owing people. HATE IT. I want to buy a house so I'll be doing the credit repair thing with getting credit cards but being very careful with them.

So I see your statement and you say that nc73's will be a cleaner slate. I don't understand why that is so. Both nc73 and I will STILL HAVE DEBT that is NOT discharchable (I know you know this ) and so it still doesn't mean we're free and clear. We still have a payment going out to someone and we still owe someone.

Myself, as mentioned above, I will still owe over $60k in student loans. I'm sure they're going to want my payment to be sky high, even higher than my chpt. 13 payments. I'm NOT looking forward to it.

So if I may ask, what is the basis for your statement to nc73? I'm not trying to challenge you. I just find it interesting that you say that considering that my boyfriend keeps insisting that my student loan debt is "good" debt and to not worry about it (but of course, do pay it.)