Almost a year into Ch13 Plan, marriage is faiing, what are my options?

[duclover]

OK, the skinny here is the wife and I are almost a year into our 5yr plan. The BK itself, along with several other factors have strained the marriage to the point where we are considering separating. (New York State by the way).

I'd have to think this isn't some rare occurrence given the stress a BK can cause, but after hours of google searches and pouring over posts on here I haven't been able to find out much in the way of possible outcomes to my particular situation.

I'll lay it out real quick. Have a house, and 2 kids. The current plan is a trial separation to see where that takes us in the marriage department. Would I be able to restructure my Ch13 plan to reflect the additional expenses of maintaining a 2nd residence for myself? I want her and the kids to stay in the house, and if moving out is going to put this in jeopardy I'll have to explore other avenues, because I want what is best for the kids, and am not about to have them suffer because of us.

I'm thinking we would have to go through some type of legal separation, in order to prove to trustee that this is legit, and not some back door scheme. I know I should be contacting my attorney, or the trustee about this, but neither are available at 11 pm on a Saturday night, and I'm the kinda guy that won't sleep without having some idea of how this all might play out.

Anybody out there in BK land ever go through or seen anything like this that can shed a little light on what my options are and what I can expect here? Any feedback is appreciated.

Thank you

[lrprn]

Anybody out there in BK land ever go through or seen anything like this that can shed a little light on what my options are and what I can expect here? Any feedback is appreciated.

First, I'm sorry you and your wife are having such a hard time right now.

I did a quick forum search using Advanced Search and 'separation' and 'seperation' as the search terms and found several threads that discussed what happens if joint Ch 13 filers separate:

http://www.bkforum.com/showthread.php?p=190303#poststop

http://www.bkforum.com/showthread.php?p=358012#poststop

http://www.bkforum.com/showthread.php?p=311662#poststop

Take a look through these and see if they help answer your questions about what might happen. Keep in mind that each of these threads involve people across many states that may have different 'rules' than your own in this situation.

Truly the only reliable answers for you are going to come from your own lawyer. Monday will come - do your best to keep your anxieties under control, because staying up all night with your stomach tied in knots is not going to change a thing except make you miserable. Until then, find a strong distraction (the Super Bowl??) and I hope the time goes by quickly for you before you can talk to your lawyer.

[Nanzee]

Well during my confirmation hearing (where we were not confirmed, but that is another story), there was one case similar to this. I live in NY by the way, in Town of Babylon - the trustee was objecting to a plan by a couple who were still married but not living together, and I don't believe they were "legally" separated but I am not sure. He was specifically objecting to the husband's apartment rent being listed as an expense - I think he was trying to say since they are trying to keep the home in the chapter 13, and lien-strip a second, his rent expenses were basically a "luxury". Then the judge asked the attorney if this is allowed, than would the court not have to allow paying for an apartment for another family member (I assume he meant a child, or grandparent), and how is this fair? I am sure I am not using the exact words, but that was definitely the gist of it - the attorney argued well enough that there case was delayed for further review until March. I am also going back in March, but in my case it was due to the 2nd mortgage objection of our lien-strip, so maybe I will see these people again. Anyway, just offering what I observed (I am no "expert", this is all new to me too) - like Irprn said you will have to speak with your attorney, and I agree about trying to be calm about it until then.

[nickifan]

First, I'm sorry you and your wife are having such a hard time right now.

I did a quick forum search using Advanced Search and 'separation' and 'seperation' as the search terms and found several threads that discussed what happens if joint Ch 13 filers separate:

http://www.bkforum.com/showthread.php?p=190303#poststop

http://www.bkforum.com/showthread.php?p=358012#poststop

http://www.bkforum.com/showthread.php?p=311662#poststop

Take a look through these and see if they help answer your questions about what might happen. Keep in mind that each of these threads involve people across many states that may have different 'rules' than your own in this situation.

Truly the only reliable answers for you are going to come from your own lawyer. Monday will come - do your best to keep your anxieties under control, because staying up all night with your stomach tied in knots is not going to change a thing except make you miserable. Until then, find a strong distraction (the Super Bowl??) and I hope the time goes by quickly for you before you can talk to your lawyer.

I have nothing to offer the OP but my sympathy...and a hug for wanting to do the best for his kids.
I just really wanted to give a little shoutout to lrprn for her (?yes?) response. I think you write the most thoughtful and helpful posts...and with a detail-oriented approach after my own heart, even noting that one needs to search on "seperation" (wrong spelling) as well as "separation."

ALL the mods, truly, are such a help. This forum is a sanity saver in many ways.

So, a small "thank you!" from a future BK filer.

[duclover]

Thank you lrprn, Nanzee, and Nikifan, I appreciate the responses. I had seen one of those threads... never thought of trying to search for the misspelling of separation!!

I have kinda taken a deep breath. I composed a lengthy email to my attorney who filed the case for us. He was just fantastic when we filed and was very diligent and worked very hard for us. I have the utmost faith and confidence in him. Of course I got the auto reply that he is out of the office til Tuesday, so I guess I'll have to stand pat for a few days before I get the answers we are so desperately searching for.

Rest assured I will report back here as to what I find out. In hopes that somewhere down the line someone in a similar situation will benefit from it. It's what there forums are all about, people helping people. I truly appreciate it.