Yet another question. Vacation prior to filing.

[mslaw]

Sorry to be a board hog. We took a small family vacation in April. It was already partially paid for since before Christmas and the deposit was not refundable. At that time, we had no clue we were going to file Chapter 7. We were trying to make things work. Then I found out my hours were going to be cut this summer and we found out the house we were trying to sell was now worth more than 60K less than we owed on it. So after looking at our finances and talking to an atty, we opted to file. Will the trustee see this vacation from April and make an issue of it? It was a beach vacation and we spent $700 on the house for the week to rent and didn't do anything other than go to the beach. Was it the smartest thing to do? Probably not but we were so stressed out all the time that we so desperately needed to get away for a week. Looking back now, I wouldn't have done it. Now I am super stressed about this. This whole process is giving me an ulcer. I called our attorney but haven't heard back so I thought maybe you resourceful people could give me some feedback. Thanks!

(please no flaming ... we realize how messed up our finances have been and that we are mostly to blame for this) Thanks.

[LadyInTheRed]

Bad financial decisions aren't a violation of the bankruptcy code. If you spent cash for your vacation, it won't be an issue, except that you may need to explain any large cash withdrawals to show you are not hiding assets. If you used credit cards for the vacation, it's best to make sure you didn't charge $500 to any one creditor within 90 days of filing BK or take cash advances from any one creditor within 70 days of filing. Charges that meet those criteria would be presumed non-dischargeable IF the creditor objects to their discharge.

[keepmine]

Nobody cares about a family vacation as long as you didn't finance it with credit cards.
Let your lawyer know but I doubt it's a problem.

[mslaw]

OK thank you both. Can you tell this has me completely unhinged? Not to mention, the bank we are filing on with our mortgage is a small lender and they "know" us and the president of the bank called my husband today and gave him a verbal lashing saying "So let me get this straight, you are going to file bankruptcy when I have seen from facebook that you are not living a frugal life". My husband was in shock. We actually do live quite a frugal life except for that very budgeted vacation. It was paid for with a check from our checking account. We haven't used a CC in close to a year. Most of our CC debt is from 5+ years ago (over 20K) and we just cannot get it paid off at the interest rates they are charging us. I do not know how this man knew about our vacation because he is not a facebook friend. The only thing I did was post some pics of our kids on the beach. For all he knew, it was paid for by the grandparents. Sigh. This is just so stressful. I've been having chest pain and heart palpitations. This sucks.

[keepsmiling]

ACK. the pitfalls of FB. Lesson- be VERY careful what you put out there....
Having said that, 700 for a family vacation is pretty darn frugal. Don't let this guy guilt you. Screw that. Everyone's entitled to a life, and it's none of his bloody business. Frankly he's got some major cojones to say that..... but at least you are now prepared for more from other quarters, if it comes

[mslaw]

ACK. the pitfalls of FB. Lesson- be VERY careful what you put out there....
Having said that, 700 for a family vacation is pretty darn frugal. Don't let this guy guilt you. Screw that. Everyone's entitled to a life, and it's none of his bloody business. Frankly he's got some major cojones to say that..... but at least you are now prepared for more from other quarters, if it comes

Yes. Of course, as mentioned, when we took the vacation, we didn't know this would be our fate. But alas, hindsight right? This guy used to be a family friend and he has really screwed us over on some loans we had with him including a mortgage interest rate of almost 8%. And refusing to renogatiate the loan. So yes, major cojones. Also, he has to trashing us to other people to even know about the vacation because as I said, he is not even on facebook. Oh well. At least I can relax a bit. Thank you all again! This forum is awesome!

[AngelinaCat]

We took our customary vacation, which we have for 17 years, about a month before we filed. It was to another state, to which we drove and stayed two weeks. It cost 2K, which we had saved and budgeted for. There were no questions of any kind about this.

Regarding FB, I suggest closing your page down and staying off it. We were victims of cyber-stalking and cyber-bullying via another site, for nine years. This site was not FB, but the experience has put such a bad taste in our mouths about social networking, that we avoid them. Joining this forum has been a rare exception.

Good wishes to you.

[mslaw]

We took our customary vacation, which we have for 17 years, about a month before we filed. It was to another state, to which we drove and stayed two weeks. It cost 2K, which we had saved and budgeted for. There were no questions of any kind about this.

Regarding FB, I suggest closing your page down and staying off it. We were victims of cyber-stalking and cyber-bullying via another site, for nine years. This site was not FB, but the experience has put such a bad taste in our mouths about social networking, that we avoid them. Joining this forum has been a rare exception.

Good wishes to you.

Thank you.

I would close my FB page and have wished to many times, but I have a photography business (albeit small) and I do get most of my business and word of mouth from FB. It's a love/hate relationship. I will be more careful from this point forward about what I share though. Thanks again!

[hmsmith]

We took a vacation last week, and we are in the 60 day club (had our 341 about 5 weeks ago). I never even gave it a thought....but then again the beach house paid for by my parents as was all the groceries/food for the week. We NEEDED this vacation so bad ----as I about gave myself an ulcer throughout this whole bankruptcy process too. I have also had heart palpatations and ended up having a stress test done, (i'm in my 30's) and found out it's just from stress. Needless to say I'm ready for it to be over! I don't think you need to worry since you didn't use a credit card to pay for your vacation. I know it's hard but really, don't lose sleep over this!

[memama]

mslaw,
My anxiety has been so bad through this whole process that my doctor prescribed me a sedative...so I think I can related to the "unhinged" feeling :P

First of all, if the trustee asks about the vacation, just be honest! You have a paper trail, so try not to worry *too* much about it. And it wasn't like this was some crazy fancy vacation to Hawaii for a week that cost you thousands of dollars.

Second of all, I'm quite a meek and understated person and I don't "do" confrontation...but if I had any sort of bank manager/president talking like that to me, I don't CARE if they knew me personally or not, I would have come unglued if they talked to me like that. I was a paying customer...they are in a position where they are expected to act respectfully and professionally. Honestly, I wish I had the opportunity to speak with the president of the bank that serviced my mortgage...hehehehehe

[shotgun7]

Are you keeping the house, or letting it go? Depending on your state, 5 years+ may be out of the SOL, Just a thought...

[Drazil65]

Hi, can you create a web page (use one of the very afforded web site builders out there) just for your business? Set it up and then post the website on FB and direct your customers and business over to the site. Then SHUT DOWN FB. I have heard more issues about people getting into trouble with their personal business (via pictures posted, chatting, people asking questions on there etc) being posted all over FB. Someone that is a friend could have told the bank guys secretary who told the bank guy etc....like the telephone game arggggg...

We also have a friend who is our mortgage guy at a small bank here in town. He also called once we stopped paying on the house (about 2 months into it I guess) and we told him husband filed chp 7. He was not happy and his whole attitude towards us changed of course. But this is just the way it is and this guy became strictly a business acquaintance from that moment on. We told him this is our decision (when he started with his attitude on the phone) and the best one for our family. We also informed him that we could not discuss this over the phone with him as husband had already filed, he said goodbye and hung up. So be it, we cannot worry about anyone else, it is what it is and it was the best decision for us period! Good Luck!

[Tater]

I think there is a lot of guilt during the bk process. At least, there has been for my husband and I. Like you, we tried for years to pay off debt and work with creditors. We have realized what got us into this situation, aka our poor financial decisions. Bankruptcy is a fresh start for us and we look at it as a business decision. I'm sorry the guy at the bank treated you that way. It's just plain wrong but don't let other people's opinions get to you. It did me when my whole family found out and started treating me like the devil's spawn. It didn't change our minds about filing and we felt great relief when we did. Our family still is not talking to us but that is their choice.

We aren't losing sleep at night. We just filed last week but already things are getting better for us. For the first time in years, we've see a light at the end of the tunnel. Hang in there!

[pamkev]

Tater,
I was hoping your family would come around. Why do people think money defines us? It is so sad it's not affecting their life in anyway and it was your choice, your life your family and you made the decision which was best for you not them

Pam

[frogger]

Speaking of the evil known as facebook, you might find this interesting:

Monday, 4 Jun 2012 | 11:50 AM ET

Facebook will lose dominance as a major web company in less than a decade, Eric Jackson, founder of Ironfire Capital said Monday on CNBC's Squawk on the Street.

"In five to eight years they are going to disappear in the way that Yahoo has disappeared," Jackson said. "Yahoo is still making money, it's still profitable, still has 13,000 employees working for it, but it's 10 percent of the value that it was at the height of 2000. For all intents and purposes, it's disappeared."

Jackson said there have been three generations of web companies. The first generation was big web portals, such as Yahoo, where content was aggregated in one place. The second was the social web with Facebook and the third generation is companies focused entirely on monetizing the mobile platform, something Facebook will continue to struggle with, Jackson said.

"When you look over these three generations, no matter how successful you are in one generation, you don't seem to be able to translate that into success in the second generation, no matter how much money you have in the bank, no matter how many smart PhDs you have working for you," Jackson said. "Look at how Google has struggled moving into social, and I think Facebook is going to have the same kind of challenges moving into mobile."

Last month Facebook acknowledged its mobile challenge in a regulatory filing. The company stated that the growing number of mobile users using Facebook is hard to monetize and "may negatively affect our revenue and financial results."

Jackson's comments on the future of the social network come at a time when Facebook's stock is down about 27 percent from its IPO price of $38 a share, making it the biggest two-week loss of any IPO since 1995.

"The world is moving faster, it's getting more competitive, not less, and I think those who are dominant in their prior generation are really going to have a hard time moving into this newer generation," he said. "Facebook can buy a bunch of mobile companies, but they are still a big, fat website and that's different from a mobile app."

http://www.cnbc.com/id/47674474

Posting this in news as well....