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    Suicide and Financial Loss

    On the front page of my local newspaper there is an article today explaining a 102% increase in calls to a suicide hotline in the first 5 months of 2008. One man, a subcontractor, called saying he was going to kill his family and then himself because of an impending foreclosure to his home. This is sad and one of the repercussions of an economy that is in a recession. I remember people killing themselves back in 87' when the Stock Market took a dive and I am sure the suicide rate has always spiked up in bad economic woes. But why? Is it because people cant come to terms with losing worldly possessions? Is is because people have made owning a home and car the standard of success? I see alot of people post on here feeling ashamed and hopeless that they are going to lose their houses and possessions. Are these things worth your life? Absolutely not. I remember a post about a woman losing her house and coming to the conclusion that what really makes a home is not the house but her family, and wherever that family goes the love goes with it. People need to start detaching themselves from the materialism of this world and realizing there are more important things than houses, car, boats, etc., and being indifferent to the stigma of bankruptcy that society places on those individuals. Stop making bankruptcy personal! You are no less a person because of it, remember that.
    "Paper is poverty,... it is only the ghost of money, and not money itself." --Thomas Jefferson to Edward Carrington, 1788

    #2
    Clap, Clap, Clap, Bravo. You have potential to become a 'believer' yet. LOL

    Very good observation. I lost 50K on my 401k in 87. It's only numbers. I've read and heard of people in '29 jumping out of windows. Money is only a tool to get by. You can't eat it, and it represents time, or goods. A trading medium. When inflation eats it up, that is all that is left numbers. A VERY good post. I hope it hits everyone as it has I. 'Hub
    If I knew it all, would I be here?? Hang in there = Retained attorney 8-06, Filed 12-28-07, Discharge 8-13-08, Finally CLOSED 11-3-09, 3-31-10 AP Dismissed, Informed by incompetent lawyer of CLOSED status, October 14, 2010.

    Comment


      #3
      What a beautiful post you created.


      Originally posted by bmrigs View Post
      On the front page of my local newspaper there is an article today explaining a 102% increase in calls to a suicide hotline in the first 5 months of 2008. One man, a subcontractor, called saying he was going to kill his family and then himself because of an impending foreclosure to his home. This is sad and one of the repercussions of an economy that is in a recession. I remember people killing themselves back in 87' when the Stock Market took a dive and I am sure the suicide rate has always spiked up in bad economic woes. But why? Is it because people cant come to terms with losing worldly possessions? Is is because people have made owning a home and car the standard of success? I see alot of people post on here feeling ashamed and hopeless that they are going to lose their houses and possessions. Are these things worth your life? Absolutely not. I remember a post about a woman losing her house and coming to the conclusion that what really makes a home is not the house but her family, and wherever that family goes the love goes with it. People need to start detaching themselves from the materialism of this world and realizing there are more important things than houses, car, boats, etc., and being indifferent to the stigma of bankruptcy that society places on those individuals. Stop making bankruptcy personal! You are no less a person because of it, remember that.

      Comment


        #4
        I saw 2 different posters on suicide at the hospital yesterday, giving people a hotline to call & that those who know someone thinking about it should also call because they can bring hope, even if just for a day that gives them something to look forward to.

        But why? Is it because people cant come to terms with losing worldly possessions?
        I think it has to do more with enduring pain & when the pain increases to a certain level & the scale never tips back any hope or pleasure that is when people become suicidal. Suicide is a very real thing that some people make a mockery out of because they do not understand the reality of a scale that never tips in their favor & they find no other way out of some very sad situations.

        It is proven that suicide is linked to financial stress & loss, but there are other reasons of loss & infliction that make people become suicidal, like children being taken from them, physical pain, abusive relationship.
        I doubt very many people would know how to properly handle a situation involving sucidal thoughts & ignoring it or putting people down laughing is the worse thing someone can do.

        But for those who have felt it, or have know someone who has tried, it is very real.

        A good discussion starter.

        Comment


          #5
          I think it has more to do with the feeling of utter failure and worthlessness - the financial part being a contributor maybe, but not the actual reason.

          Family issues, loss of loved ones or failed relationships contribute to the feeling as well.

          And yes, the pain is very real. Sometimes, of course, in trying to deal with the pain and the feeling of failure, alcohol or drugs are used, which further impair judgment.

          We had a close friend who was devastated over a failed relationship, as well as other factors. My husband had actually saved him from suicide once.

          But the last time, he had gotten drunk, was on the phone to ex-wife, and this time, he had a gun and used it while on the phone with her.

          Extremely sad, because he was a really good person and father of 5 children - they were devastated.

          Also, his own mother had taken that way out of life when he was a child, so I think the idea was put in his head back then.
          Filed Ch 7 -- July 9, 2008
          341 mtg ---- August 14, 2008
          Discharged ---- October 17, 2008
          Closed --------- December 11, 2009!

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by AngelinaCatHub View Post
            Clap, Clap, Clap, Bravo. You have potential to become a 'believer' yet. LOL

            'Hub
            LOL... I was worried I would come off as having a heart ;-)
            "Paper is poverty,... it is only the ghost of money, and not money itself." --Thomas Jefferson to Edward Carrington, 1788

            Comment


              #7
              i think suicide becomes a 'real' option to people when they are exhausted and see no end in sight; stressed and anxious and feel they have no other viable options; have traveled one or more paths and still see life going nowhere they want to be; lonely and unsure of their value.

              scarily, i've had quite a few solid thoughts in this realm in the last year. i'm hoping bk will dispell the majority of the stress and anxiety, and feeling like a failure. if not, i've got problems. but i've decided to push those off for a future date, and not worry about them today. best tshirt i ever read said, "why worry about tomorrow if you can't make it through today?"

              i'm living it.
              Filed 7/28/08, Discharged 10/29/08
              (filed pro se: nonconsumer no asset CH7)

              Comment


                #8
                My older brother committed suicide in 1990, when he was 30. I believe it was mental problems rather than financial (I think he was bipolar, but never diagnosed, because he certainly cycled through moods like no one I've ever met before or since then, and used drugs and alcohol to self-medicate.)

                Anyhow, while off the subject of BK and financial issues, I just wanted to post here to soleprop since his/her post mentioned having quite a few solid thoughts in this realm. I just wanted to let you know that I understand you are in pain, but suicide is a very permanent solution to what are almost always temporary problems. My brother's death devastated my family, I watched my parents age 20 years overnight, and my father never recovered from it (my Mom was equally hurt, but her faith in her religion helped her carry on). My Dad died in 99 feeling like a failure as a person because his son was so miserable and he wasn't able to make it right for him. My siblings and I all suffered from mixtures of grief, anger, bitterness, guilt, sorrow, you name the emotion, we have lived it. I had nightmares for years, and still occasionaly have them though much less frequently now.

                I know my brother was thinking of his own pain when he did this, not intending to hurt us but just to end his own angst, but the outcome was that he made all those who really loved him suffer tremendously. As the survivor of a loved one who committed suicide, I just wanted to say that I am sure your friends and family love you too, so ifyou continue to struggle with these thoughts, please seek help. There are all kinds of hotlines and counselors and services out there, most requiring little to no fees, and it would be the best gift you could give your loved ones and yourself.

                Take care.
                Filed CH 13 September 17, 2007
                Plan Modified July 8, 2009 from $1100/month to $400/month due to change in income, finally discharged in July of 2013!

                Comment


                  #9
                  I forgot to mention that the man never went through with his plans. He was talked out of it after 83 minutes on the phone with a counselor. Lets hope it stays that way.
                  "Paper is poverty,... it is only the ghost of money, and not money itself." --Thomas Jefferson to Edward Carrington, 1788

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Even a homeless man's body is still worth more than a suicide man's dead body... at least that homeless man still have GUTS to live on... and on.. etc... while the suicider is WEAKER mental looser!!

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Thanks for this story. It is exactly right on the money and is such a shame others don't see what is really important.

                      Just a moment here to say my daughter is expecting another baby. This one is due in March and that is what life is all about. I am so excited! The circle of life is so awesome!!

                      Not to say I don't like my house, I do. Fornately we have been able to remain smart with our house and kept our rates low. Fixed 5.25% first mortgage, 25 yrs to go, second 9 yrs to go, 7% fixed, even a little equity that is safe in our BK. Our payment is reasonable, and we would be paying the same in rent if we moved.

                      Here's a story that fits this story so well. It's sad beyond belief. I first heard this on the radio the day it happened, and it broke my heart. What saddened me the most is that this poor women couldn't see a way out. Her poor family I am sure would have accepted the loss of the home much better then the can accept the loss of her.


                      Woman Facing Foreclosure Commits Suicide
                      Potential Buyers Arrive At Property While Body Still Inside

                      POSTED: 9:43 am EDT July 23, 2008
                      UPDATED: 5:22 pm EDT July 23, 2008
                      [NEWSVINE: Woman Facing Foreclosure Commits Suicide] [DELICIOUS: Woman Facing Foreclosure Commits Suicide] [DIGG: Woman Facing Foreclosure Commits Suicide] [FACEBOOK: Woman Facing Foreclosure Commits Suicide] [REDDIT: Woman Facing Foreclosure Commits Suicide] [RSS] [PRINT: Woman Facing Foreclosure Commits Suicide] [EMAIL: Woman Facing Foreclosure Commits Suicide]
                      BOSTON -- A Taunton woman committed suicide Tuesday hours before her mortgage company was scheduled to auction off her home.

                      Carlene Balderrama, 53, sent a fax to her mortgage company threatening suicide earlier in the day. The company was planning to sell her foreclosed home at 5 p.m.

                      Police found Balderrama dead in her home at 103 Duffy Drive after employees at the mortgage company who received the fax called police.

                      Officials said that in a suicide note found next to her body, Balderrama told her husband and son to "take the insurance money and pay for the house."

                      Taunton Police Department Chief Raymond O'Berg said that the woman's husband may not have been aware of the family's financial problems because Balderrama "handled all of the bills."

                      Balderrama was granted an extension, but the police chief said that he was surprised when potential buyers showed up at the home, while Balderrama's body was still inside, expecting an auction.

                      In the past year, foreclosures in Massachusetts have soared 66 percent, and families are being forced out of their homes at record rates, leaving properties either on the auction block or abandoned.

                      Foreclosure deeds -- the final step in the process -- were up 107.5 percent in May, from 677 in May 2007 to 1,405, according to the Warren Group. Year-to-date deeds rose 139.6 percent, from 2,327 in the first five months of 2007 to 5,576 this ye
                      Filed Chapter 7 June 4 ~ 341 July 20 ~Last day of objections Sept 18~Discharged/Closed Sept 21

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Originally posted by BKOnce View Post
                        Even a homeless man's body is still worth more than a suicide man's dead body... at least that homeless man still have GUTS to live on... and on.. etc... while the suicider is WEAKER mental looser!!
                        Damn BKOnce, you may get flamed by some on here for that one.....
                        "Paper is poverty,... it is only the ghost of money, and not money itself." --Thomas Jefferson to Edward Carrington, 1788

                        Comment


                          #13
                          From someone who knows.....

                          Bankruptcy, just like any other major stressor, can easily lead a person to suicide. I would think that usually there is some underlying mental illness, some instability that makes the act acceptable to the person committing it. In reading many books on stress, bankruptcy is up there with marriage, divorce, close death in the family, and birth of a child in terms of the stress levels that they cause. It is a major life event, and this board just proves it. Unlike Bkone, there is no weakness in suicide, there is only illness.

                          Personal story: I've attempted suicide twice, and am diagnosed with bi-polar disorder. My last attempt had a little to do with my financial situation, as I had become angry with the amount of money and time I was spending on doctors and Rx's, so I stopped seeing and taking either.(there were other problems, but finances did not help a bit). This obviously was a bad decision, and one I've recovered from, and am in the process of rectifying. This board has helped show that there IS light at the end of the tunnel, and that people do recover from this without major problems in their life. It has made BK acceptable in my mind.

                          So, in closing, don't be so quick to judge. People make brash decisions in times of high stress, and sometimes those decisions affect the people around them in ways the actor never considered, or was even capable of considering.
                          Pre-Filing Credit Scores:
                          Mine - 705 DW - 715
                          Filed 08/09/2008
                          341 09/25/2008

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Originally posted by BKOnce View Post
                            Even a homeless man's body is still worth more than a suicide man's dead body... at least that homeless man still have GUTS to live on... and on.. etc... while the suicider is WEAKER mental looser!!
                            That is not being very nice & I always thought you were a nice person. So you are just joking? Right?

                            I feel it takes way more courage to jump from a 100 story building than to stay drunk, lazy & laying is some stink gutter.
                            My mother tried to kill herself twice for problems that you have no idea she has been through & she is today one of the strongest people that I know...so I would not call her a weak mental loser. Though she failed her attempts, she has plenty of gutts to live on.

                            Have you been homeless yet?
                            Have you had suicidal thoughts?
                            Do you know a close friend or family member who has killed themself, or tried to kill themself?

                            Comment


                              #15
                              I saw on TV where the police were saying when they go to a home to give them the paperwork or whatever it is they do, they have to listen at the door to make sure no gun goes off. And once they are in the home they have to search the whole house for guns.

                              They were also saying that people killing themselves over their homes is very common now.

                              I think that is sad that people associate their self worth with their home. If I were to ever lose a home, I would be at the door with keys in hand ready to leave.
                              Last edited by Cali; 07-28-2008, 02:34 PM.

                              Comment

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