Question of Importance. WHY do some.........

[AngelinaCatHub]

As a busy person, I don't always keep up as I should as my case is closed.

I have many duties, but, when I come here, I see some real problem.

I see many who come to the BEST BANKRUPTCY FORUM, to ask a question. AND, when they do not get the answer expected, they either ask it again in different wording, or get PIZZED OFF, for not getting the answer they desire.

We are NOT here to be professional. I outlived my profession but in my age, I have learned much. In BK I certainly have learned. BUT, I am not paid to take B.S. from a person I sincerely give my best advice, experience and history. (as well as precious time.)

I am interested in hearing comments referencing my frustration with those who you put your time and heart into, then just argue the point of why you are either wrong, or don't no STiT about what they say.

Just my own curiosity, as well as frustration. 'Hub

Please add your feelings on this subject.

[BrokeinMD]

Hi Hub - Care to share some examples, or is this just a blanket public spanking?

[AngelinaCatHub]

Hi Hub - Care to share some examples, or is this just a blanket public spanking?

Thank you for asking but no I cannot. It is blanket. If you have been here or will be here, you will see for yourself.

Thank you also for your input. 'Hub

EDIT: LOL. NO it is NOT a public spanking, only an observation of frustration. lol.

[debee]

Door #1: People are emotional over bk and they pop off and go nuts and take it out on somebody (whoever) that they think can take it, or that they don't like, or that they secretly have a crazy mad crush on. (It's the mustache you know, drives 'em wild).

Door #2: People who are looking for help committing fraud aren't nice to start with, so we shouldn't expect them to play nice here.

Door #3: Anonymity gives the coward a weapon? Spoiled child becomes spoiled adult? Zonk?

[BrokeinMD]

Ok, Hub. I'll keep that in mind. You have some dirt on your collar, so understand that people come on here green, scared, looking for answers, wanting them yesterday, and you can only share your experience, unless you got a j.d., have practiced in all jurisdictions and you have a paypal account. LOL!!!! Your responses to some of my posts, while I may not have liked them, made me think. Please don't leave out of frustration. Just please remember where you were when you first were in this mess.

[clevelandmom]

Ah 'Hub, your frustration comes out of your genuinely wanting to help people and not have them make the same mistakes you did. Your frustration sounds like nothing different than a parent/child relationship. We can tell them time and time again what NOT to do, what TO do, and sometimes they just won't learn until they make the mistake for themselves and learn the hard way. You're a good person - you would rather save them the anguish. But unfortunately, you can't save everyone. Just remember for every 1 person who has given you crap, there are 50 of us who have benefited from your knowledge. The ones who are giving you crap are the "teenagers" of this forum - they think they know EVERYTHING! LOL. Hang in there - you know we all luv ya!

[HHM]

It goes with the territory I suppose.

I have been on this forum since 2004 and have seen EVERYTHING. My interest in the forum wanes at times for the reasons you propose, but at the same time, I love offering a comment that I know the person doesn't want to hear, it is kinda fun because in the long run, they will look back and say; that HHM on the forum ended up being right, I wish I would have listened.

Also, I don't answer as many questions as I used too (especially the "simple" questions, I let other get those and only address those issues that are interesting).

[AngelinaCatHub]

OMG! Not what I meant at all. You can't drive me off:

Ok, Hub. I'll keep that in mind. You have some dirt on your collar, so understand that people come on here green, scared, looking for answers, wanting them yesterday, and you can only share your experience, unless you got a j.d., have practiced in all jurisdictions and you have a paypal account. LOL!!!! Your responses to some of my posts, while I may not have liked them, made me think. Please don't leave out of frustration. Just please remember where you were when you first were in this mess.

Yes my friend, you are right. Unless you have followed me/we for some time, you have NO IDEA how ignorant we were as well as a very incompetent lawyers.

Door #1: People are emotional over bk and they pop off and go nuts and take it out on somebody (whoever) that they think can take it, or that they don't like, or that they secretly have a crazy mad crush on. (It's the mustache you know, drives 'em wild).

Door #2: People who are looking for help committing fraud aren't nice to start with, so we shouldn't expect them to play nice here.

Door #3: Anonymity gives the coward a weapon? Spoiled child becomes spoiled adult? Zonk?

I love that lip curl. I didn't realize you have a 'mad crush' on me but, you know, I'm a marred man. (no misspelling). LOL.
Yes it is fairly easy to pick out those who wish advice on how to beat the system. This is not what this place is about and it will never happen here.

Ah 'Hub, your frustration comes out of your genuinely wanting to help people and not have them make the same mistakes you did. Your frustration sounds like nothing different than a parent/child relationship. We can tell them time and time again what NOT to do, what TO do, and sometimes they just won't learn until they make the mistake for themselves and learn the hard way. You're a good person - you would rather save them the anguish. But unfortunately, you can't save everyone. Just remember for every 1 person who has given you crap, there are 50 of us who have benefited from your knowledge. The ones who are giving you crap are the "teenagers" of this forum - they think they know EVERYTHING! LOL. Hang in there - you know we all luv ya!

Thank you my friend. I understand where you come from. It is unfortunate that what you stated, and on an online blog, is exactly what got me to lose a fortune and go to bk. However, I am in the latter part of life, and that is only a learning phase. (we are never to old to learn) I am not in despair, I am not leaving the Forum in any way, I am frustrated, true, and curious as well. I pray that I have helped some if not all. I realize you "can't win 'em all". But I shall try for a while. That while will only be limited by my time and life.

I did not mean to say what has been read into my post. However, thank you. In God's love; 'Hub.

[BrokeinMD]

Good, I'm glad to hear it, Hub! You've got your disclaimer at the bottom of your post. Maybe I'll update mine, too, with "Take it for what it's worth, just my experience....blah, blah blah". We have no audio here, so you can only respond to what you see before you. Plus, people read the written word and intrepret it differently, sometimes. And, maybe there are scammers, looking to get around the system lurking around, too, and if they get pissed, so be it. I'm just glad you won't go away because somebody didn't like what you say. Just check in every once in a while because us Newbie's need you so we don't have to keep running to the doc for more Xanax! LOL!!!!

[dneil]

Perhaps it is something to do with you having knowledge about bankruptcy and us (well me) not having so much knowledge. Typically, if I don't understand an answer I will attempt to clarify that answer with another question. People like myself... excessive worry syndrome (I made that up) tend to ask question after question even though I receive the same answer. Well, sometimes I do ;)

For example: I didn't understand the situation of judgments and why a judgment still stands when someone is discharged and no longer owes the money that the judgment was based on. Argh. It irritates me that I still have to worry after I paid an attorney to take care of stuff. However, I am thankful for this site because I wouldn't have known about the importance to file a motion to vacate (otherwise known as "set a aside") a judgment is. Now that I know, I have shot an email out to my attorney asking him if his office does this and if so, what the charge is. And if not, what he knows to be the procedure. I want that off records at the court. blah.

Sorry to hear of your frustrations.... I hope your night mellows and that you find yourself stress free and less frustrated.

[free2breathe]

Hub, I've often struggled with the idea that some people reply to answers with either condescension or argument when they feel the answer they've been given doesn't fit the 'mold' of the answer they were looking for. I've come to the absolute realization that any answer I give to an OP on this forum is given from a positive place with nothing but the best of motives. I have been known to dig into researching a topic to try to help. I don't have to use my time that way....it's a choice, and it can be offensive when someone responds to that with a less than grateful demeanor. Through a couple others on this forum, I've come to realize that the responses of those who seem ungrateful or downright rude just need to get flushed down the proverbial toilet.

I so appreciate seeing that I'm not the only one who has had this sort of a reaction to reading the sort of responses you refer to at the beginning of this thread. I can also honestly say that I've found more good on this forum than negative, and that is why I will continue to do my best to give advice or help research answers to the very best of my limited ability.

ramble over

[Peeps]

Hub,

Sorry to hear you're frustrated by some of this. I'm still a newbie here and there are times when I've been sorely tempted to leave snarky comments for people who are stomping around the forum acting like total brats. OK, sometimes I am unable to resist temptation. Generally I don't usually feel too bad about it.

I think in some ways it's a product of our information age. We expect fast answers to our problems. Heck, in other forums I've seen people actually post questions about whether or not they should go to the emergency room and then wait for total strangers with no medical training to tell them what to do! It's as if, as a society, we're getting more technically savvy but turning into complete fools. Uh, except for some of the fine folks here, of course! We talk to a computer and forget that on the other side of the screen someone has just given up fifteen minutes of their life to provide a thoughtful answer.

Did you know that teachers aren't supposed to correct school tests with red pens anymore because it might hurt the feelings (red, being an adversarial color) of the student who got the question wrong? Whenever someone here can't handle the answers to their question, I just assume they're green-pen kids. They'll go away when they don't hear what they want to hear. And when the chorus doesn't sing: "Oh you're so brilliant! Wow, after seeing this for X-many years, no one else has EVER thought of that!! You're a GENIUS!!" And then they will get their butts kicked by a trustee somewhere. Sometimes people just need to learn the hard way.

You can't save everyone. But you do get points for trying. Know that at the end of the day you're part of something very meaningful to a lot of people and you've probably helped more than you'll ever know. Thanks for what you do.

[chicagoannie]

'Hub, I think there are also people who are simply not forum-experienced. If someone has never posted to a group and they are scared and/or impatient for answers...well...multiple posting (and "pizziness") happens!

[BrokeinMD]

Amen, Free2Breathe. I felt like a little kid lost and alone in the woods until I came to this place. Since I'm an adult, calling "Mommy, Help Me!" doesn't work anymore, but do I wish it did! I will do my best to help others feeling that desperation as long as I can, or until I can't afford the cable anymore. LOL!!!!

[AngelinaCatHub]

Well, I said it before. I am not leaving 'yet'. It is my pleasure here but I was curious only. But I am pleased to see that others understand and you folks will be here when I will not. GBWY

Perhaps it is something to do with you having knowledge about bankruptcy and us (well me) not having so much knowledge. Typically, if I don't understand an answer I will attempt to clarify that answer with another question. People like myself... excessive worry syndrome (I made that up) tend to ask question after question even though I receive the same answer. Well, sometimes I do ;)

That is recognizable, but when a question is rephrased obviously not to clear the point, but to get a better answer, it is easily obvious.

For example: I didn't understand the situation of judgments and why a judgment still stands when someone is discharged and no longer owes the money that the judgment was based on. Argh. It irritates me that I still have to worry after I paid an attorney to take care of stuff. However, I am thankful for this site because I wouldn't have known about the importance to file a motion to vacate (otherwise known as "set a aside") a judgment is. Now that I know, I have shot an email out to my attorney asking him if his office does this and if so, what the charge is. And if not, what he knows to be the procedure. I want that off records at the court. blah.

This is well. From this Forum you learned not to forget each "dot & tiddle". That a bit missed could come up and bite you in the future. This is what we are here for.

Sorry to hear of your frustrations.... I hope your night mellows and that you find yourself stress free and less frustrated.

Yes, it has. And for the sake of likes of you folks (and a bit of Merlot).

Hub, I've often struggled with the idea that some people reply to answers with either condescension or argument when they feel the answer they've been given doesn't fit the 'mold' of the answer they were looking for. I've come to the absolute realization that any answer I give to an OP on this forum is given from a positive place with nothing but the best of motives. I have been known to dig into researching a topic to try to help. I don't have to use my time that way....it's a choice, and it can be offensive when someone responds to that with a less than grateful demeanor. Through a couple others on this forum, I've come to realize that the responses of those who seem ungrateful or downright rude just need to get flushed down the proverbial toilet.

Truer words.... Thank you for that, but this thread is NOT about me. It is about WHY WE ARE HERE? I am curious only in that I have been frustrated at times with those who, however we try, will not get off their proverbial azz to either listen to experience or ask whom they pay BIG money to.


I so appreciate seeing that I'm not the only one who has had this sort of a reaction to reading the sort of responses you refer to at the beginning of this thread. I can also honestly say that I've found more good on this forum than negative, and that is why I will continue to do my best to give advice or help research answers to the very best of my limited ability.

We depend on new submitters here. It is what keeps this place alive. I miss those who helped me and are now long gone. You are the future to help others.

ramble over

Hub,

Sorry to hear you're frustrated by some of this. I'm still a newbie here and there are times when I've been sorely tempted to leave snarky comments for people who are stomping around the forum acting like total brats. OK, sometimes I am unable to resist temptation. Generally I don't usually feel too bad about it.

Don't let your "inner feels" take over. I have learned, and have made friends of those who were once "impossible", but when you know the whole story, it's like "This is the city with a thousand stories". When you see a fake, after a while, you can recognize it. However, tread lightly as you 'could' be wrong.

I think in some ways it's a product of our information age. We expect fast answers to our problems. Heck, in other forums I've seen people actually post questions about whether or not they should go to the emergency room and then wait for total strangers with no medical training to tell them what to do! It's as if, as a society, we're getting more technically savvy but turning into complete fools. Uh, except for some of the fine folks here, of course! We talk to a computer and forget that on the other side of the screen someone has just given up fifteen minutes of their life to provide a thoughtful answer.

This is so true. You reading this; are a person. When I re-read your response, it comes from a real person, with hopes, dreams, energies, families, soul, and love. The screen is only a window to another being.

Did you know that teachers aren't supposed to correct school tests with red pens anymore because it might hurt the feelings (red, being an adversarial color) of the student who got the question wrong? Whenever someone here can't handle the answers to their question, I just assume they're green-pen kids. They'll go away when they don't hear what they want to hear. And when the chorus doesn't sing: "Oh you're so brilliant! Wow, after seeing this for X-many years, no one else has EVER thought of that!! You're a GENIUS!!" And then they will get their butts kicked by a trustee somewhere. Sometimes people just need to learn the hard way.

Unfortunately this is so. Not to go political, but we no longer really teach. We 'baby-sit'. I won't say more.

You can't save everyone. But you do get points for trying. Know that at the end of the day you're part of something very meaningful to a lot of people and you've probably helped more than you'll ever know. Thanks for what you do.

That is kind, but please do the same. It is not hard. It is a gift only, not of money, but time and heart. I do love it. I don't have the time to be here as much as I wish.

'Hub, I think there are also people who are simply not forum-experienced. If someone has never posted to a group and they are scared and/or impatient for answers...well...multiple posting (and "pizziness") happens!

Yes, when one is in desperation, they want instant relief. As HHM said above, "like yesterday". You too must stay on after your experience and with what you said handle it well.

Amen, Free2Breathe. I felt like a little kid lost and alone in the woods until I came to this place. Since I'm an adult, calling "Mommy, Help Me!" doesn't work anymore, but do I wish it did! I will do my best to help others feeling that desperation as long as I can, or until I can't afford the cable anymore. LOL!!!!

But you have called 'Mommy' in a way. We are here. So, you be here when we are not.

I guess I owe an apology, as I feel my post/question was perhaps misunderstood. But, you know? This was so nice the response from some who have the hearts of what this forum is about. That is caring for the common man. Thank you all. 'Hub I'm asking that this thread be closed.