"Life's Final Documents"

[Minnymouth]

Life's Final Documents - Are you prepared?

Its something that most people don't want to talk about or even think about -but it is all down the road - waiting on us.....

Needless to say - even when we're sick, disabled, and eventually dead and gone from this world - a paper trail still follows along behind us......
Quite often right after a severe stroke or a death someone asks "where is their will?", "do you have Power of Attorney? "what is to become of their children?"...... "whose their insurance company"?..... "what are their wishes"?........ Do they want to be kept alive on a respirator? AND IT HAPPENS A LOT....... every time someone dies!!!

Many people are NEVER PREPARED for this part of life's paperwork that needs to be done by all, completed and tucked away for the future till it becomes necessary to bring it out....

Do your family members "know"...... what your last wishes are?, where your will is?, what is to be done with your children if your not here?, where are your copies of SS card, birth certificate, etc.... What you want done if you have a stroke and can no longer communicate with them?......

Many families DON'T KNOW AND WILL NEVER KNOW...... as long as those documents are not done and put in a safe place... Paperwork that your family will need and have to have after your gone.

Listed below are some the important papers that are needed for emergencies and at the end of Life's Journey....

1. Will
2. Living Will or Advanced Directive
3. Power of Attorney (POA) or Special Power of Attorney
4. Insurance papers (life and medical), claim forms, document of benefits
5. Birth Certificate/Death Certificates
6. Marriage Certificate
7. Social Security card and document to obtain information
8. List of all creditors, names, address & insurance regarding these
9. Income Tax forms - prev year and upcoming year (someone must file for you)
10 Titles to Auto (including all insurance papers also)
11. Mortgages and deeds (including all insurance papers also)
12. List of all checking accounts, savings accounts, safety deposit box, stocks/bonds

Its not necessary that everyone knows your business, BUT one person should at all times know where to find these documents.

I will add to this issue gradually as I have the time to help explain "the need" of each document and it's importance..........

[lrprn]

Life's Final Documents - Are you prepared?

Great list, Minny - thank you!

Here's one more important document to add - your advanced directive or living will. These documents clearly state your wishes about the types and degrees of medical interventions you want if you are unable to speak for yourself.

Advanced directives - http://familydoctor.org/003.xml
Living wills - http://estate.findlaw.com/estate-pla...ing-wills.html

As a critical care nurse, I've been in far too many end-of-life situations over the years when no one in the family knew what the patient wanted or there were large differences of opinion between family members about what to do. It's heartbreaking to watch families fall apart fighting among themselves when their loved one's passing should be a time to pull together for comfort and support. An advanced directive or living will is truly a gift to your family.

[SinkingFast]

That's where SIL left my Brother hanging, Lrprn. Advanced Directives.

SIL was in so much pain that they kept her very sedated most of the time. If Brother needed to talk to her about something, it would take a long time to get her pain free again. So Brother did not withhold the pain medication very often.

SIL had signed something with the Hospital that said she wanted all necessary proceedures and such to preserve life. BUT she'd told my Brother that she did not want to be dismembered in any way. No amputations. So he was in a Catch 22 for a while deciding what to do.

The doctors wanted to amputate SIL's leg 2 weeks before the actual surgery took place. Brother spent time exploring other alternatives based on SIL's wishes regarding amputation she'd voiced to him.

[tinroofrusted]

Good article.

The future husband and I are already working on having something in place, immediately after our wedding, so *just in case* we know what the other wants, and what is to be done.

We are also getting (SMALL!!!!!!) life insurance policies to cover the cost of a funeral also.

[krobin02]

I have absolutely none of these documents but have never worried about them before since I am still single and childless. However, I had begun thinking about this type of situation off and on in bits and pieces over the past 9 months or so. I increasingly want to distance myself from my mega controlling parents and, even more so now with the bk, keep them as in the dark as possible about my financial life. I am going to talk to my best friend about her being executor and my POA. It is not something that I want any family member in charge of.

[anonymuse]

Great post, Minny!

[Minnymouth]

Yes, I did leave off the "Living Will" - VERY IMPORTANT PAPER....... SO VERY IMPORTANT...... what made me forget that yesterday, I don't know..... must have been a "senior moment"????

Will continue on this today adding things to it and getting a discussion going on regarding this issue......

Minny

[Spiritwovles_2]

Life's Final Documents - Are you prepared?

......

GREAT post Minny! These are things we all need to think about and have in order.

[Minnymouth]

TO CONTINUE:

WILLS:

One of the most important documents you will ever draw up in your lifetime is your Last Will and Testament.....................

This document explains many different things:

1. what your final wishes are
2. how you want things done at your funeral
3. designates who will inherit from your estate and what
4. who will be in charge of your estate (executor) now that you have passed
5. what will happen to possessions -special things you want others to have
6. what happens to your minor children in the event of your death

NO WILL - serious problems....... for people who have children and assets.

First - everything is frozen..... accounts, etc.
Then everything has to go thru the Court. They have to appoint an executor who is to handle your affairs. (Family members can go ahead and arrange for funeral etc, but Court will decide all business affairs)
NOTE: Who ever signs the paperwork at the funeral home for the funeral WILL BE RESPONSIBLE for the debt...... so beware when you sign.
The executor will gather up all paperwork from family members they can find..... and everything will go thru probate court for final decisions.....

If you have minor children (no spouse) the Court will determine who will be the guardians of the minors..... Just because a grandparent or aunt and uncle wants to care for the minors doesn't mean the Court will grant custody. If its in the best interest of the children they will be placed in foster care.

The importance of a WILL cannot be stressed enough in todays world......
whether you have lots of assets and possessions, or none...... whether you be single, married, divorced, children, or no children......

And it plays a very important role in what is done with your children if you die when they are small.

It's hard to sit down and may your own WILL...... Married couples should have one together.....

Thinking about making your own WILL is like looking your own death in the face...... We all don't want to think about it, it's way in the future (we hope), and its one of the last things we really want to deal with in our lives..... even though we know we are not immortal.

BUT ITS SO IMPORTANT to all those that precede us...... that we have this paperwork in order for them.

Otherwise, they only guess at our wishes, and a lot of financial burdens and problems arise trying to settle the issues at hand.

SOMETHING FOR YOU ALL TO THINK ABOUT....................

[anonymuse]

In your living will, make sure you specify whether you intend to be an organ donor. That will help your family make that decision when the time comes if they know precisely what you want. (I'm a big advocate of organ donation--it has saved two of my friends lives.)

[Minnymouth]

TO CONTINUE

"LIVING WILL OR ADVANCED DIRECTIVE"

This document is of the UPMOST IMPORTANCE, that everyone should have..... it can mean the difference in life and death issues....... what our lives might be like in the future after something happens.....

A "living will" or "advanced directive" states how we feel about being kept alive or hooked up to life-support systems to keep us alive. Meaning if the equipment was turned off we would die.

This document is not about life support used for surgery purposes.

When we are unable to make this decision, and there is no paperwork in place showing our wishes, then normally a physician will ask the family what they want, and the physician makes the final decision....

REMEMBER, a physician's job is to keep you alive NO MATTER WHAT THE MEDICAL MEANS OR COST OR THE OUTCOME OF YOUR SITUATION IN THE END.....even if they know you are in the dying process. They are bound to do everything possible to keep you alive if they can.

An example: If you are hurt extremely bad, unconcious, and dying...... do you want to be brought back to life, kept alive by machinery, or live in a vegetable state of mind afterwards... taking your chances at the hands of the physicians, or letting someone make the decision for you based on your wishes whether you go thru this or not....

Who will make the decision to WITHOLD -
medical care (to prolong your life)
medicines (to lessen your pain)
food and water sources
life support procedures

Often someone dies slowly from an incurable disease..... death is in our future..... do we want someone to slow the process because THEY WANT TOO....or a physician tries too..... KNOWING we are going to die anyways.
Do we want it prolonged - possibly in pain, or laying for months unconscious because machines are keeping us alive.

If your dying is in question, what do you want done???? Make this decision yourself, or leave the heart-wrenching decision to your loved one, or in the hands of a physician....????

Many family members cannot make these decisions, nor do they want too.... (some cannot live with the decision they do make).....

THIS SHOULD BE YOUR DECISION....... not a doctors!

This is a very important piece of document that all adults need...

Also, if you are or wish to be an organ donor.... this has to be KNOWN in the "living will"/advanced directive...... so that the physician can make arrangements to have the organs removed..... Many organs cannot be transplanted if the body has completed the dying cylce and not on a respirator.... or if too much time has passed after death.

Another of the hard to make decisions we need to make in our lives....
Another look at our immortality.......

Something to think about......

[Minnymouth]

TO CONTINUE

POWER OF ATTORNEY (POA) AND SPECIAL POWER OF ATTORNEY

A DUAL POWER OF ATTORNEY.................... gives someone all the same privileges that you have regarding all your affairs...... they can do it all, sign deeds, papers, cash checks, etc. (so be very careful you give this power too - in the wrong hands they can empty your checking account, savings, etc).

With this type of document in place the party you designate can do anything that you do..................regarding your life. (except discuss your affairs with Social Security - will discuss this later)...

SPECIAL POWER OF ATTORNEY.............. designates only "certain powers and certain circumstances" that someone can act in your behalf regarding all issues in your life...... You state what they are allowed to do and not allowed to do.....

Special Power of Attorney papers specify that only at "certain times" or under "certain circumstances" that the person designated can handle yours affairs. Example: You can state that this person has this power ONLY when you are unable to handle your own affairs, (unconcious, total disabled, stroke victim..... etc). You state when and what they can handle..... nothing else.
You can state that they can access your checking account to pay bills only -nothing else - the choices are yours....

With one of these documents in place your affairs can be handled by someone whom you have designated them to do so...

If you are well, sick, unconscious or just unable to handle your affairs, one of these documents allow someone to handle your affairs for you.

Without one of these types of documents in place - NO ONE can handle any of your business, medical, etc affairs without a Court Order appointing them to be you Power of Attorney or Guardian....

Either one of these documents can be revoked at any time..... and the privilege taken away...... You can also grant a "temporary POA" to someone if needed giving only certain dates that it would apply.

These type of documents are in place to help you should you not be able to help yourself or in a position where you need the help of others.

Do not grant these privileges to someone that you do not trust completely.... AS THEY CAN DO ANYTHING YOU CAN DO with your property, accounts, etc....

Something else to think about......

[Minnymouth]

Many of you may think that this is an odd place to put such a posting as this regarding "lifes final documents".......

But ya know, a lot of people NEVER let this kind of thing cross their minds....

If your going to get a "fresh start" in life......... do it all the right way and the proper way....... protect yourself and your family for the future!!!

I don't mean for this thread to be depressing to anyone, filing bankruptcy is depressing enough as it is..... it really takes its toll on our lives......

I just wanted everyone to be AWARE of some of the other THINGS in our lives that we need to HAVE OUR DUCKS IN A ROW.......

Being older than most of you I have encountered all of the above problems...... one with a parent with no paperwork (NOTHING) and one parent where I got them to fix all their paperwork for me and me fix paperwork for them.....

The first parent death was a nightmare...... no paperwork, spouses hands tied, couldn't do anything without Court Order.....

Other parent had paperwork in order everything went smoothly, no problems..... no added stress....

I thought maybe by starting this thread, help explaining some of the issues and how important they really are, that I can help save some of you some serious problems in the future.....

That is my intent...... not to add to your stress levels.....

Just a reminder that there are many other documents you need to get in order for your future..... young or old....

[Minnymouth]

TO CONTINUE

LIFE INSURANCE/MEDICAL INSURANCE

Everyone in our famlies need life insurance and medical insurance..... as most of us who have claimed bankrutpcy have REALLY DISCOVERED. Some of us lack of it is what helped get us here!!!!

Everyone in your family needs life insurance..... if only just enough to bury us. Whole life is available and term life.... Term life is the cheapest but builds no equity to draw on if one wanted too later.

Many a parent has buried a child wih no insurance on them..... devastating and expensive......

Medical insurance, no matter how expensive is really a necessity in our society.... especially for the elderly, and children... Medical bills can send our finances into a termoil, as many of us know. Unexpected emergencies send our lives into a frenzie sometimes.......

Most companies offer some form of insurance and medical coverage.... some pay for it all if your a single employee....

Try your best to find employment that covers your family with both... or at least where you can buy it on a "company plan" where its a lot cheaper....

Those of you that are self-employed really run into a problem in this area.
Be wise, shop around.

TO BE CONTINUED.

[Minnymouth]

TO CONTINUE

BIRTH CERTIFICATES, DEATH CERTIFICATES, MARRIAGE LISCENSE


All of the above documents play an important role from birth to death.....

Birth certificates are used from the day we are born till after we pass on. It proves who we are!!! They are needed to go to school, get a drivers liscence, passport, marriage liscence and obtain a death certificate.

Marriage liscense - are also used from many things. Proof of spouse status, etc. Also if spouse applies for death certificate.

Death Certificates - you have to produce birth certificate and marriage liscence (if married) of spouse that has passed on. Death certificates (original certified copies) have to be submitted to claim any insurance claim death benefits, survivor ships, remove names from checking accounts, etc.

All of these documents should be kept in a safe place..... away from your home..... a safety deposit box, and an extra photo copy for emergency use if something happened to your originals. Otherwise you have to reapply all over again.

Know where all these documents are put, you will need them sooner than you think..... make sure you have all you need, on hand when the time comes.

TO BE CONTINUED.