Keeping a computer in Ch. 7? Friend of mine's vehicle repo'd by unsecured creditor!

[mgmadara]

Flamingo is 100% accurate. Not to be sexist, but who the hell wears the pants in your family? When Mrs. and I were first married, she was 34 and head of household in her family of one Mother. One of the first things we discussed is, "Honey Cat, we both have a 50/50 % vote on everything except, my vote is 51% when things come down to an important matter. What I was saying is I have and have always been fair and loving to my Mrs. but if we have a disagreement of importance MY word is will. It is Biblical as well as socially accepted (so far) that the man is head of the family.

If my husband had come to me before marriage with that load of crap he wouldn't be my husband. I have plenty more to say about it, but none of it is nice so I'll spare everybody.


Debtmonster, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. You might think that your debt problems are permanent, but they are not. You don't need your wife to cooperate. If she won't listen to you file on your own and leave her with the debt. She will get the picture eventually.

[fltoo]

If you had any respect and love for your Maker or any other human being for that matter, you would not be telling him he has failed the WHOLE forum.
Maybe I was absent for the vote. Did someone on the forum give you 51% voting power?

Listen Debtmonster, if your last statement is indeed real, please get some help immediately. Ignore the nonsense about not being a man. Maybe google a forum for feelings of suicide just so you can talk if you won't call a doctor. Ignore the debt problem until you understand that your money and marriage problems (if any) do not determine your self worth. Get better and then deal with the BK.

I am pretty sure that no one here thinks you have failed anyone here. They are just frustrated that you aren't moving forward with the good advice.

[debtmonster]

I think instead of going through all of this hassle, I am simply better off putting a .357 in my mouth and pulling the trigger. It's an easy way out.

[Pizza]

DEBTMONSTER . . . . . Dude!! What is the deal here? I sat & read every page of this thread, and the problem is crystal clear - Seriously, Stop letting your wife ruin your life! From the way you describe her, she sounds like this Latin American girl that childishly sought out a sugar daddy and lost every sense of survivalism! Why on God's green earth does anyone *NEED* a BMW? No lawyer will feel sorry for the two of you when you're driving a luxury car and skipping out on the credit card debts.

With all the great advice that has been given, you keep repeating this sob story about the mean old wife and her screaming to keep that BMW. At some point you are going to HAVE to stand up for yourself. You will never be free of these problems letting someone spend at will. Give HER the problems to deal with, like everyone said, make HER the bills, cut up the cards, remove her from everything you can remove her from. From what I gather, this will almost assuredly result in divorce, but hey if it's for the best (and it sounds like it is) why not go for the fresh start altogether?

You're biggest fear I think is that you'll be out on the streets and broke without her. The reality is that you stand a better chance on your own two feet. Without those bills that are killing you (such as the car payments, in which you have expressed the willingness to give up the cars), you should certainly be able to save up for a place to rent. Contract with a hotel room for a while if you have to, save your money and start looking for a private landlord who will accept a large deposit (usually first & last month's rent)... I think someone will gladly take the money over an empty rent home.

I mean this in the nicest way possible. You have to make up your mind that you are going to solve this problem... get it out of the way and move on. Get the suicidal tendencies out of your system - see a doctor if you must.

And don't bash the Ch. 13 ... debt reduction is still better than keeping all debts ... you won't end up paying more than you can afford.

Good luck, and please don't get taken. It's not worth it.

[epiphany]

Flamingo is 100% accurate. Not to be sexist, but who the hell wears the pants in your family? When Mrs. and I were first married, she was 34 and head of household in her family of one Mother. One of the first things we discussed is, "Honey Cat, we both have a 50/50 % vote on everything except, my vote is 51% when things come down to an important matter. What I was saying is I have and have always been fair and loving to my Mrs. but if we have a disagreement of importance MY word is will. It is Biblical as well as socially accepted (so far) that the man is head of the family. Now "DebtMonster" it is time to become a "man" and listen to what Flamingo and several hundred of us have been telling you. OR.......... don't post your questions if you will not act on any answer. You waste your time and ours. Just keep helping others as you have successfully done, except for yourself. 'Hub

Hub, you don't want to sound sexist but you do. If MAN were truly the head of the family then the MRS. wouldn't have to be here with you, going through this with you. You would have toughed it out by yourself and taken care of your family.

I don't wish to get into an argument, although I have many on this subject, but I have noticed that on this comment, unlike others, the MRS. has not replied to support what you just said.

I would be curious to know what she has to say about what you just said. And, in case you don't realize it, you basically just said that men are smarter than and superior to women, whether you realize it or not.

ep

[AngelinaCatHub]

What good is all of this advice if I don't qualify? I already spoke with the attorneys and they said I can't do it. My problems are not going to go away. Remember when I was in the hospital in June and got the $31,000 hospital bill? Well, another one came today for $4,000 from the cardiology dept. Plus there's two others for another $1,000.

I am so pissed off that they made this stupid law like you have no idea. So now if we make $55-60k/yr., we make more than the $50,300/yr. that you're allowed and can't qualify. This absolutely sucks like there's no tomorrow.

I may have to wait a very long time until we get just the right combination of checks where our income is just under the amount allowed.

The problems I had in the spring have not gone away. They have only got worse with almost $40,000 more in debt added to the pile. This is so depressing. There's no way I am going to do some stupid chapter 13 for this crap.

I really do regret having to say this: You have been lurking around a long, long, time. What you just said in your last post, and then you say this is why……? I just do not understand.

I really don’t think you have the will to face Mrs. In my younger day, they would say you are pu$$ywhipped. I am sorry for you. I predict you will go under in any case by your own fear, or whatever. Probably by that time, it will be solo. I wish you well.

As for now, I shall not post on any future questions you may have that I could help you with.

This whole forum has failed to help you. Let me rephrase that, you have failed this whole forum.

In all due respect and love in our Maker, I am, ‘Hub

[BnkrptcyLwyr]

I am so pissed off that they made this stupid law like you have no idea. So now if we make $55-60k/yr., we make more than the $50,300/yr. that you're allowed and can't qualify. This absolutely sucks like there's no tomorrow.

What attorney are you talking to?

Just because you are "over the median" doesn't mean you won't ultimately pass the means test. It just means that you must go through the extra work to determine if you beat the presumption of abuse after you then take out the deductions.

You have to complete the whole form, and then consider the "special circumstances" which may be applicable.

You may beat the presumption of abuse even if you are over the median ... it happens all the time.

[debtmonster]

What good is all of this advice if I don't qualify? I already spoke with the attorneys and they said I can't do it. My problems are not going to go away. Remember when I was in the hospital in June and got the $31,000 hospital bill? Well, another one came today for $4,000 from the cardiology dept. Plus there's two others for another $1,000.

I am so pissed off that they made this stupid law like you have no idea. So now if we make $55-60k/yr., we make more than the $50,300/yr. that you're allowed and can't qualify. This absolutely sucks like there's no tomorrow.

I may have to wait a very long time until we get just the right combination of checks where our income is just under the amount allowed.

The problems I had in the spring have not gone away. They have only got worse with almost $40,000 more in debt added to the pile. This is so depressing. There's no way I am going to do some stupid chapter 13 for this crap.

[fltoo]

If you really want a SUV you can find a cheaper one that cost less to upkeep. I wouldn't get a Hyundai anything though.
I also can see how your wife likes the BMW SUV, they are nice and have a great ride.

I would also see how you can break the cycle of buying vehicles you can't afford to keep.

Good luck!

Heyyy, just noticed your signature. Way to go!

[fltoo]

Flamingo is 100% accurate. Not to be sexist, but who the hell wears the pants in your family? When Mrs. and I were first married, she was 34 and head of household in her family of one Mother. One of the first things we discussed is, "Honey Cat, we both have a 50/50 % vote on everything except, my vote is 51% when things come down to an important matter. What I was saying is I have and have always been fair and loving to my Mrs. but if we have a disagreement of importance MY word is will. It is Biblical as well as socially accepted (so far) that the man is head of the family. Now "DebtMonster" it is time to become a "man" and listen to what Flamingo and several hundred of us have been telling you. OR.......... don't post your questions if you will not act on any answer. You waste your time and ours. Just keep helping others as you have successfully done, except for yourself. 'Hub

Biblical? The bible was written by men.

Socially acceptable? There are almost as many women heading up households as men, in reality, probably more.

[Cali]

If you really want a SUV you can find a cheaper one that cost less to upkeep. I wouldn't get a Hyundai anything though.
I also can see how your wife likes the BMW SUV, they are nice and have a great ride.

I would also see how you can break the cycle of buying vehicles you can't afford to keep.

Good luck!

[AngelinaCatHub]

Flamingo is 100% accurate. Not to be sexist, but who the hell wears the pants in your family? When Mrs. and I were first married, she was 34 and head of household in her family of one Mother. One of the first things we discussed is, "Honey Cat, we both have a 50/50 % vote on everything except, my vote is 51% when things come down to an important matter. What I was saying is I have and have always been fair and loving to my Mrs. but if we have a disagreement of importance MY word is will. It is Biblical as well as socially accepted (so far) that the man is head of the family. Now "DebtMonster" it is time to become a "man" and listen to what Flamingo and several hundred of us have been telling you. OR.......... don't post your questions if you will not act on any answer. You waste your time and ours. Just keep helping others as you have successfully done, except for yourself. 'Hub

[Flamingo]

Debtmonster - this past spring the entire matter was hashed out previously on here and then you come back several months later with the same issues and have been given the same advice over and over again. None of us can physically come to your area and hold your hand and guide you through the process. The ball is in your court and you have to pick it up and run with it to get anything done. Otherwise you will simply continue to complain on here and ask the same questions over and over again. You have more than financial difficulties to deal with and you are having a very hard time handling it all. You just don't seem to know where or how to begin although excellent advice has been given to you as to exactly what to do. I believe from reading your postings past and present you are suffering from depression from all that is going on in your life and you don't know what to do or how to control it as it is way beyond. It is either that or you love the attention you receive on here (just look at the number of postings in this thread). May I recommend a first step for you to get things rolling....call your family doctor and get seen - advice him/her (it's all confidential) that you are having severe financial and emotional/marital issues and are having a hard time as to figuring out where to start or what to do. Your family doctor can also provide you with some counseling references that might be able to help you sort things out and deal with the entire situation. You also need a good consultatoin with a BK lawyer. Once you get all that knocked out of the way and have a handle on what needs to be done, you can work on getting your life back in order. You and your wife have to get out of the denial stage. But the first step is yours and I certainly wish you all the luck in the world.

[AngelinaCatHub]

DebtMonster is in a precarious position. He is attempting to hold his marriage together and I believe his DW really believes that all can become fixed in time. Well, it won’t be and time is on his side right now. Be the first in line as with our economy the line is going to get a lot longer. It may be time to take a stand. There is a 50/50 chance your marriage will not survive if you take the reins up and move without her cooperation. However it will be a 90/10 possibility against the marriage when you cannot pay the bills and Judgments and suits hit you both.

I don’t want to beat you up more than this thread has, but everyone here is telling you what you already know but are afraid to do. You have given others excellent advice including myself. Now it is time to do what you HAVE to do and let the chips fall where they may (if you survive). Much care and hope in your direction. ‘Hub

[Minnymouth]

You can file Chapter 7 by YOURSELF........... and then..... anything owned jointly by you and your spouse, the creditors will come after her for full payment.... BELIEVE ME, SHE WILL SEE THE LIGHT THEN!!!!
You will be free of debt, she won't........

Talk to a bk attorney, let your DW know what your going to do and that THEY WILL BE COMING AFTER HER NEXT. Otherwise the only option open to her is to file WITH YOU and get a clean slate all the way around for both of you.

After you file if she cannot make all the payments on house, car, etc, they will be around to foreclose and repo eveything.

Once you file, quit paying for anything and save your money. Be prepared to move in the future (4-6 months - depending on your state laws). You may be able to live in the house for 6 months or more (payment free) because they will have to go thru foreclosure process on your wife.

Thus will give you time to save funds to move, and purchase another auto.

It will be TOUGH, and it may be a BATTLE WITH DW, but believe me what you do NOW will determine what your future with her will be like.

You need to do something now and soon before you start having lawsuits that will cost extra in bankruptcy and having wages garnished.

Keep us posted on what YOUR "game plan" is.......

Time to let the DW - be on her own - and SEE THE LIGHT!!!