New to this and needing to vent and some advice

[jensu82]

I apologize in advance because this will be a long post!

My husband and I have been married for 2 years. I was married previously and brought with me about $15K in misc. debt (no student loans or back taxes). My husband was not married before but he did bring about $8K of debt with him (also no student loans or back taxes).

Since we've been married, we hit a lot of hardships. He lost his job and was drawing unemployment. I was let go from my job after my supervisor found out I was pregnant. We fell behind and racked up an additional $25K in debt (mainly medical due to my insurance dropping me and laboring and delivery rates).

Our current situation is now this: My husband is working FT on a commission based job and is tracking to make about $40K this year. I am not working because I would mainly be working to pay child care and we just found out I am pregnant again. (Total shock, birth control baby).

We have not made a CC payment for almost 6 months and yesterday my husband received a summons to appear in court to have his check garnished for medical bills.

We are hardly getting by and by hardly, I mean... we are living disconnect notice to disconnect notice.

We know that we need to file bankrupcy but we also don't have the money to afford an attorney and according to legal aid, we make too much to receive any assistance. (This I don't understand because we do now have some type of medical assistance from the state.)

I know that a person can file themselves and go through the proceedings and I THINK I could handle that but I would much prefer an attorney.

This whole situation makes me sick and I feel so helpless!!

[btbeme]

First, welcome to the forums. Let us help you lower the anxiety in your life.

Let's start with your employment and living. Would you have enough to cover basic necessities after all other debts were discharged? You will first need to look at that and make any necessary adjustments to your living expenses so you can live on the income you have after BK.

Second, it sounds like your BK would be pretty straightforward, though it could get more complex if there is indeed a judgement on you. What exactly did the paperwork say? There cannot be a garnishment without a judgement, and a judgement would have come via at least a few notices from the courts (a notice of filing, a court date, and a default judgement being entered). Is this indeed a notice of garnishment? Check it closely.

Let us know ASAP and we can help.

[jensu82]

The paperwork was rubber banded to our door... It's a statement of claim to appear for a medical debt. He hasn't been garnished yet but we've already been through one of these and he was garnished. The court date is set for August 1st.

We could cover basic necessities after these debts were discharged. I have been doing everything in my power to skim where I can on things like groceries, gasoline, trips to the store. I even make my own household cleaners now.

[keepsmiling]

Stop paying all those bills you hope to discharge in a BK. Then you will (hopefully) have enough for the lawyer.
Meanwhile, start making some appointments.
And... congrats on the new little one. I hope you can relax enough to enjoy the prospect.

[hmsmith]

Congrats on your pregnancy and I know this must be a tough time for you.

Since you said you have stopped paying CC's 6 months ago, and are barely making it month to month right now, then what most of us would suggest (use your payments to CC to pay an attorney) it sounds like that isn't an affordable option for you at this time. I would suggest seeking out an attorney since the initial consultation should be FREE, and then once you find one that you want to go with, you can possibly make monthly payments to them. Once you pay their retainer fee (for us that was around $300) you can direct any phonecalls you get to your attorney. Plus they can go over your personal financial situation and explain the best option for you and maybe put mind at ease a little.

[ValleYum]

Do you have medical insurance for the new baby-to-be' s delivery? It would really suck to discharge debts only to run up new medical bills in a matter of months.

[shotgun7]

You need to respond to that summons ASAP, do not let them just get a default judgement!! If you respond, and appear at the very worst you should be able to work out some sort of payment plan other than to have the check garnished. If nothing else, you could fight it and it will buy you a little time.

[btbeme]

Agreed. You can buy time by filing a response to the lawsuit. Look up your state rules regarding the timeline, then research a basic guideline for filing an answer. Do so at the last possible moment. That will buy you some time. There are plenty of ways to delay a judgement for a while.

Two things - you do need to consult with a few attorneys ASAP using their free initial consult. Most attorneys have one. Second - and very important - set up your post-BK budget plan now. make sure you can afford to live within your means before you file. What would indeed be terrible is to drop your debts in a BK only to be in a position where you still cannot afford to do what you do.

Please schedule a couple appointments ASAP and let us know how they go. We are here for you.

[joshuagraham]

Not only would I consult with a bankruptcy attorney, but I would look at suing the employer that terminated you for being pregnant! Of course, make sure that you get your debts discharged first before suing, so that the bankruptcy estate cannot confiscate your lawsuit award.

[LadyInTheRed]

Of course, make sure that you get your debts discharged first before suing, so that the bankruptcy estate cannot confiscate your lawsuit award.

If there is a claim for wrongful termination, the claim exists now and should be reported as an asset on the BK petition, even if no lawsuit has yet been filed.

[bcohen]

Not only would I consult with a bankruptcy attorney, but I would look at suing the employer that terminated you for being pregnant! Of course, make sure that you get your debts discharged first before suing, so that the bankruptcy estate cannot confiscate your lawsuit award.

Surely, the employer was not dumb enough to actually SAY the reason you were laid off is because you're pregnant. I remember when I worked for a large electronics/computer store, and when applicants came in who were noticeably pregnant, or looked too old, we went through the motions, and gave them an interview, but then found some other excuse to not hire them. We never gave the (legally protected) real reason as the reason--we just found someone more qualified, or whatever.

[jensu82]

Thanks for all the comments and suggestions. I really appreciate it.

We have the bare minimum insurance through my husbands works and I also have qualified for pregnancy medicaid. I'm not proud of it but I know we cannot afford another 17K baby bill.

I was never outright told that I was fired because I was pregnant but I received an excellent evaluation, informed them of my pregnancy at the same meeting, and the following day I was written up for something that I most certainly did not agree with.

I had a doctor's note stating I should sit down when necessary (I had pre-E) and around the 6th month, my swelling was so bad I was mainly sitting at work. The supervisor that wrote me up actually asked me if I wanted to have another manager push me around on the salesfloor. I did turn him in for this because it was embarrassing and hurtful. It was said in front of 3 of my co-workers. Month 7, I took early maternity leave and upon turning in my FMLA papers, I was told that when I returned I would need to step down and look for another store to work at because my work was not up to standard. When it was time for me to go back, I was told I had already been terminated from the system because I didn't come back when my release paper stated I was suppose to. That was incorrect because I actually came in the day before I was suppose to return because I needed to know my schedule for the following day... (This is also the time I learned that my insurance was dropped and that NONE of my hospital or doctor's bills were covered. My insurance was cut when I took leave and I wasn't informed.) This all occurred in 2010.

We do have a little bit of money saved up in a shoe box but we only use it if absolutely necessary. It isn't a lot but would probably pay the retainer fee. I wasn't aware we could make payments? I love this board.

Question though, should I stop paying on installment loans? We have 2 and that would help us keep about $450 more a month. They're not attached to anything like cars or houses.

[shotgun7]

Stop paying anything that you can afford to lose... If they are unsecured loans that are not tied to anything I would most certinaly stop paying them and start saving. We are in that stage now, It is not an easy thing to do... for the last several years I have always done whatever I had to do, even if it meant going without personally to pay the bills.... Its hard, atleast for me to just stop. However, we have realized what is coming and have accepted it.

[jensu82]

I feel like we've been in survival mode for the last 2 years. I didn't pay a loan that was due yesterday. I felt awful and even cried about it.

I know we're doing the right thing but I just feel so worthless right now.

[hmsmith]

I really think you should call some bankruptcy attorneys as soon as possible. It should be free for the initial consult. Find one that you are comfortable with and he/she will probably be able to help you not feel so overwhelmed. I know this is hard, trust me, we all do. THis was not an easy thing for me, but if I wanted to make a better future for my family and my kids, we NEEDED to do something. It is hard to accept at first for some of us, and sometimes still is for me even though we are approaching our discharge. You are not alone...i know that it might feel like you are, but trust me, you are not. Spend some time reading some posts on here, maybe it will help you. Keep your chin up! It WILL get better!