I'm outta here!

[fltoo]

I think your experiences are defenitely an asset to this forum, it shows us what is indeed possible in a BK. Others have the right to thier opinion as well, just dont let it bother you.

I had a thought as well, if people such as yourself (with adversarial occurences in thier bk) are run off by people saying such things are not possible, then those people become "right" because we lose all examples that there is a possibility for something other than the norm. That is not to say that such events will no longer exist, but if they are unbenownst to us then we will believe they do not exist.

Anyways, hope you change your mind, no shame in that my friend.

Oh, this post is directed towards HELP! and the original post, as opposed to hijacking the thread to talk about something that was closed.....come on its funny

Your last sentence.......you are right. I am sorry for my part. I should not have brought that up again.

[Minnymouth]

People can really "lash out" when they are stressed out, and bankruptcy can really put the stress factor out there.

They want our opinion and suggestions, but often its "not what they really want to hear"......

The mental state of someone fighting bankruptcy is right on the edge of breaking someone down.....mentally, physically, and emotionally. It disrupts their whole life for a while until its all over.

Often folks have to take "meds" during the BK process to deal with the anxiety, panic attacks, nerves that filing BK and having your world upside town creates. Many folks cannot accept a Trustee being "in charge" of their lives for a time being. I'm sure filing BK has broken up a marriage or two along the way.

When they are in this "state of mind" anything you say to them (suggestions, your experiences, etc) they might take as judgemental and go into "defense mode".....

A note to all new members........ We are NOT THE ENEMY..... this forum is here to help you, guide you, and tell you what you might be up against when you file bankruptcy. Most of us have already "been there, done it"....

You don't have to take our suggestions, or agree with us. That's why you hire an attorney.

Be patient with new members till they start learning "the process" and all the emotions that they are going to go thru. We olders ones have "been there"....

During the process, you cannot carry your "heart around on your sleeve" by any means. Remember, you won't die from bankruptcy, it just a "business decision" and its like a rollercoaster ride for a few months.... then its over and the sun is shining and all is well again in your lives (even better)....

I am going to lock this thread as I feel enough has been said.....

[JRScott]

Help you've always been very helpful I think. Your experiences help newer folks. Please stick around

[AngelinaCatHub]

Cali, I think your response was just taken out of context the way it was worded.* She read it as one sentence instead of realizing the word "maybe" was not part of the question.* You come across as a very sensible person. Maybe we can just give her the benefit of the doubt on that one.

[justplaintired]

I am glad that HELP posted. I feel badly that her logical posts were lumped in with those horrible posts telling that poor woman that she needed to see a therapist because she was beyong the scope of help that "we" could give her here and accusing her of all kinds of terrible things.

I was offended because I am definitely not part of that "we" garbage.

I think that woman lashed out at all just because she was so besides herself reading that awful stuff. Don't take it personally.

Might sound silly, but I have had that poor woman on my mind. I do hope she is okay.

Fltoo, I couldn't have said it better myself. I too have thought of that women today and hope she is alright.

We are not here to judge each other only to help each other if we can. I believe that is the reason for this forum. If judging people becomes common place this is definitely not the place for me. I too made mistakes, many, many mistakes. That's why I'm here. Some of us made bigger mistakes then others, and when they come here for advice, that's what they should get, not judgement. No one should walk away from a thread feeling worse then they did before they posted the thread. And this poor women was judged, juried and hung.

Help! I don't think for one minute you personally meant any harm, your post were simply educational. I think you got drug in on something that you didn't deserve. As I do a few others. Some simply posted things that had no place in a thread involving BK.

Just for the record, Cali, you did nothing wrong, you are one I am referring to as being drug in on something you didn't deserve.

[fltoo]

Cali, I think your response was just taken out of context the way it was worded. She read it as one sentence instead of realizing the word "maybe" was not part of the question. You come across as a very sensible person. Maybe we can just give her the benefit of the doubt on that one.

[Priceless ProSe]

I think your experiences are defenitely an asset to this forum, it shows us what is indeed possible in a BK. Others have the right to thier opinion as well, just dont let it bother you.

I had a thought as well, if people such as yourself (with adversarial occurences in thier bk) are run off by people saying such things are not possible, then those people become "right" because we lose all examples that there is a possibility for something other than the norm. That is not to say that such events will no longer exist, but if they are unbenownst to us then we will believe they do not exist.

Anyways, hope you change your mind, no shame in that my friend.

Oh, this post is directed towards HELP! and the original post, as opposed to hijacking the thread to talk about something that was closed.....come on its funny

[Cali]

And the reason she lashed out me was what? I didn't say she needed help and I didn't call her a name. I was asking legitimate questions. She went off on me for them.

I think that woman lashed out at all just because she was so besides herself reading that awful stuff. Don't take it personally.

Might sound silly, but I have had that poor woman on my mind. I do hope she is okay.

[fltoo]

I am glad that HELP posted. I feel badly that her logical posts were lumped in with those horrible posts telling that poor woman that she needed to see a therapist because she was beyong the scope of help that "we" could give her here and accusing her of all kinds of terrible things.

I was offended because I am definitely not part of that "we" garbage.

I think that woman lashed out at all just because she was so besides herself reading that awful stuff. Don't take it personally.

Might sound silly, but I have had that poor woman on my mind. I do hope she is okay.

[Cali]

No longer applies.

[BKdinOhio]

Help! Whatever you do don't leave this wonderful forum.

In the short time that I've been on here there are a lot of good people with a lot of varying experiences.

I personally am starting down that path. We are not here to "play the system" we are here because there's no possible way to we can re-pay the ones we thought we would be able to repay without a very large windfall (Good luck on that one!)

There are a lot of lessons to be learned in this forum.

I read the thread that became a disaster. I believe that there was miscommunication, and misunderstanding on both sides.

We all rely on the information that is presented here to help each other. In the time I've been on the net I've gleaned a few things about internet message boards that have become true at least to my POV (well the ones that are good like this one!)

This might make a good READ ME FIRST BEFORE YOU POST

Internet Message Board Survival Tips

1. Don't take comments personal. Period.

2. If your asking for help give all the information. Don't beat around the bush, organize it! Be honest, and we'll be honest! Some people will be blunt, some won't.

3. If you are offended by post Review #1, and take 2 steps back and count to ten.

4. Don't react, take a moment re read the information. Quote information your unsure about.

5. Semantics--People can take the things anyway they want, it's all in how they read it. Please don't take what is said as a personal attack, if possible review what you typed and consider restating it to clarify your position. Whatever you don't don't let your emotions to cloud your judgment!

6. If this post offended you..see #1

[AngelinaCatHub]

I too can’t see a reason ‘Help’. I suspect a possible personal post? Whatever set you off, you have been an inspiration to Ms. Cat and I. I am going through a bit of what you went through. Maybe even worse, but seeing you hang in there has kept Ms. and I going.

We need your wisdom and advice for you have been there. Those who fish for acceptance of bad actions are far and few between. They usually give themselves away anyway.

Not having you here will make a big hole or empty place on this site. ‘Hub and Mrs. Cat

[MomIcantFindmy]

Help,
Please stay!!! I need another person like you!! I truly understand your feelings. I also have felt compelled to leave on a few occasions. I don't post as much as I used to. When I first started posing here I felt a strong sense of camaraderie and a kind of we are all in this together feeling. I think threads are becoming way more divisive than need be. I am seeing posts that are meant to divide and stir up strong feelings (usually in the General Talk). Those posts serve no purpose except to anger people on each side of an issue and it is unfortunate that people find this board a place to vent those issues. I think some of the posters anger is carrying into the actual BK posts. I know the Mods have real lives beyond this board but I hope that some of these attacks can be thwarted.

Help, if you find someone attacking you send a message to a Mod. Again, please stay and send me a private message if you like. I will surely listen to a fellow poster, I promise!!!

I have found some of these rules listed on the forum. I believe they apply in many cases.

Things you agree not to do:
• All BF users agree not to call people names or write a post simply to make a personal attack, or get a negative reaction; this behavior is not allowed on our forum. The use of derogatory language aimed at anyone will be severely dealt with. There is no need to agree with each other, or to even like each other. However, by signing onto BF you agree to treat each member and guest with the respect they deserve. No threats or personal attacks will be allowed.

• All BF users agree not to spam the forums. Spam includes but is not limited to posting erroneous, non-relevant-useless, off-topic, or meaningless posts.......

[EmmaPeel007]

Step away from the keyboard and grab a margarita in the sunshine. Does wonders, trust

[justplaintired]

I think I know what happened and I do hope you won't leave. I have never found any post you made to be anything but helpful. I think what happened was people got caught up in the moment and that is just too bad. I think we all need to remember why we are here to help each other. To give advice if we have any and to take advice if we need it.

I do hope you'll stay, please don't let this drive you away. This forum is so necessary for ones like me who are just starting or working our way threw the process and we need members who have been threw it to answer questions. Stay please.