Regrets?

[Drazil65]

I do not think most regret bankruptcy at all.....I can tell you that the quality of our life has changed two times over for the good since the bankruptcy and I think for many this is the case. Its all good and life is simple...

[sbatman]

Not a single regret, best thing we could have ever done after the value of high maintenance house tanked $50K below what we owed on it. After I lost my job.

Walking away scot-free was an incredibly wonderful experience.

Maybe it's just rationalization, but I did nothing worse than the big companies who were too big to fail. Couldn't make the payments on the submarine house after job loss and losing all the credit card debt was gravy.

After discharge I emptied my useless retirement account and bought a cheap, yet comfortable house free and clear. Both cars (an older Subaru and 2010 Honda) are also paid off.

Kinda smug, but I've had some very hard times in my life, through no fault of my own, so I figure Karma finally turned my way.

[switch625]

First time posting here. My wife and I filed in late 2013, but still awaiting confirmation which should happen next month. Like others, I don't regret filing and I'm very glad we did it (I've been considering it since 2010 and doing lots of reading and research on BK since), but I do regret not filing sooner (like in 2010) and doing some band-aid (and senseless) things like apply for credit cards, take out 401K hardship withdrawals, hardship payment plans with the CC companies and the like. I discovered that the slippery slope to financial catastrophe was getting more and more slippery with each passing month, until I stopped it with the filing of the Ch 13 petition. I sleep easier now and I'm a great deal happier than I was this time last year,

[df04527]

Can't agree more!

[papie]

Generally speaking, do you think that many people really do regret filing? I just don't get why they are so vigorously against BK.

Maybe those are the people who don't know much about BK and didn't do their research prior to filing. I'll admit there were a lot of things I didn't know about before I filed, but after researching it I really did feel it was a better option.

I don't think there's a great deal of people who regret filing bankruptcy. I think a lot of people regret the choices and/or situations that led them to file bankruptcy.

There's a lot of stigma around bankruptcy and most people who have something negative to say about filing have never experienced it. I've had financial professionals tell me that I would be unable to finance a car or buy a house for years upon years. An overwhelming number of people in this country think that bankruptcy is a financial death sentence. I feel like the big banks and corporations have done a really good job of convincing Americans that the should bow down, buckle down, be a slave to debt, and preserve their credit score or else they'll be homeless, carless, and jobless. And that's just not true.

[ksgirl38]

Thanks everyone. Here's something I do not get. I've been lurking on the Dave Ramsey forum (just lurking, I do not post there) and everyone there is adamant that filing BK is the worst thing ever and that you'll regret it. They post anecdotal things like "everyone I know who has filed, regrets it." But I read here that most do not regret it.

Generally speaking, do you think that many people really do regret filing? I just don't get why they are so vigorously against BK.

Maybe those are the people who don't know much about BK and didn't do their research prior to filing. I'll admit there were a lot of things I didn't know about before I filed, but after researching it I really did feel it was a better option.

[ksgirl38]

BK has a stigma. My parents would be horrified to learn I filed bankruptcy. I think it's a generational thing.

Still, let others deal with their own prejudices and do what is best for you. Bankruptcy seems ideal in your husband's case.

Agreed! I think it's ignorance from people who don't fully understand it all or who have never experienced it.

[pamkev]

No truer words written Lady in Red

[LadyInTheRed]

Thanks everyone. Regarding Dave Ramsey, I read an interesting blog entry about him that speculated that he appeals to people who like to believe that they have some control over their destiny. Believing that it's your fault is only possible if you believe you have some power or some control. I think that explains some of the bizarre devotion to him. If he's wrong, it's like admitting that we, the American middle class, are basically just a little boat floating around in the ocean, getting pushed around by the currents and the wind. It's kind of scary to admit that we really do not have much control over our destiny, KWIM?

I like to believe I have control over some aspects of my destiny, including the financial aspect. Filing bankruptcy was an exercise of that control. Before that, it was the creditors who were in control.

[Dancer]

Thanks everyone. Regarding Dave Ramsey, I read an interesting blog entry about him that speculated that he appeals to people who like to believe that they have some control over their destiny. Believing that it's your fault is only possible if you believe you have some power or some control. I think that explains some of the bizarre devotion to him. If he's wrong, it's like admitting that we, the American middle class, are basically just a little boat floating around in the ocean, getting pushed around by the currents and the wind. It's kind of scary to admit that we really do not have much control over our destiny, KWIM?

His followers would tell me that I'm supposed to go back to work and put my kid in daycare all day long and my DH is supposed to work 2 jobs and never see us. All to pay off a mortgage that is underwater because property values fell.

My DH's subdivision has some special taxes. When it was built, the developers (declared bankruptcy in 2008 but that's okay since it was a business, right?) let the empty lots go into foreclosure. The banks that own the lots now refuse to pay the property taxes (doesn't that make them deadbeats???? hmmm) so the homeowners in the subdivision have to make up the difference so our property taxes kept increasing. And of course home values in the subdivision began to fall because who wants to buy into a subdivision where the property taxes keep going up? I'm guessing that Ramsey and his devotees wouldn't find much wrong with the banks and the developers here and conclude that the homeowners have to pick up the slack but I'm guessing that Chase (literally they are the bank that owns the lots) has more resources to pay the property taxes than the middle class families who live in that subdivision.

[LadyInTheRed]

Well said, papie.

[TXskyblue]

It's really easy for someone who's never lived through the crushing emotions of debt to tell someone else to take the Dave Ramsey route.

I can vouch for this. Before I get myself into crushing debt, I thought bankruptcy was a cop out and that if people just tightened their belts then they could do the honorable thing of paying back their debts.

Paying just the substantial minimums on 70k of credit card debt and seeing my balances go up every month because all my cash was going to the cards.....well, it sure gave me a starkly different perspective.

I'm not happy I got into that situation by my own hand, but I have zero regrets about filing.

[papie]

I work in the finance industry (and troll my fair share of financial forums) and I've ran into so many groups that LOVE Dave Ramsey. What most of these people have in common is that they've never experienced true financial hardships. Dave Ramsey's advice is great for people who have lots of frills and luxuries to cut and a manageable amount of debt to pay down. A lot of families in this country spend ungodly amounts of money on crap, and those people can often cut their budget and pay down debt. And that's a great idea for those that are able do that. I used to do financial counseling and reviewed budgets (the irony, I know), and there were a good number of people could easily find $1k month just by refinancing, lowering cable and phone plans, packing lunches, etc. It's kind of astounding.

But when you are paying out more than you make every month and barely covering basic necessities, bankruptcy is an amazing tool. I don't regret it for a second. I was working 8 a.m. to 10 p.m., commuting 2.5 hours in total, and still not covering our medical bills and utilities. There was no amount of budget cutting that could save us. I only wish we would have did it sooner, because we were those people who took every avenue possible to avoid it, cashing in retirement, selling whatever we could, and still getting no where.

And even with that, I view bankruptcy as a business decision, and people should do what is best for their family and their future. I've heard time and time again, that paying down debt is the "right" thing to do. And I'm kind of over that, because the banks and corporations in this country give exactly zero cares about doing the right thing, so I feel no obligation to perform some magical social duty and work 15 jobs to pay them. I'm over those days.

It's really easy for someone who's never lived through the crushing emotions of debt to tell someone else to take the Dave Ramsey route.

[TXskyblue]

When I filed, I worked zero OT for 6 solid months. Literally not one hour extra.

It's not illegal. It's just strategic planning. If you don't plan stategically, you'll end up with a payment higher than you should be paying.

[nmocean]

my wife was a loan officer for 19 years and banks and credit unions will not give a loan that counted on overtime to make loan payments and I agree. I asked if I would make the cc current and started making payments which we can afford now with new income, lawyer said no also said no to settling. when he showed me the breakdown there was almost 100% pay to trustee along with attorney. I said that looks like loan shark figures too me.