file BK without spousal approval.

[pamkev]

Kathy,
Baby steps which you are taking will get you to take those bigger steps later on.

When I am stressed I just think I can do this just for today, sometimes if its really bad might be a hour or even 1 minute just to get me through.

Here's to a good day today

[Drazil65]

Kathy, as you have experienced you will receive a lot of emotional support here. Baby steps, its the only way through anything in life and you are well on your way by meeting with the people from GA. You have it in you as you can see, to avoid the temptation by NOT going to the places where you get into trouble. As others have mentioned you cannot file bankruptcy without your husbands consent at this point because of the joint accounts/names. Chapter 7 is not your friend right now anyway, you are much too early in the process to file chapter 7 as it would only provide you with the means to get more credit and get further into a bad situation. You need to start where you are, at the bottom and work your way up, one day at time for you to appreciate the journey. Its the school of life or hard knocks, chapter 7 would not do it. You know you have to hit rock bottom before you can start your journey back up.

Keep pulling that overtime and doubles if it keeps you out of the casino, you may have to stop going for drinks after work as well and maybe going to the GA meetings or meeting with your sponsor instead. Its what you need to do right now so you just do it. This life lesson is tough BUT you are tougher, keep fighting and one year from now things could be completely different for you (in a good way). Good Luck!

[kathyc02124]

It's 10:15 and my husband is away tonight and I am home. I like that. No foxwoods tonight. That means a lot to me. And I'm not sure I would be here if I didn't have someone on here to tell all this to? Thank You everyone for listening.

[kathyc02124]

This is going to work. I met two members of a local GA group for lunch. They explained all about GA and open meetings and closed meetings and how sponsors work. I had fears of them being over powering "do gooders" trying to save me from myself. And they ended up being nothing like that. These two (a very well spoken gentleman and a female I am ok with, (we are both in the medical field) and I was a little stressed out but they didn't push me. I thought the meeting went very well as for learning about the program. We spent a little over an hour together and I agreed to meet them tomorrow evening at an open meeting. Keep in mind, all they know is I like to gamble. I have not discussed how deep in debt I am, but I think they suspect that I am in trouble. They had a meeting tonight for me to go to. Seems there is a meeting every night within 12 miles of here, at different locations. I prefer the one tomorrow night because it is held at a local hospital and I like that idea. Some are held in churches, some in hospitals, some in senior centers. I guess wherever they can get a meeting room to gather in?
I liked the one on one meeting with them this afternoon. I am stressed out about a public meeting. After our lunch I went back to work and thought about everything and got more stressed as the afternoon went on. My husband was due home at 4:15 this afternoon, but his flight was changed (as they often do) and he was dispatched to Miami and has to layover there until morning. Normally I would have stopped after work with some of the other people and had a few drinks and when they went home, I would head off to foxwoods for a few hours. But tonight, I stopped for a few drinks after work and when they all went home, I came home and here I am to talk about it.
Yes, I have had more drinks than I should have, but the big difference tonight is, my husband is away and I am home writing on here instead of hitting the slots.
I'm not perfect. I've done a lot of wrong things. I'm trying to make things right. I can't do it all at once. But I can see now that there are people that can help me. People that really do care, even though they have nothing to gain by it, except satisfaction of knowing they helped someone?
My husband can tell when I have stopped off for drinks because I ramble on and on, as I am doing here. It just makes me feel like talking to someone and admitting I have a problem to someone who cares.
If I am offensive to anyone, I apologize and I don't mean any harm. I like to gamble. I like to drink. I don't like to be in debt. I don't like who I am when I do this. I don't like lying and hiding things from my husband who loves me.I don't like being indebted to people who only care about money and not feelings.
I want to change. And I realize that I need help to do it. I need spiritual help. Financial help doesn't work. People have bailed me out. My husband. My parents. My brother.
I need to get through this financially, on my own. (With the help of bankruptcy to wipe it all out, would be a huge help). I have a big debt with someone that I would not want ANYONE else to EVER get involved with. And if my husband ever finds out about them, I will be in even bigger trouble than those people can even give me.
But, I am on my way to help. GA. Hope I am still welcome here in the meantime.

[AngelinaCat]

placed a call to the hot line last night and talked with someone for almost 1/2 hour. They said someone would call me this morning. I just got off the phone with my potential "sponsor" and we are meeting for lunch later today. Bet ya $5 I'll make it there?

Good Girl, Kathy! Please let us know how it goes!

[ValleYum]

[pamkev]

We are all behind you girl

[keepsmiling]

Attagirl

[Pjmax]

Kathy, that's great news!

[kathyc02124]

placed a call to the hot line last night and talked with someone for almost 1/2 hour. They said someone would call me this morning. I just got off the phone with my potential "sponsor" and we are meeting for lunch later today. Bet ya $5 I'll make it there?

[pamkev]

A baby step you took which is the beginning to many more steps. Please get to GA. You can do this I know.

I went though a drug addiction with my son when he was in his late teens early twenties, we had many steps forward and also some backwards including jail time. Nothing can tear a loved ones heart out they seeing someone you love behind bars, for him that was his bottom and he was never going back there again.

He is now walking a different path and that hard time seems so far away. I tell you this to encourage you.

YOU CAN DO THIS

[ValleYum]

Good for you, kathy! That is a huge thing you did changing the habit of going to the bar then to the casino last night.

You can go to a G.A. meeting online. Just Google and go NOW. Then find a real life meeting and go ASAP.

You can also start writing out your plan to get out of debt -which you can use it when you talk to your husband. Perhaps journaling (writing in a diary) would help you, too.

You can do this!

[kathyc02124]

worked a double today. Got off about an hour ago and came straight home. My husband is out of town this weekend. He works tuesday, thursday and saturdays and is away overnight. It is during his away times that I get through work and would head to foxwoods. But it is saturday night, he is away and I choose to be home tonight. If it means anything, I looked forward to coming home tonight to see my responses on here, as opposed to thinking maybe I could run over to foxwoods for a few hours and no one would know. I'm happy I did this. It showed me that I care about this board and that means a lot to me.
Pj. keep. pam, angel, pandora, carolyn, lady in red, I do read every word you write over and over. I have not disagreed with anything any of you have written. I have nothing to gain by just agreeing with you and then heading out to the casino. I'm home tonight at least partly due to your efforts? You have my attention. Until now I have answered only to myself and I would easily talk myself into stopping off for a couple of drinks after work since my husband is away and I would have some friends to talk to. After a few drinks I would decide I could run over to foxwoods and still be home before to catch a couple of hours sleep and no one would even know. I am so happy I found this forum. Thank you all for being here.

[Pjmax]

http://www.gamblersanonymous.org/ga/

[Pjmax]

In one of your earlier posts, you said you HAD a gambling problem. You HAVE a gambling addiction, and always will. You need help in managing this and the side effects that go with it, i.e. deception.

We don't really know you, but you have some caring friends here, and we sooo want things to go well for you.

Call GA now, and go!!! Please!!!