Told my wife

[AngelinaCat]

Hi BG. This is such GREAT news for you and your family. All of you are starting to heal now. Congratulations!

[Blackgoose]

Hey guys. What's up?!?!? It's good to be back. I've been busy interviewing lawyers these past two weeks. I'm still alive and feeling good about this "business decision" for my family. My wife has not only come back but is grateful that I came forward and shocked I carried all this stress by myself this long. We have sat down and prioritized our wants and needs list. I have also been offered a job that doubles our current salary and pays for insurance. Amazing how freeing this can be for your confidence and mind.

I plan on deciding on an attorney by the end of this week. Anyone in Utah have someone they would suggest?

Thanks for all the thoughts and kind words. Feels good to be back on the forum and in life.

"If you don't design your own life plan, chances are you'll fall into someone else's plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much."

[karm43]

Thank You God forthis forum and wonderful people. Amen I always took care of the bills I feel deep blame like you. She will come around. My husband knew, he just didn't know how bad it was. He thought I was just talk when I said we were in debt. It was a eye opener for him, after all he helped make the debt and decisions too. Deep down I know it will be ok. The only one that know are my kids, I am asshamed embarresed to tell anyone, thats why this sight is so nice. Cause I know I am not alone. YOU ARE NOT ALONE! YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

[pathfinders]

chiming in

[keepsmiling]

chiming in

[drowning123]

LOL! I missed all a y'all!

[oregonpilot]

A ditto to the ditto to the ditto.

[df04527]

and ditto what d123 said...

[drowning123]

Ditto what AC said.

[AngelinaCat]

Hi Blackgoose:

We are sorry the site has been down for so long. Please let us know how you are doing...

[AngelinaCatHub]

I hope we do hear from our friend. Even just a "I'm working on it" would do so we know he's alive or dead. (rhetorically). 'Hub

[disconapper]

I too, like most have been following this thread. This forum is an exceptional place for support, advice and stress relief. Everyone here cares and has similar stories, the advice and support you will receive is priceless. I told my parents, brother and my very close friends, the support from them was all positive. I hope all is well, I look forward to reading an update.

[mountanddo]

Yes, would love an update. You have been in my thoughts and my fingers are crossed that your wife has calmed down a bit and realizes that you both need to deal with this together. Hopefully when all is said and done your marriage will be stronger than ever!

[LadyInTheRed]

Hi, Blackgoose. I've been following this thread and haven't had anything to add to what the wonderful people on this board have said. I hope you have been able to move forward the last couple of days. Give us an update on how you are doing.

[Drazil65]

I am so sorry for your situation but use this time to make a plan and the rest will come. You may not want to plan and research right now but it will help you to feel like you are back in control (or on your way to it anyway). Start reading the stickies here and do some state research as well, plan out your attorney search. This will give you power (knowledge is power) for that next conversation (or at some point) with your wife, she will have to know that you are doing the right thing and she will want answers, you will have to come across with confidence to win her back.

Coming from a wives point of view, she will think this through, she is scared for herself and the kids, this is the unknown to her and she is pissed BUT she will eventually want to be part of the solution and will expect you to have answers. That's how I would be anyway because everyone deserves a second chance (we have all made mistakes my friend) but I would look to him for action (action speaks way louder than words). This will also occupy your time and when she is ready you will be ready.

Also, start to look for your attorney (free consults of course) and once the appointments are set up invite her along, this will show her that you want to fix this together and want to include her ( you cannot do anything about the past but include her in everything going forward), even if she is not ready to go at least you have asked and sometimes that's all we want, is to be asked/included (in the good and the bad).

Good luck and stay here with us, you have friends!